“What happened?” Madeline turned to the doctor, who made eye contact with Brandon.
“I’ll explain,” Brandon said, thanking and excusing the doctor from their room. “Noah was climbing on one of the awnings at school. Apparently he and Jamie got in a fight on top of the awning and he fell down.”
“Jamie pushed him?” Madeline was sure that other boy was to blame.
“Noah says he fell,” Brandon responded. “It’s hard for him to talk. It seems like he took a few punches to the face before falling down. He broke his cheekbone and a few ribs. He’s on pain medication now, so he’s pretty out of it. We need to just let him sleep.”
Madeline nodded and sat down on the side of the hospital bed. She held her son’s hand and watched him breathe. She felt like an outsider in the room, like she was intruding in an intimate family moment. But this was her family, even when she wore her senator clothing, she was still Madeline the mother. It was a costume she could never take off.
Brandon was sitting in one of the chairs in the room. She could feel him looking at her, but they said nothing. The clock ticked. Noah sighed. Machines beeped. Madeline and Brandon were silent. When her back started to ache from sitting on the edge of the bed, she moved to the other metal chair in the room and pulled out her cellphone. She had messages from Jane, Hunter’s speech to read, a few other notifications.
“You’re working?” Brandon asked. To Madeline it sounded like an accusation.
“He’s sleeping,” she motioned to her son with her cellphone. Madeline wished she could have left Madeline the senator at home, but it was one of those days she couldn’t. Mothers are required to juggle hundreds of balls. The balls aren’t just motherhood and career, but every little thing that each of those entail. In one hand, Madeline juggled Noah’s problems at school, giving Adam the love and inspiration he required, finding time for family dinners. On the other hand, there was her career; the SAVER Bill, her reelection, her constituents. Then the blackmail was thrown into the loop and Madeline had to keep juggling, hoping no balls would fall. But balls will fall. No one can juggle everything. And no matter what falls, women will be judged for it. They will be judged for not handling everything. For not juggling even more balls. At this moment, Madeline knew she would have to drop the ball for Noah. She could be judged for holding onto her career balls above her family, but sometimes these things must be done. Brandon was there, he could catch this ball and be there for Noah when she couldn’t. She would trade this ball for a sheet of guilt that she would struggle and fail to get out from.
She sat quietly in the chair and worked while Brandon sat with his hands in his lap looking at his son. When nurses came in, he spoke with them. Madeline looked up occasionally, but she was focused on her phone. When the morning turned to afternoon and Jane began pestering Madeline to get to the event, Madeline knew she had no choice.
She had to attend her reelection campaign launch event. She wanted to tell Brandon that it was important for him to come as well, but she knew she couldn’t. That would make her also drop another ball on her marriage and it seemed like her marriage didn’t have many balls left.
She would have to attend the event alone, hoping there weren’t too many questions about the absence of her husband. Unfortunately, the absence of a spouse didn’t look good for politicians. It suggested marital problems, which made people uncomfortable. Why should they entrust the country to someone who couldn’t protect their own marriage? Madeline would have to be even stronger that evening to overcome Brandon’s absence.
This was a big night for Madeline. For so many reasons. In the car, she tried to take a few deep breaths. She wanted to be able to enjoy the evening. After all, this event was part of her dream. She felt like she was being punished for wanting something for herself, wanting to pursue something that took away from her family. For a moment, she wondered if it was worth it. But the moment quickly passed.
Chapter 29
Three hours early was considered late for Madeline to arrive for her event. She needed to change her clothes, have her hair and makeup professionally done. She needed to rehearse her speech from the podium, reading it from the teleprompter and practice walking on and off the stage. She needed to learn the choreography for the evening, where she should stand during different parts of the events, how to get from place to place, how to mingle and make everything look perfectly natural and unchoreographed. Jane also needed to go through all the VIP attendees with Madeline and give her talking points for each one—Madeline would need to remember to ask about people’s spouses, children, businesses, it was important for people to feel she had a personal interest in them and remembered everything they told her in previous meetings. With so little time to prepare, Jane went through the VIP list while Madeline’s hair and makeup were being done, screaming over the hair dryer and accepting that Madeline couldn’t respond while her lips were being painted.
When the event was about to start, Madeline looked nothing less than presidential. There were no bags under eyes even though she hadn’t slept the previous night, and no wrinkles on her face. The gray in her hair had been painted over and she was glowing. She pinned an American flag on the lapel
