Every time she made dinner or was waiting for me to notice her barely there lingerie, I always tossed her a rain check like the asshole I am.
Noticing the split lip, she rushed over to the couch with this worried look that made my eyes want to roll back enough to examine my own fucked up mind as to why I found her caring for me so uncomfortable.
Her soft hands held my jaw on either side and forced my face in her direction. “What happened to you there tonight? Who did this, Bowey?”
She doesn’t know everything about the Clave, and I don’t know everything about Denmark yet.
Fair is fair.
Twisting out of her grip, I pushed the bottle to my lips, causing a sting against the open wound. Wincing silently, I pushed through the pain like anything else, and she handed me a pair of chopsticks like it would cure my ailments if I just dove into the disgusting Chinese food.
She wasn’t fooling me; she didn’t eat any more than I did. Only, my head wasn’t in the toilet forcing the little I did eat to come back up. I could hear her in the middle of the night quietly getting rid of whatever she consumed.
An after effect of Denmark, I’m sure.
My inability to eat came from a long life of having my appetite stolen from me while I took blow after blow of unfortunate events.
Shaking the bottle in the air, I let it be my response.
She sat so still on the couch, facing me, legs twisted together when she finally asked the question burning a hole in her soul. It was another try at getting me to give her another bone to hide away. “Have you kissed anyone but me?”
The answer should be obvious to anyone living with me this long, at least it should be. Especially to someone with the experience I knew Eve wouldn’t sacrifice. Not even for me. She loved experiences and collected them throughout our whole childhood.
I let my own collection of firsts halt the second she left LA.
The last and only time I kissed someone and meant it was when her butterfly died. I pressed my lips to hers when she fell asleep in my arms after crying for hours. I wanted to steal my way to a first without any impending fear like normal, and she was much less intimidating while asleep.
At least I always told myself she was asleep...
There wasn’t a doubt in my mind she had collected first kisses, first boyfriends, first everything when it came to mankind and human interaction.
I was Famine, slowly starving her of what she does best.
“I’ve seen the girls you’ve been surrounded by...” She was letting her jealousy show and my glare halted all fun, swallowing it whole.
“Not with women, is that what you want to hear, Eve? That I haven’t broken for anyone but you in any way? That I suffer only because of you? Or that I have more experience with men, and now I feel royally screwed because none of that applies to you?”
I felt the sting in the back of my eyes causing a splash of moisture that I knew would be impossible. All the ways I kill myself every day dry those up.
She sat up taller, the way my raised voice always had her falling back into princess mode like some PTSD trigger. “I didn’t know... I’m sorry. Do you think you might be gay?”
She wasn’t hiding the disappointment in the word that was wrapped around her stale breath as she awaited my answer.
I turned to face her, assessing every inch of her smooth skin for her reaction when she turned it all off. Miss Princess was numb and comfortable in being this lesser version of herself the same way I was. “No. I thought I was, but I tested that theory already. Apparently, my dick only likes you...”
Her cheeks flushed, and her tongue licked her lips in the most innocent way I had ever seen. “So, you haven’t tried anything with women? Tested another theory?”
Leaning into her, my fingers trailed down her exposed neck before making their way to trace her lips as I spoke, “Have you? I saw how you so willingly gave up these lips, my lips, to Abigail.” She stammered around sounds and I knew it only took one touch to set her off. “Seem awfully concerned with my sexual history when I don’t know who’s been between your legs.”
I watched her throat swallow, and I could see the nervous energy shift right into arousal even at the mention of anything sexual. Her chest rising and falling more quickly had my dick jumping against the zipper of my pants without warning.
“I saved myself for you, what really matters: my virginity, Bowey. I wouldn’t collect firsts with you just to give that one away so easily. It was always meant for you.”
Standing up, I shook off the attention she was bringing to my crotch. “Well, I didn’t ask for it and I don’t plan on breaking for you, Princess, so if you need my permission to get off elsewhere: here it is.”
I had to escape, find a cold, dark place to let my emotions die. Hot on my heels as I headed for the stairs, Eve was following me. She kept talking through this even though I clearly didn’t want to. “I don’t want permission to fuck other guys. I want permission to touch my husband.”
That name along with her beloved Bowey made me cringe.
“Why are you following me?” Still trudging up the stairs, I kept my eyes staring forward.
“I’m not done talking about this, Bowey.” She sounded vulnerable and desperate again, making me want to give her everything, but I couldn’t—not without strings.
Ignoring her pleas, I walked into my bathroom