She fought her tears, and she felt her lips tremble. “I… I don’t want to talk about it.”
“I’m your husband.”
“My past is painful, and I just want to forget it.”
“Maybe I can help by making it less painful. Sometimes telling someone lessens the pain and makes the coping easier.”
Elsie’s mind was spinning. He would be her husband for life, whether or not they consummated the marriage, so he should know her past. “Is there somewhere we can sit?”
Conner looked around. “There’s a bench outside the barber’s shop and it’s closed. No one will bother us here. The street is unusually quiet right now.” He pointed to the far end of the street. “In a few hours, the saloons will rock with music and noise, but it’s still early. Let’s sit by the barber’s shop.”
As they walked the few feet to the bench, Elsie planned where she might start her life’s story.
Once seated, she began. “A coal mine accident killed my father when I was nine years-old. An elevator fell on his head and crushed him.”
“I’m sorry,” Conner whispered.
“My ma was beautiful with a face like an angel, blonde, shiny hair, and all. She remarried two years after my pa’s death. I had two brothers, but they were older by then, and they worked in the mines, one town over from ours. Since ma remarried, our family wasn’t close anymore. My brothers didn’t like ma’s husband, so it was just my ma, my stepfather, Frank, and me at home. Things weren’t like when my pa was alive. He and my ma had a wonderful, loving marriage, but Frank and ma fought all the time. He was a drinker and got mean when he was drunk.” Elsie took her handkerchief from her pocket and dabbed at her eyes.
“Hey,” Conner whispered, “I didn’t mean to upset you. You needn’t finish.”
“I might as well. I’ve already gone this far.
“So, I saw a lot of things. Frank sometimes hit my ma, and a few times, he even went after me if I was dumb enough to let him see me when he was drunk.”
Elsie clenched her fists. “One night, he pushed my ma, and she fell down the stairs and died.” Elsie wiped her tears away. “When the sheriff came ‘round, he told them she fell. I knew he’d pushed her because I was hiding under my bed, but I could still see past my half-closed bedroom door.”
Conner grabbed her fists and rubbed them until she opened her hands. He continued to hold them. “Did you tell the sheriff what really happened?”
“No. I was afraid of what Frank would do if I did. I had nowhere to go, and I was scared to death of him.
“After ma’s funeral, the minister told me to pray, so I did. I prayed every night for a way to get away from the house and Frank. I’d just turned seventeen, and I didn’t totally understand religion or God, but I did pray.”
Conner asked, “Did things get better after you prayed?”
Elsie shook her head. “No. Frank still would come home drunk. I’d hide when he did. Usually, I got away with hiding, but one day, he found me under my bed, and he dragged me out and... and...” Elsie couldn’t finish, her words turned into weeping.
Conner put his arm around her. “I’m so sorry I asked you to tell me this. Please don’t cry. You’re safe, now. I’ll protect you.”
Elsie looked up at him. “That’s why I wrote to the matchmaker. I saw her ad and knew it was my only way out. I needed a protector.”
Conner’s voice was soft and sympathetic. “Did Frank hurt you... I mean...”
“No, but he came close. He pushed up my nightgown... I knew what was coming and felt panicky. I felt around on the floor, found one of my shoes, and hit him over the head with it repeatedly, but it didn’t stop him. I lost my temper and told him if he didn’t stop I’d go to the sheriff and tell him I saw him push my mother down the stairs.” Elsie began to sob again. She felt Conner’s arm around her tighten.
“He swore at me and said that when he finished with me, I wouldn’t be talking to anyone. He said he planned to bury me in the backyard and tell people I’d run away.
“He dropped his trousers. I was frantic, and as soon as I saw what he was about to do to me, I kicked him as hard as I could, right between the legs, because that’s the part that was coming toward me. He fell backward, swearing, and I got up and ran out of the house... in my nightgown. I heard him try to run after me, but with his pants around his ankles, it slowed him down, and I thought I heard him fall. I ran like a rabbit into the dark. I found the road and just kept running.
“I didn’t know where to go. We lived out in the country without neighbors close by, so I just kept running until I came to a small log cabin set back from the road. I’d never have spotted it if a light hadn’t been on inside the cabin. I didn’t know if I was running from one monster to another, but I had no choice, so I knocked on the door to see a little gray-haired woman answer, and to my relief, she invited me in.
“Her name was Mae, and she was a kind woman. She was the first person I thought really liked me since my mother had died. I told her about Frank and what he’d tried to do as well as what he’d planned to do to me afterward.
“Mae
