By the time the doctor arrived, Evie was in tears, convinced she was miscarrying – although there had been no further bleeding.
It was a duty doctor, a younger man, who examined her, told her the baby’s heartbeat was good and that minor bleeding did not always mean a miscarriage. Telling her to take it easy and come into the surgery to see Dr Oates as soon as she felt well enough, he said, ‘He’ll want to keep an eye on you, but I’m sure it’s nothing you should be worried about, Mrs Barrington.’
The following morning, with still no word from Douglas, Arthur Leighton arrived at the house. Evie had got into the habit of rising to join Jasmine for breakfast, before returning to her bed, unable to face the world. That morning, she was still sitting in the dining room, clad in her dressing gown, her hair uncombed, breakfast untouched, when Arthur was shown in by a frowning Aunty Mimi.
Evie looked up and saw his face was drawn and his eyes full of concern. She stood up. He moved across to her and she realised he intended to embrace her. Backing away, she said, ‘Did he send you here?’
Arthur nodded.
‘Too cowardly to do his own dirty work. He’s spineless.’
‘He wants to talk to you.’
‘I don’t want to talk to him.’ She slumped back into her chair, and pushed her teacup out of the way. ‘Did you know? Oh, God, why am I even asking that? Of course you knew. You’re his best friend.’
Arthur shook his head, his face stricken. ‘I didn’t know, Evie. I promise you I’d no idea. Doug is a very closed person. He tells me very little and certainly didn’t tell me that. He found it hard enough to tell me when he turned up at my office last night.’
‘Why don’t I believe you, Arthur? Why can’t I believe anything you or anyone else in this godforsaken country tell me?’
He pulled out the chair next to hers and sat down. ‘Because I care about you, Evie. I know that’s probably the last thing you want to hear right now. But I hate to think of the pain you must be going through.’ He paused. ‘Because I love you.’
Evie snorted. ‘Stop! I don’t want to hear that. My husband is disporting himself with a Malayan whore while I’m carrying his child. No, Arthur, your declarations of love are the last thing I want to hear.’
‘I didn’t mean it that way, Evie. We both know you and I can never have what I’d like us to have, but that doesn’t mean you don’t matter to me more than anyone or anything in this world.’
Slumping forward, she rested her head on her hands. ‘Go away, Arthur. I can’t even cry any more. I have no tears left. Everything is ruined. I was trying so hard to make a life with him. I thought at last we were a family. And he’s destroyed it all.’
Arthur said nothing but placed a hand on her arm. She found the contact strangely comforting and began to cry.
‘I may be going to lose the baby,’ she said.
‘What?’
‘Last night I lost some blood. Aunty Mimi called out the doctor.’
‘What did he say?’ He frowned with concern.
‘Bed rest. Wait and see. He said bleeding doesn’t always mean the worst. If I can get through the next few days I’ll be past the first twelve weeks and that’s meant to be the most dangerous time for miscarrying.’ She lifted her eyes to look at him. ‘Part of me wants to lose the baby. To punish Doug. It’s all he cares about. I’m just a vessel to carry his child, like a hermit crab. I’m not a proper person in my own right.’ She rubbed at her eyes.
Arthur handed her an unused napkin.
Through her tears she said, ‘Why am I saying this? I don’t really want to lose the baby! I don’t. Even if it has to grow up without a father. I couldn’t bear to lose it. I just don’t want him near it. He’s an unfit father. A lying, cheating, faithless man.’
‘Look, Evie, it’s because of the baby and Jasmine that you must let him talk to you. He wants to explain. He’s a mess. Distraught. Please, give him a chance. Just listen to him. I’m saying all this because I care about you. Because I want the best for you. And the best thing is that you and he manage to patch things up and look for a way forward.’
‘You mean him, me and his Malayan whore?’
‘She’s gone.’
‘Gone? Where? Back to her kampung down the road where he can visit her when he pleases? I don’t want to know about his sordid arrangements. I don’t want to hear his feeble excuses. He’s a liar.’ She dragged the napkin over her eyes then flung it down on the table. ‘Why the hell didn’t he marry that girl in the first place and have lots of little half-breed children instead of dragging me across the world?’ Turning to look at Arthur, she added, ‘No, don’t bother to answer that. It’s not the done thing, is it? All right for the Dutch or the French to marry local girls but the British frown on it, don’t they? What’s the expression? Infra dig, that’s it, isn’t it? No, they wouldn’t like it at the Penang Club, would they? They wouldn’t approve of that at all.’
Arthur said nothing, but put his hand back on her arm.
‘I wish to God I’d never agreed to marry him. If I’d stayed in Hampshire I’d have had a quiet uneventful life, but at least it wouldn’t have been one of utter misery. I’ve put everything into this fragile chance of happiness. I’ve worked hard trying to make this miserable marriage work.’
She glanced at him quickly, before looking away. ‘Even though, ever since that day at the beach, I knew I couldn’t love him, because of
