“Oh, that’s rich, Anders,” she chortles.
“Hey, I wouldn’t blame you,” I say, knowing she can see the twinkle in my eye. “I’ve got the goods.”
“What you’ve got are cows that need to be milked. And please, don’t turn what I said into something sexual.”
Now I’m laughing. “You’re the one who likes to make it weird.” Then I feel a strange pulse of fear run through me, the idea of laying myself on the line. I clear my throat and she frowns, noting the serious expression on my face. “Listen, Shay…what we talked about the other day. About me showing you the country…I’d still like to do that.”
She studies me, brows coming together. “Like…traveling with me? But the farm…”
“Don’t worry. Kolbjorn will take over. I’ll talk to him and Per today, it will be fine. We can take a week off.”
“And the fishing?”
“Still have time before I have to go out to sea.”
“Will a week be enough?”
I give a melancholy smile, brushing her bangs off her face. “No. It won’t be enough. I want all the time with you possible. I want to wrap myself in every single second of you.”
She swallows, pressing her lips together for a moment while my fingers brush over her soft skin. “What happens when you go out to sea? You’ll be gone for how long?”
I shake my head. “It depends. But I don’t expect you to wait around. And I don’t think we need to talk about it either. Let’s just…take each day as it comes. Starting with today. I’ll help out Per this morning, call up Kolbjorn, he’ll come help out. Won’t be a problem.”
She observes me for a moment, worrying her lip between her teeth, and I’m holding my breath, praying she’ll say yes. I need to take her away from her, to give us both space to be together, be ourselves. I know I’m different when I’m not at the farm, and I want to give her all of my attention. Plus, I want her to fall in love with the country even more, in the vain hope that she won’t ever want to leave.
“Okay,” she says, smiling. “Let’s do it. Let’s take a road trip.”
I grin at her and kiss her forehead, the tip of her nose, her lips, just as my alarm goes off again.
I groan and pull myself away from her, knowing I need to get going. I sit on the edge of the bed and grab her hand, giving it a squeeze. “You sleep in. Take a shower. Then get yourself packed and ready. We’ll go before noon.”
She stares at me. “So soon?”
“I’m not wasting a single second with you, my sparrow,” I tell her, lifting up her hand and kissing her knuckles. “You’re mine until you fly away.”
I know I’m being bold, but I don’t care.
And, thankfully, she doesn’t seem to mind. She just gives me a shy smile, the kind of soft happiness that will leave an imprint in my brain all morning long.
I quickly get ready, her tired eyes watching me from the bed, and then I’m stepping out into the dawn, seeing that smile in my head, rising with the sun.
* * *
“Pull over.”
I look over at Shay, frowning. “You going to be sick?”
She gives me a dry look and smacks my arm. “No, though I’m starting to think you were a rally driver in your past life. I want to take a picture.”
“Oh, a picture,” I tell her. “This a new hobby of yours?”
She sticks her tongue out at me as I find the next pullout alongside the fjord, waiting for a car to pass before I head across and put the car into park.
We technically only left Todalen about ten minutes ago and Shay’s managed to take a million photos already. I guess the drive is extremely scenic, with the mountains dropping straight off into the fjord, but I’ve driven it so many times it doesn’t look like anything much to me. She’s good for that, though, among a million other things. Helping me see the things right in front of me.
Shay gets out of the Datsun and brings out the Pentax. We stopped by the corner store, which happened to have a roll of film (something to be said about a town that clings to the past), and she’s been alternating between her phone and the film camera.
I watch her as she takes her photos, the breeze brushing her hair off her shoulders. I feel like pinching myself that I got this lucky, that I have this chance to be with her like this.
It was easier than I thought, too. Per almost looked relieved when I said I’d be going off with Shay for a week. I guess he can get tired of me too sometimes, plus I’m not sure how much of Shay he heard this morning, but it’s got to be awkward to have the two of us in the house. And if it’s not awkward yet, it certainly will be, because I can’t keep my damn hands off this woman.
Anyway, Kolbjorn agreed to it, no problem, and so now I just have to slow down and hold onto every moment I can, like this one.
Finally, Shay turns around, putting her camera down, and smiles at me.
I automatically beam at her right back, feeling so much darkness lift inside me. As long as I don’t think about the future, as long as I only think about the here and now, that darkness can’t touch me. Not like it usually does.
She gets back into the car. “Okay, I promise not to do that again. I know we’re in a rush to catch the ferry.”
“Actually, the ferry leaves quite regularly,” I tell her. “It’s just the faster we go, the faster I get you to the hotel and get to fuck you until you can’t breathe.”
Her eyes go big, her mouth dropping slightly. She smiles, wagging her brows. “Oh. Oh my.”
That’s a look I
