I was getting damn tired of not having a way to get around the ranch on my own. “What’s somebody gotta do to have access to a vehicle?”
“Here,” said Cope, tossing me a set of keys.
“Where are you off to?” asked Decker.
“You still my fucking nursemaid?”
Decker laughed. “No, I wanted a ride, asshole. But in the mood you’re in, I’d rather walk.”
“I’m going to the dining hall. Either get in the truck now, or figure it out on your own.”
“That’s what I like to see,” he said, walking past me and squeezing my shoulder. “Irish takin’ charge.”
When I pulled up, Decker walked in the direction of the main house and I went the opposite way.
“Can I help you?” a man who looked vaguely familiar asked.
“I’m looking for Flynn.”
“She’s not in today.”
“I see.”
“Can I tell her who stopped by?”
“Paxon.”
34
Flynn
I waited until I was sure Paxon was gone before I came into the kitchen from the storage room where I’d gone to hide when I saw him drive up.
“Thanks, Paco.”
“Man, Flynn, don’t ask me to lie for you again. That guy looked like someone kicked his damn puppy.” Paco rubbed his chest and winked.
“I’m sorry. I just didn’t want to talk to him right now.” I felt my eyes fill with tears like they did every time I thought about Paxon’s reaction to me attempting to kiss his cheek. I’d suffered through a lot of humiliation in my short life, but that had to have been the worst. It was like I was a six-year-old and giving him cooties.
“Come here,” said Paco, motioning to the chair he’d pulled away from the table. When I sat, he did too.
“I’ve seen you with him. What’s his name? Paxon?”
“Everyone calls him Irish.”
“That’s a weird name too but better than Paxon,” he mumbled and then looked into my eyes. “He seems like a decent guy. Tell ol’ Paco what happened.”
I laughed. “Ol’ Paco? What are you, twenty-five?”
“Older than you. Now, quit changing the subject. What happened?”
“It was nothing.”
“Right. That’s why you hid in the storeroom.”
Both Paco and I raised our heads when we heard the dining hall door open again. Paxon walked in, holding up a piece of paper. If I could crawl into a hole and disappear, I would. Now I felt even worse about asking Paco to lie.
“I was going to leave a note.” Paxon’s cheeks were flushed. I was upset with him for humiliating me, but I’d just done the same thing to him.
Paco got up and left the room. Paxon walked over and took his seat.
“I’d avoid me too if I were you,” he said.
I looked everywhere but at him. “What I did was inappropriate, and I’m sorry.”
“I don’t accept your apology.”
I met his gaze. “Why not?”
“Because you did nothing wrong.”
“You acted like—”
“A jackass.”
I shook my head.
He reached over and put his hand on mine. “I really like you, Flynn. In fact, I worry that I might like you too much.”
“You don’t have to do this.”
“Be honest with you?”
“Explain anything. You already said you wanted us to be friends. I’m the one who crossed the line.”
“Kissing someone on the cheek isn’t crossing the line.” He took a deep breath and let it out slowly. “I think I told you that I haven’t exactly lived a normal life the last few years. That includes not having a lot of human contact.”
I wanted to say I’d never had human contact, but stopped myself. I already felt pathetic enough without him needing to know I’d never even been kissed by a man.
He looked outside when two black SUVs drove by.
“Who is that?” I asked.
“Hard to say. There are a lot of people arriving today.”
“Because of your mission?”
“That’s right. We believe we’ve stumbled on two promising leads. We’ll be breaking into teams so we can follow up on both simultaneously.”
“I hope it goes well.”
He let out another breath I hadn’t realized he was holding. “Me too.”
“You should probably go,” I said when I saw three more SUVs drive by.
“I probably should, but first, I want to tell you that I won’t have a lot of free time in the next few days. Maybe longer. But when I do, I’d like to get together and talk some more.”
I pushed my chair back and stood. “That won’t be necessary.”
“Flynn?” he called after me, but I kept walking.
35
Irish
By the time I got to the main house, there was a crowd of people inside and more SUVs arriving. As I walked by people I’d heard of more than knew, several heads nodded in my direction.
“Irish,” said Razor Sharp, stepping away from two others I recognized. “Do you know Gunner Godet?”
“Not until now.”
Gunner joined us and shook my hand. “Shoulda called in K19 a long time ago, Irish. We woulda backed ya.”
“Hey, now,” said Doc. “Let’s not start with that shit. We’re backing him now. That’s what matters.” Doc shook my hand like Gunner had.
As I made my way to the front of the room, my eyes met Decker’s, and he motioned to where he wanted me to sit.
“I heard from Buck. He, Stella, and the rest of the crew should be here in fifteen.”
I stood when Burns Butler approached.
“Sit down, please,” he said, taking the chair beside me. When he didn’t speak, I surveyed the room from a new angle. There were men here I’d read about most of my career and doubted I’d ever meet, let alone work with.
“You ready for this?” asked Decker, approaching with Doc.
“I’m not sure having me in charge of this mission is such a good idea. There are others here—”
Burns slowly turned his head, but it was his hand on my arm that made me stop talking. “There is no one better.”
My eyes met Rile DeLéon’s, who was seated next to Kensington Whitby, his soon-to-be wife, from what I’d heard. I didn’t see Grinder, but Decker had mentioned he was in Italy and his wife was due to have a baby at any moment. She wasn’t
