‘Singapore. I’ve been offered a position there, reporting directly to Sir Shenton Thomas. I accepted it this morning. I’m leaving straight away.’ He looked up at her, his eyes full of love and Evie almost weakened. ‘Please, Evie, come with me.’
She kept her hands across her belly, to feel the presence of her unborn child, willing it give her strength to hold her course, when every nerve in her body was screaming at her to give way, to say yes to Arthur. And it wasn’t only the baby, there was Jasmine too. Her family. How could she abandon the little girl who had lost her own mother and placed all her trust and love in Evie? ’No,’ she said, trying to control the quaver in her voice. ‘I can’t do that, Arthur.’ She took a big gulp of air. ‘I won’t do that.’
’That’s your final decision?’
She nodded, mutely. ‘And you need to get help for Veronica. Maybe moving to Singapore will be the best thing for her too. A new start for you both.’
‘Last night when we got back from the club she threw another fit and tried to stab me with a carving knife.’
‘What? She tried to kill you?’
He ran his hands through his hair again. ‘Look, Evie, you’ve seen how she’s spiralled out of control.’ He put his head back, staring up at the cloud-covered sky. ‘I just can’t do it any more. It’s not just because of how I feel about you and me. I can’t cope with her any more. The drinking. The drugs. The aggression. The infidelities.’ He heaved a deep sigh. ‘No one else knows this, but she’s started picking men up and bringing them home with her. I don’t know how long it’s been going on, but last week I got back after a late meeting to find her with a man. In our home.’
‘Oh God. That’s horrible.’
‘A young assistant manager for Guthrie’s. Off the boat a few months ago.’
‘I’m sorry, Arthur.’
‘I’m not sorry. It’s made me realise I was caught in a trap. I don’t care about the consequences any more. I’ve spent years trying to do the right thing by Veronica, feeling sorry for her, for what happened to her, for her problems. I’m done. I’ve nothing left to give.’
‘You have so much to give.’ She fixed her eyes on him. ‘Things were better between you both before I arrived. Weren’t they? You can make them better again.’ She screwed a handful of her cotton skirt into a ball, squeezing it tightly as she forced herself to say these things that she didn’t want to say. ’Think of your career.’
‘Sod my career!’ He squeezed his eyes closed. ‘Sorry, Evie. I didn’t mean to swear at you.’ He shook his head. ‘But that’s all I’ve ever thought of until now. But it isn’t enough. Nothing is enough without you.’ He slumped forwards, his head in his hands.
Evie didn’t know what to say. The thought of no longer seeing Arthur, of no longer having him in her life, was unbearable – even if his presence had never been in the way she really wanted. But if either of them were to make something from this mess they had to put each other out of their minds and find a way to make their marriages work. The only way was to be brutal. Swallowing, she forced herself to say, ‘I will never leave Doug. The vows I took when I married him I took seriously. If I’d known I’d fall in love with you I’d never have made them, but I did, and I intend to stand by them. I’m going to do my utmost to make things work and I think you need to do the same with Veronica. She needs medical help, but most of all she needs you, Arthur. You’ve been her anchor and she must feel cut adrift.’
His face contorted as he absorbed the impact of her words. ‘You’re telling me to stay with her? In spite of everything?’
‘You have to do what’s right for you. But one of the reasons I fell in love with you is that you are a good man. God knows there’s no love lost between me and Veronica but I do feel sorry for her. Her behaviour is a cry for help. To you. The question is, are you ready to listen to it?’
He sat beside her saying nothing. The crowing of the captive cockerels down the street mingled with the clatter of dishes from the servants’ quarters at the end of the garden.
If only they could stay here in this garden, in this moment, away from everyone and everything that placed demands upon them. Held inside a bubble, frozen in time.
Eventually Arthur spoke, staring ahead of him into the middle distance. ‘You’re right of course. You’re so much wiser and stronger than me. If we can’t be together, we must each make the best of what we have been allotted.’
A wave of relief was mixed with a stab of pain at the prospect of him going away and no longer being part of her life. Pain that was also – she had to acknowledge it – resentment of Veronica for what she would see as a personal victory. The pain was all the sharper knowing that Veronica didn’t want Arthur for himself, only for what he represented, like a game trophy on a white man’s bungalow wall.
‘You’ll take her with you to Singapore?’
‘I’ll try and persuade her to see a specialist. Someone who might be able to help her.’
‘I expect getting her away from here will be a big step on the road to recovery.’ As she said the words they sounded false, insincere to her. If she were to speak the truth it would be that Veronica Leighton could go to hell or be locked away in an asylum for all she cared. Instead she said, ‘You’re doing the right
