“I’m trying to talk my overprotective brother into coming along and bringing you and Paxon with him.”
“What if we ask some of the guys working on the security system to go along?” Stella asked.
My brother stroked his beard. “That could work.”
“Please,” I begged, clasping my hands together.
“Let me talk to Rock first, and I’ll let you know.”
When I walked out of the cabin, Paxon was still out on the porch of his. “Well?”
“He’s talking it over with Rock.”
Paxon nodded.
“The thing is, the guy who owns the ranch is a mega rock star. He probably has more security at his place than we do here.”
He motioned me to go over to him, and we both sat down on the porch swing.
“Your brother also has to think about the other people who might be at this place. He doesn’t have time to secure a guest list and vet it.”
“I didn’t think about that,” I said, feeling like an idiot.
“You wouldn’t have any reason to. I hope once we’re gone, you have no reason to again. You should never have to live your life in fear.”
“There are other things to fear in life besides someone wanting to kill me,” I said, wishing I had thought it rather than said it out loud.
Paxon leaned over so we were almost close enough to touch.
“Like what, Flynn?”
I looked out over the ranch. “Nothing,” I mumbled. “I just meant in general.”
Paxon reached for my hand and ran the pad of his thumb over the back of it. “What things are there to fear in your life, Flynn?”
I shook my head, and my eyes filled with tears.
“You don’t know me that well, but you can talk to me.”
Maybe I could, if I could speak. I knew that if I did, I’d probably cry harder.
“I don’t know how much you’ve been told about who I am or why I’m here, but last year, I was undercover on an assignment that required me to make people believe I was a spy for another country.”
I turned my head to look at him. “I saw your arrest on television.”
“That was part of the assignment too. Anyway, the way people treated me then was something I never want to experience again in my life. When I was in the thick of it, I dreaded the look in people’s eyes when they saw me, or even just their expressions. They had so much hatred for me, and there was nothing I could do or say to defend myself.”
“That must’ve been awful.”
“It was harder than I thought it would be. Much harder, in fact.”
“They’re nicer now, though, right?”
“For the most part, although there are still people who see me as a traitor.”
“But you’re not.”
“Can’t turn those feelings off with a switch, though.”
“That makes sense.”
Paxon studied me, but I wasn’t ready to tell him what I lived in fear of. It was too humiliating to say I feared people calling me “heifer” and him or anyone else hearing it. Maybe he wouldn’t be able to flip a switch on seeing me that way himself.
I stood and put my hands in my pockets. “I have to get back to work. I hope my brother figures out a way that you and Stella can go to the Flying R with us tonight.”
“I hope so too, Flynn.”
I loved the way he looked at me, and at the same time, I hated it. I so wanted to believe he was attracted to me, but I was sure he was no different than any other man who saw me as fat and dumpy.
21
Irish
Flynn’s pain sat so close to the surface that it seeped from her pores in the same way her tears did from her eyes.
I wished she’d talk to me, confide in me, let me comfort and reassure her, but why would she? We’d only met earlier today. If I thought about it from that perspective, what made me think I had any right to ask?
I was still on the porch when Buck stalked out of the cabin next door. He walked over to his pickup without a word. When he threw stones driving away, I laughed.
Evidently, the honeymoon was over with Stella. It wasn’t surprising that it hadn’t lasted long. She was a fucking bitch as far as I was concerned.
Not long after, Rock drove up.
“Trouble in paradise?” I shouted.
“Something like that.”
“Heard there was a band playing at one of the neighboring ranches tonight.”
“Right. We’ll head out at about five thirty.”
The happiness I felt over hearing we were going, stunned me. Maybe it was just having a semblance of normalcy, even with bodyguards, that buoyed my spirits.
I met Stella and Rock outside when it was time to leave, somewhat surprised Buck wasn’t with them. I offered to sit in the back, like I would’ve anyway, pleased when Rock said we had one more to pick up, hoping it would be Flynn.
When she got in the truck, beside me, she sighed and fidgeted enough that it led me to believe she was uncomfortable. She hadn’t been that way with me before, so I wondered what was causing it.
When she twirled her hair with her finger, I reached out and touched her hand.
“You look very pretty.”
Instead of smiling or even blushing, Flynn looked perplexed.
“What?” I asked.
“You don’t have to say that,” she mumbled.
I moved my hand to her chin and turned her head so I could look into her eyes. “Flynn, you look very pretty.”
“Thank you,” she said, trying to turn away, but I wasn’t ready to release her gaze. Her eyes darted toward the front seat, making me realize this wasn’t the time or place to have this conversation. Flynn was already uncomfortable enough.
When we arrived at the other ranch, I realized we’d been traveling as a caravan. “Wait there,” I said to Flynn, jumping out and coming around to open her door. She smiled and took my hand when I offered it.
The band was already
