It’s all been for nothing. All the sacrifices I made. All the times I said, “No,” to anything even remotely fun. All the lost opportunities… to live rather than just behave. The list, my secret recipe for success, is worthless. At twenty-nine, what do I have to show for it? Nothing. No job. No boyfriend. Everyone thinks they can walk all over good old Blair because she’s too polite to say anything. No more.
Rage takes over. My fury bubbles up and I vomit years of repressed feelings and self-imposed restraints on Gerard. “A scene? You don’t want me to make a scene?” I get up and throw my napkin on the table. “Well, guess what! You’re out of luck.”
“Blair, don’t—”
“Why?” I scream. “So you can run to your office’s side dish with a clean conscience?”
“Don’t talk about Laura that way. I won’t allow it!”
“Do you prefer boyfriend-stealing bitch?”
Everyone in the room is staring at us now.
Gerard’s ears turn a deeper shade of red. “Blair, please sit down, you’re embarrassing yourself.”
“I’ve nothing to be embarrassed about,” I yell. “I’m not a cheating, lying bastard! Ladies and gentlemen, please give a round of applause for Gerard Wakefield and his mistress, the secretary, Laura.”
A server arrives at our table and stares at us, perplexed. “Spaghetti marinara?”
In a crazy impulse, I say, “Mine.” I grab the plate and before I know what I’m doing, I tip it over Gerard’s head. “How’s this for a scene, Gerry dear?”
Gerard shoots to his feet, his head, face, and suit dripping marinara. “You crazy bitch!” he shouts, dabbing the sauce off his face with his napkin. “It’s hot sauce! You could’ve blinded me. I’ll sue you for this.”
“Please do,” I shout back. “But be prepared to fight me in court. I’m sure the managing partners at your firm will be thrilled to learn of your extracurricular activities with their employee. They’ll fire you on the spot!”
That shuts him up. Gerard opens and closes his mouth like a gaping fish. To stare at his spaghetti marinara-covered head would almost be funny, if the situation wasn’t so tragic.
With one last glare, I storm out of the restaurant. Utterly lost and with no idea where I’m going, I run outside into the night. Oh, it felt so good to let it all out. Gerard’s spaghetti-splattered head flashes before my eyes again and I can’t help but laugh. A crazy, hysterical, uncontrollable laugh. Not being in control is great. Not holding back is fantastic. I should’ve done it a long time ago. I should’ve done so many things. All my life, I’ve had it backward. I’ve spent years caged behind the bars of the list, never allowing myself a moment of fun. That’s over. The list’s regime ends now.
I fish the page out of its honorific pocket in my bag and do a quick scan of all the taboos there.
“You’re a fraud,” I accuse it. “You’re a useless piece of nonsense.”
Years spent always being good, always being in control, always working hard—and for what? I have nothing.
My first instinct is to tear the sorry piece of paper into a million pieces, but a more powerful, self-destructive impulse takes over. Tearing the list is not enough; I need to completely overthrow it! Each line, each forbiddance, each bit of life I’ve denied myself will be experienced, starting tonight!
I scan all the don’ts in search of something stupid and reckless. My eyes stop on a vicious-looking set of words. I nod. It’s as good a start as any, and I can tackle it right away.
Grab your copy of I Have Never right away!
The First Comes Love Series
Also by Camilla Isley
Romantic Comedies
Stand Alones
I Wish for You
A Sudden Crush
First Comes Love Series
Love Connection
Opposites Attract
I Have Never
A Christmas Date
To the Stars and Back
From Thailand with Love
You May Kiss the Bridesmaid
Sweet Love and Country Roads
Christmas Romcom Series
Fool Me Twice at Christmas
A Christmas Caroline
Home for Christmas
First Comes Love Series Box Sets
First Comes Love (Books 1-3)
Then Comes Marriage (Books 4-6)
Beach Reads Box Set (Books 1-6)
New Adult College Romance
Just Friends Series Box Sets
Just Friends - The Complete Series
Just Friends Series
Let’s Be Just Friends
Friend Zone
My Best Friend’s Boyfriend
I Don’t Want To Be Friends
About the Author
Camilla is an engineer turned writer after she quit her job to follow her husband on an adventure abroad.
She’s a cat lover, coffee addict, and shoe hoarder. Besides writing, she loves reading—duh!—cooking, watching bad TV, and going to the movies—popcorn, please! She’s a bit of a foodie, nothing too serious. A keen traveler, Camilla knows mosquitoes play a role in the ecosystem, and she doesn’t want to starve all those frog princes out there, but she could really live without them.
Connect with me:
My Website: www.camillaisley.com/
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Acknowledgments
Thanks to all of you for downloading this book. My readers are my strength and without your constant support, I wouldn’t keep pushing through the blank pages.
Thank you to Rachel Gilbey for organizing the blog tour for this book and to all the book bloggers who participated. I love being part of your community.
Thank you to my street team, and to all of you who leave book reviews. They’re so appreciated.
Thank you to my editors and proofreaders, Michelle Proulx, Helen Baggott, and Jennifer Harris, for making my writing the best it could be.
And lastly, thank you to my family and friends for your constant encouragement.
Cover Image Credit: Created by Freepik
