Fast and Curious
“I hate being left to guard the base there ain’t nothin’ to do here!”
Tech E. Coyote connected the nanowires to the Deconstructor and looked up from his microscope. “Why don’t you complete some exercises in the training room?”
“Not supposed to go when I’m on guard and anyway I beat all the programs twice already today.” When Rev Runner “paced” back and forth, he dashed from one side of the room to the other, and Tech had difficulty following him unless he wore his Freeze-Frame Specs, which he hated doing because the strobe effect made him nauseous.
“Where’s everyone else?”
“Duck and Slam are out on patrol and Ace and Lexi locked themselves down in the basement they said to practice their fighting but heh heh heh anyway you know what I mean.”
Tech grinned. “Their secrecy is rather endearing.”
“They are both rabbits and would anyone really be surprised I mean come on after all that’s what rabbits do.”
“No kidding.” Tech rubbed his eyes. “Rev, could you just stand still for a minute?”
The bird screeched to a halt, his beak split in a grin. “Sorry Tech.”
“I swear, you do that just to annoy me.”
Rev arched an eyebrow, and grinned. “Roadrunners do love to annoy coyotes you should know that brainy boy.”
“I’m quite familiar with the biological instincts that drove our ancestors,” Tech said, grinning back. “Of course, here in the twenty-eighth century, we’re expected to be better than our instincts, aren’t we?”
“Speak for yourself I don’t know about you but I don’t get much chance to indulge my instincts.” He paused deliberately and then said, “Least until Zodavia hires a female roadrunner.”
“You might have to wait for another meteor to hit for that to happen,” Tech said. He stretched his long limbs back in the chair, and after a moment, Rev selected a nearby chair and sat down as well he draped one feathery arm over the chair and looked at Tech.
“You have a girlfriend before this whole meteor thing happened?”
The coyote shrugged and looked away. “Not really. Science was my girlfriend.”
“I dated Science in high school and she was kinda fun but lousy in bed you know?” Rev grinned. “Y’ever dated a girl I mean one that didn’t go crazy and try to kill us all later on?”
“I didn’t date her, she was just a student of mine,” Tech said, folding his arms. “And why are you so interested?”
“Hey just tryin’ to be a pal when I’m out on patrol with Ace he can’t shut up about all the bunnies he’s bagged and Duck is the same way though I’m pretty sure he’s making most of ’em up and I can never understand what the hell Slam is saying but I know I never heard you talk about a girlfriend so just thought I’d ask and you can ask me if you want.”
“I don’t want,” said Tech, which was only true because he’d run background checks on all the Loonatics and knew that Rev had in fact had three girlfriends. He was about to go on, but Rev was giving him the oddest look, sort of an arched eyebrow with a hint of a grin that was, he realized, an invitation. “But hey, if it’ll make you happy. You have any girlfriends?”
“Couple girlfriends here and there sure,” Rev said. “Couple boyfriends too.”
Tech froze in his chair. That couldn’t be true. He’d checked several times, once out of burning curiosity and later out of wistful hope, and none of the male Loonatics had any same-sex partners in his history. Of course, he thought in understanding, as his ears came down from their initial perk of surprise, Rev had somehow found out about his own preferences and was teasing him. Well, fine, he could play along with that. “Really?” he said, looking back and smiling at the roadrunner.
“Sure it’s no big deal but we kept it kinda quiet on accounta I was seeing Lodi at the time and I didn’t really want her to know I was fooling around but it never came to that cause she dumped me.” He grinned wider. “Girls huh who needs ’em right buddy?”
“‘Can’t live with ’em, can’t live without ’em,’ I believe the saying goes,” Tech agreed.
“I dunno about that I could live without ’em if I found the right guy know what I mean?” Rev leaned back in his chair and gave Tech a sideways look.
“Oh, uh, I…” Tech felt his fur prickle and flush, and three loose screws jumped from the table to stick to his paw.
Rev looked at the paw curiously. “You fixin’ to fix somethin’ there?”
“No, I, uh, I don’t know why I did that.” He willed his magnetism off, and the screws dropped to the floor.
“Shouldn’t leave ’em around I might trip and fall on ’em,” Rev said, looking amused.
“Sorry,” Tech mumbled, and picked them up again, turning to deposit them on the table.
“You’re kinda cute when you get flustered I never saw it before but you are.”
“I am not flustered!” he said, feeling the heat in the back of his neck as he turned to face Rev. The screws jumped from the table to his paw again. He shook his paw in annoyance as the roadrunner watched with definite amusement.
“Little trouble with the magnetism there?”
“No. I mean, yes, but don’t worry about it, I’ve got it under control.” He dropped the screws onto the table, took a breath, and scooted the chair away from the table, which brought him closer to Rev. “So anyway, you were going to go guard something?”
The roadrunner leaned forward and chuckled. “Don’t tell me you didn’t know cause I sure can tell about you what’s the matter gay-dar in the shop or something?”
“No, it’s in the third drawer from the left over there.” Tech gestured at the workbench. “But I mean, what makes you think that I’m, y’know…”
“Cause I see the way you look at Ace and yeah he’s pretty hot but he’s straight as an arrow more’s the pity and I see
