Emmy swished the wine around her glass and hedged a bit. “Oh, I am happy for them. I mean twins are a ton of work but two-times the fun, you know?”
“But?”
“But, in this time and in this place, delivering twins could be…” she trailed off with a shudder of apprehension and shrugged. “I’m just afraid for a delivery under these conditions. It’s like my personal nightmare.”
“And yer Baltimore is safer?”
“Where I come from, it would be infinity safer,” she clarified with complete honesty.
Connor imagined his brother’s despair in the face of the loss of his wife or child. It would ruin him, Connor knew. Ian centered his entire world around Dory and had been devastated by the loss of the previous babes in the past years. “It would help her if ye were here though, wouldn’t it? If ye know more than our doctor or the midwives from the mainland, ye could help her have a safe delivery, couldn’t ye?”
“Experience always helps, but Connor, I’m just not sure about what could go wrong. There could be complications. There’s just no way to know here,” she vented in frustration.
“There’s never a way to know anywhere,” he argued. “Ye just have to take it as it comes and hope for the best.”
“Next you’ll be saying that whatever happens, it’s the will of God,” she laughed and took another long sip of the wine. “Believe me, Connor, there are ways to know.”
Connor was momentarily affronted that she would mock the power of God’s will, but did not venture from the topic. “Anything I can do to help ye I will,” he assured her. “Whatever ye need, I will get it for ye.”
“Well, a peek into a well-stocked medical bag wouldn’t go amiss,” she admitted. “I’d like to see what’s available to work with.”
“Consider it done.” He raised his glass and she saluted him in turn.
“There is one other thing that you could do for me, Connor,” she said softly after a long period of companionable silence running a finger pensively along the rim of her glass.
“What’s that?” he asked his voice full of dread.
“Believe me,” was her simple request.
Connor studied her for a long while. She was slouched back in the chair, sitting on one foot while she swung the other idly back and forth. The way she leaned against the arm showed a complete lack of decorum, something Heather had prized. But still…“I canna,” he insisted.
“Why not?”
Because he wanted her to be Heather, he realized. He wanted her to be his long-lost wife, to belong to him, to have a life in Scotland and family worth staying here for even if that family was her sister and future niece or nephew or both. If she was just a doctor from Baltimore there was no reason for her to stay, nothing to keep her here. If he admitted to her or anyone else that he had considered for even a moment that she was not Heather MacLean! Why then he might as well hold the door open himself as she left!. He didn’t want that to happen yet. There were possibilities here, something between them that he meant to explore.
With her he felt alive, not awash with the anger that had ruled his life for so long. She made him smile and even laugh out loud, something he felt like he hadn’t done in years. Heather had brought that to him and he intended to keep her, even after the pain she had caused.
Yet, strangely, he didn’t feel that anger in him any longer. That burning hatred and humiliation. Had he forgiven her those trespasses? When did that happen? How had that happened? Had this new attraction between them, the affection he felt for her allowed him to look beyond the past? Or even forgive? Connor shook his head and wondered.
When his silence reined, Emmy whispered the terrible truth which had been plaguing her, “I wish I was your Heather, Connor. There was a moment last night when I wanted nothing more. But I am not.”
“Ye are,” he insisted.
Emmy got to her feet clenching her fists in frustration as she stuffed her feet back into her slippers. “You are the most stubborn ass of a man I have ever met!” She stomped her foot and turned to leave the room.
“Wait!” he called rising as well fishing for something to keep her here. “I was hoping we might go for a ride together this afternoon!”
Emmy flung her arms in the air. “Argh!’ she vented as she turned to flee, but Connor caught her arm spinning her back to him.
Cupping her cheeks in his hands, he caught her gaze with his and held it. His thumbs caressed her cheeks as she glared up at him. “What?!” she demanded.
“I am trying to ‘let it go’ as ye suggested,” he whispered gruffly. “I am trying, but can ye not give something in return?”
“I am not your wife,” she stated stubbornly.
“I know. Have I not already conceded that I have no wife?” Connor leaned closer and nuzzled her cheek cutting off her protest. “I have been thinking that we might try again, my love. Much has changed. We have the chance to get to know each other this time. We have both matured, have we not? Is there not an attraction between us now that was not present before?”
Emmy could not stop her head from falling back allowing him access to her neck as he began to kiss and suck lightly bringing shivers of desire as she clutched his shoulders and pulled him closer. “Man, you are such an idiot,” she whispered in a low tone that belied the harsh words.
“If wanting ye makes me one, than I submit to yer judgment,” his lips traveled back up and