15
Alicia
Present Day
“Oh, yeah!” Chase pumps his fist as we step inside Jill and Cam’s house. “Do I smell fried chicken?”
“You know it!” Jill grins, her fork poised at her mouth. “Help yourselves; everything’s in the kitchen. Please. Cam got so much.”
“That’s because I love my woman,” Cam says, piling his plate high in the kitchen.
I follow Chase through the house, noticing little changes to the décor.
“Stop calling me your woman.” Jill stabs a bite of salad, then points her fork at Cam.
Cam slides out of the kitchen to let us pass, and Chase hands me a plate from one of the cabinets.
“I’m not a piece of property,” Jill says.
Cam chuckles, setting his plate at the space across from Jill. “Okay, but after Saturday I’m referring to you as my wife.”
“Caveman,” she says while chewing.
“You love me.” Cam waggles his brows, then stalks over to her side of the table, his smile devious.
“Cam! No!” Jill shouts, but it doesn’t stop him.
Cam races for her, wrapping his arms around her and planting slopping kisses all over her neck as she laughs and begs for him to stop. They’re so damn happy. I don’t remember her being this way. Not so carefree and open with her affection for Cam. It only reiterates how much I’ve missed.
“It’s gross, isn’t it?” Chase whispers, leaning close. His breath tickles my ear and sends goose bumps down my arms. “They’ve been like this all month. I think the wedding made it worse.”
I swallow hard, but not because of anything he said. It’s more that I’m frozen in place with him this close. His good-humored smile is almost too much. I don’t deserve his friendship. I shouldn’t be here. Not after the hurt I caused when I cut him and everyone else out. I don’t understand why everyone is being so damn nice.
“Hey, what secrets are you two telling?” Jill shouts, shoving Cam back toward his seat. “Get in here and share with us.”
Chase looks away, focusing on filling his plate. Maybe I’m being overly sensitive, but I swear there’s an instant shift in his mood. I don’t know what erased his smile, but I want to earn it back.
I make my plate and join Cam and Jill at the kitchen table, feeling very much like an outsider. My stomach twists with nerves, but I do my best to eat because I don’t want to be rude.
“I really appreciate your help today,” Jill says.
“Yeah.” Cam nods. “And for coming in with the save. Jill won’t stop talking about how beautiful your parents’ place is. I can’t wait to see it.” He chuckles, shaking his head. “Kinda crazy to think this is all going down in two days.”
“I’m happy it all worked out,” I say as Chase takes the empty seat across from mine.
“Alicia’s parents are a hoot. They used to throw the biggest and best parties,” Jill says, pausing to take a sip from her soda. “I hope they’ll be around. I really miss them.”
I don’t exactly know how to answer. I can’t imagine my mom will hide away with everything happening on-site, but at the same time there’s a good chance she’ll be passed out drunk. “I’m sure Mom will stop by if she can.”
“Is your dad out of town with work?” Jill asks. “He worked in Spain a lot.”
“Um.” My stomach rolls and the urge to agree just so she’ll stop asking questions is really strong. “He used to.”
“He retired?” Jill says, clueless to my discomfort because I’ve become a pro at hiding the truth. “Wow. I never thought that day would come. Did your brothers take over the business?”
“Yeah.” I nod, able to at least be honest about this. “Ricky and Eddie don’t live and breathe work like he did, but they like it.” Or at least I think they do. My brothers never had the drive to do anything more than what my parents expected. Though, maybe that’s changed since they had to step up and take over Dad’s role. “They like charging their vacations on corporate credit cards anyway.”
Jill chuckles, nodding. “I’m sure that drives your dad a little crazy.”
“Yeah.” I drop my gaze to my plate. It would if my dad could communicate. I’m not sure how much he understands. There are some days I swear his eyes spark at the sound of my voice, but most, I have no clue if my weekly video chats are more for my sake than his.
Cam and Chase discuss a few logistics for the wedding set-up with Jill and I zone out, attempting to keep my food down when my stomach twists with nerves. I consider myself an honest person for the most part. Back when I was drinking, my existence was built on a carefully crafted stack of lies. It was for my survival, to keep others from noticing how fucked up I was, and how much I was drinking. But I gave that up when I got sober. Only, ever since coming back home it’s as if I’m back in that space. There are too many mistruths and secrets. They’re eating me up inside. I can’t keep up.
“No strippers.” Jill’s sharp warning pulls me back into the conversation. “I mean it, Chase. You promised.”
He chuckles, shaking his head. “I would never cross you.”
“Don’t let her threats intimidate you.” Cam grins. “She’s all bark and no bite.”
“You wanna test that theory the next time I have your dick in my mouth?”
“Jesus.” Chase scrubs a hand through his hair. “I don’t want to know about your sex life. It’s bad enough I live right next door.”
“You can move out any time.” Cam laughs.
“Psh!” Chase waves off his brother’s comment and takes a bite of food.
“So, when is this bachelor party taking place?” I ask what I hope is a safe question.
“Friday.” Cam leans back in his chair and gives Jill a wink. “So there will be no debauchery. I intend to show up sober and well-rested when I marry my
