“You okay, boss?” Sparrow asked, and I resisted the urge to flip her off.
“Fine,” I muttered.
“Just curious. What with all the shouting and the praying to God,” she said, buffing her nails.
“Stop it.”
“Hey, we’re not saying anything,” Sparrow said, holding up her hands.
Olly, indeed, didn’t say anything, but I noticed the look in his eyes.
“You’re saying something right now.”
“You’re right. I am. I just want you to be smart. You know who she is, boss.”
“I’m not going to fucking hurt her.”
She shook her head, and I opened my mouth to snap back, but she held up her hand.
“I believe you. I believe you’re going to try. But what about you? What happens when she hurts you?”
I frowned, shaking my head. “It’s not… It’s not that.”
I thought about that broken condom, but I knew it was a long shot. I did not just get her pregnant the night before.
Just the thought of that word made me want to throw up, and I swallowed hard.
Because I had already nearly been a father once, had almost held my child, and now I couldn’t. All of it was gone, and I wasn’t going to put myself in that situation again.
“I’m going to go wake her up. We have shit to do.”
“You’ve got it. We’re here when you need us.”
I shook my head and headed back to the room. London was up by then, already dressed and her hair piled on the top of her head. She frowned at me as I handed over a cup of coffee, and she studied my face.
“What’s wrong? Is it about last night?” she asked, and I felt like a fucking bastard.
“Nothing’s wrong,” I muttered. My tone tight.
She flinched then rolled her shoulders back, becoming the strong princess I knew she was, strapping on that armor that she used to block out the rest of the world.
“I thought… You know what, never mind.”
“There’s something you need to know,” I said, figuring I should just rip off the bandage quickly.
“Did you find out who it was?”
I shook my head. “We will. Today if I have anything to say about it.” I paused, knowing I needed to tell her. “Hell, I’m pretty sure the condom broke last night.”
Her face drained of color, and she set down her untouched coffee on the nightstand. “Are you sure?”
“Looks like it in the trash, but it could have happened afterward when I tossed it in. I’m pretty sure I would have noticed last night if it had happened during…”
Not that I had been thinking too hard other than wanting to get inside her the night before, but I didn’t say that.
She let out a shuddering breath and once again rolled those shoulders back. “Okay. Fuck.”
I hated the fact that my dick went hard at the sound of that word coming from her mouth.
“I don’t know what you want to do about it,” I said honestly. “It’s your choice.”
She shook her head. “I’m on birth control. I have been for as long as I was old enough to make my own decisions. But we can take other precautions.”
I nodded. “We’ll take care of that today.”
“Good.”
“Well then.” I let out a breath, knowing what I was going to say was going to be the worst possible thing, but it was what was needed. “That can’t happen again.” I felt like I was shredding my heart. Last night was one thing, but nothing said get your house in order like a fucking broken condom.
“Excuse me?” she asked, taking a step back. “What the hell?”
“I’m just saying, this was a wakeup call. I’m your bodyguard, not someone you should be fucking.”
“Fucking. So that’s it?”
“That was always what it was going to be, princess.”
“I hate when you call me that. You use it as an endearment once and then a slap in the face the next time. Make up your fucking mind.”
“Look at you with the potty mouth. Is that what happens when you fuck the help?” If I made her angry enough, she’d stay away. She’d see how bad I was for her.
“You’re lucky I don’t slap you right now.”
“Maybe you should just do it and get it over with,” I dared her. I sat my coffee down before I spilled it or broke the fucking mug. “You and me? Last night I—” I needed to get this right. “I thought we could keep this contained here. That I could give you what you needed for a moment in time. But this morning, that was one hell of a wakeup call. You’re not some random woman. You’re a princess. It will be bad for you.”
“Fine.” She squared her shoulders. “But you know what? I’ve had just about enough of men making decisions for me. You’re scared. Say that. Don’t give me some bullshit about not being right for me. About us never working...”
“I’m not scared of anything,” I lied.
“And you are an idiot if you believe that.”
“Maybe I am, but it doesn’t matter. You’re not for me just like I’m not for you. You’re a fucking princess, or did you forget that? Guys like me don’t end up with the happily ever after. That’s not how this goes.”
“How can I forget it? Everyone reminds me every second that they possibly can. And when I look in the mirror, I see the tiara even if it’s not on my head. I had to leave my country because of the title I have. Because of rules that I had no part of, rules I didn’t even realize existed that want to change my purpose and put me on a path that I didn’t ask for. I know I’m a princess, Kannon.”
“And I’m not your fucking prince. You belong with your family, and we’ll get you back there. I’m just the farm boy, and nothing is as you wish.”
I let out a curse as she pushed past me, the look in her gaze pure hatred. She shoved her shoulder into my side and
