“No wayyy,” a few of them exclaim.
“You have all the good goss,” someone else says.
Jennie smirks. “Yes way. You guys know our clan is basically the most powerful one, right? I mean, there’s a reason the chairperson of the council is always a seer.”
Hattie and I groan in unison. Jennie Byun—the most obnoxious human in the three realms—is a seeing witch. The Samjogo clan can get visions of truth simply by touching an item. They also have premonitions in their dreams, and the most powerful Samjogo can even see across space and time, which I’ll admit is pretty cool. But the inside joke is that their clan motto should be Power and Ego, not Leadership and Wisdom. Appa says they’re so full of hot air, it’s a wonder they still have their feet on the ground.
“And you know what else I heard?” Jennie continues. “All those plans to reopen the gifted library are a lie. The council has never figured out how to reactivate the library since the scholars got banished. And now, with the potential threat of the Horangi coming back, the elders have all the strongest protectors guarding the entrance. Right, Noah?”
Noah Noh, a Miru protector, looks back over his shoulder as we walk up the stairs of the noraebang. “It’s true they’ve got protectors working on a hush-hush project there. Don’t know any of the deets, though.”
I shudder thinking about the havoc the Horangi clan has caused. If it weren’t for them, Emmett would still be part of the community. His mom married a saram (which makes Emmett half saram, half gifted), and she was one of the first champions for more inclusive policies in the clans. Eomma says Mrs. Harrison and my auntie Okja used to be best friends. Then, when Mrs. Harrison died, Auntie O took over as Gom elder.
“Anyway, my mom is never wrong, so you heard it here first,” Jennie says. “You can thank me later.” She tosses her hair back so forcefully, it whips me in the face. Which hurts more than you’d expect.
“Oh, come on!” I moan. “Haven’t you ever heard of personal space, Jennie?”
She puffs out her chest and stares me down. “Don’t you dare tell me what to do, you fake witch.”
I shrink at the insult, which only fires up Hattie. “Watch your words, Jennie! Only cowards are bullies.”
“I’m not a coward!”
“Then don’t be a bully!”
Jennie harrumphs and storms off ahead of us.
Like I said, the most obnoxious person in the three realms.
When we get to reception, two people are waiting for us. They look like they could be college students. The girl is fixing her makeup (which is already flawless), and the pink streaks in her hair turn silver as she murmurs an incantation under her breath. Definitely a Gumiho illusionist.
Unlike the Gom, who, despite being healers, can’t heal their own bodies, the Gumiho can glamour themselves. It has to do with their beautiful patron, the Nine-Tailed Fox Goddess. That’s why they’re so good-looking and why so many of them become K-pop and K-drama stars. In fact, all but one of the BTS members are Gumiho. Yup. True story.
The guy at reception is wearing a sleeveless blue T-shirt with an image of a dragon swimming in a river. The message P&P 4EVA is etched onto the dragon’s chest, and I have to admire the dude’s dedication. Their saram clientele would be none the wiser, but his top is a dead giveaway that he’s a Miru protector. Provide and Protect is their clan motto, and blue’s their color.
Professor Ryu rubs her wrists together and shows her green gifted mark to the witches. The Gumiho nods and signals to the Miru, who promptly disappears in a gust of wind. I have no idea where he goes, but in the blink of an eye, he’s back—this time holding up an envelope. Superhuman speed must be so useful in LA’s traffic.
He passes the envelope to Professor Ryu. “Room eighteen today, Professor.” And to us, he says with a nostalgic look in his eyes, “Have fun, guys. I remember the good old days of Saturday School.”
Professor Ryu leads us to room 18, and it’s dim and windowless inside. It’s about the size of my bedroom, and the air smells a little like Cheetos, root beer, and something sour I don’t really want to identify. The large TV on the wall is flashing scenes from music videos and various song titles you can choose from. A large couch shaped like the letter C faces the TV, and between them is a low table with a few songbooks, a remote, some mics, and a feather boa. Cosette Chung, a super-pretty Gumiho witch (but unfortunately, Jennie’s number one henchwoman), immediately puts on the boa, and it’s not fair how good she looks in a tacky piece of pink fluff.
Professor Ryu finally opens the envelope, revealing this week’s glamour-reveal song. “‘Fake Love’ by BTS,” she announces, to which everyone fist-pumps and grins. It’s an oldie but a goodie.
“Now, when we get to Jimin and Jin’s hook,” she explains, “we just need to replace the words fake love with secret life. Everyone ready?”
She uses the remote to select the song. Music fills the room, and as the class stands in front of the huge TV with the scrolling lyrics, we sing our hearts out.
I’m so sick of this fake love secret life, fake love secret life, fake love secret life
I’m so sorry but it’s fake love secret life, fake love secret life, fake love secret life
As soon as we say the last words, the Gumiho’s glamour on the room starts to dissolve. The dingy walls shimmer as if they’re made of silvery water, and slowly they melt like hot candles.
Before we know it, the noraebang has disappeared, and we are standing in a spacious, brightly lit classroom with large beanbags instead
