Missing the Big Picture

Name Is Steven, a scene ends with Stainer’s mother asking her son, “Why do you hate yourself?” This is a true story of a man who internalizes the abuse heaped on him by his abuser. He let it consume him to the point that he treated himself as badly as his abusive kidnapper did. The stigma surrounding male victims of sexual abuse is still as bad as it was for Steve Stainer in the 1970s and 1980s. A boy who is abused sexually and physically needs to receive the fullest treatment available to him and should never let the problem go untreated. Steve Stainer has helped break the stigma of male sexual abuse.

John Walsh: After his son’s kidnapping and murder in 1981, Walsh quickly realized how important it was to share his story and prevent the tragedy from happening to another family. His work on America’s Most Wanted has led to the capture of many fugitives. Walsh has also helped develop the National Association for Missing and Exploited Children, another resource that has helped change people’s lives by finding missing children. Walsh is an example of somebody who lived through something horrific, but is using it to make positive change for others.

Thank you for reading my story. Although I wish my life had been more normal growing up, I’m just glad that I now live with self-confidence and a compassionate and nonjudgmental attitude toward others, and I am able to view events in a positive and realistic manner—in other words, I now see the big picture in life.

Notes

1 Goldman, Russell. “Wages Through the Ages: Men Earn Less than Fathers at the Same Age”: ABC News, 2007.

2 Norris, Michelle, “Laura Bush, Putting Boys in the Spotlight”: NPR Interview, 2005.

¹ Jackson, Bechetta. “____ Suspends Faculty Member”. Times Union. Albany, NY. November 4, 1997.

² Brown, Cailin. “___Takes Aim at___”. Times Union. Albany, NY. September 7, 1995.

3 Nelson, Paul. “Crowd split on JROTC”. Times Union. Albany, NY. January 19, 2012.

4 Carleo-Evangelist, Jordan. “Media frenzy prompts appeal.” Times Union. Albany, NY. August 9, 2005.

5 Lefkowitz, Bernard. Our Guys. New York, NY: Vintage Books, 1997.

6 Elkind, David. 1967. “Egocentrism in Adolescence.” Child Development 38: 1025–34.

7 “Victim helps Amy Fisher win parole.” Chicago Sun-Times. Chicago, IL. May 7, 1999.

8 Craft, Dan. “Cosby’s Effect Comedian’s work crosses race and cultural barriers to touch many.” The Pantagraph. Bloomington, IL. April 24, 2003.

9 Somers, Suzanne. Keeping Secrets. New York, NY: Warner Books Inc, 1988.

10 Somers, Suzanne. After the Fall. New York, NY: Crown Publishers, 1998.