“I’m going to shower.”
He’s looking at me a little weirdly, knowing I already showered this morning, but he just smiles at me as I walk away.
The truth is I need time on my own.
Time to think.
Time to worry.
And time to cry.
I’ve been holding it in for hours now, and I don’t want to share it with Kurt.
This is something I need to deal with on my own.
The hot water is beating down on my back, and I lean my hand up in the air against the tiles, my head hanging. It’s all pouring out.
Fear.
Anxiety.
Sadness.
Hurt.
All of it is trapped inside me with nowhere to go.
What if they find my parents, or hurt someone in Kurt’s family? Worse still, Kurt.
I’m not in fear for my own life anymore. Dying can’t be any worse than the hell they have had me in over the last four years. But there has been enough death around me already, I can’t handle there being another person dead because of me.
Sliding down onto the floor of the shower, I curl my knees up to my chest.
I let go. Really let go.
I let the sound of the running water mask my sobbing.
Maybe if I can let it all out, then tomorrow, I can stand up on that stand and fight for the Warringtons, so their deaths are not forgotten, and the bastards pay for it.
The more I cry, the more I realize what is important.
Tomorrow, I need to get up and fight for the life that should be important to me.
My own.
KURT
I know she needs this but standing outside the bathroom door and listening to Asha sobbing is soul crushing.
My instinct is to solve everything for her, protect her from life, but I know I can’t.
More importantly, Asha doesn’t want me to.
I can’t squash her identity by being overprotective, which is the hardest thing for me to do right now.
The sobs are getting louder, and my restraint is done. My hand on the handle, I’m about to open the door when my phone starts vibrating in my pocket.
I’m torn. I want to go to her, but I know this will be important and what I need to do for her.
This whole thing is for her.
Pressing the answer button, Ghost’s voice is talking before I can even say a word.
“We got him. We fucking got him.”
“What?” My mind snaps to Ghost’s voice and away from the sadness in the bathroom.
“The gardener, Joseph Patroni, has recently been taking money from Oscar, and prior to that was a large deposit in his account a week before the Warringtons were murdered. It came from a certain drug lord’s bullshit import company. He must have been the one to get the killers inside the gate that night and past the security cameras. Oscar must have found him and paid him off to join his team with some fucked-up story that he would keep him out of it if he took out Asha.”
“Are you fucking kidding me? He’s been working for both sides of the syndicate’s plan and is still alive. He is one lucky fucker.” My heart is beating at such a rate that it feels like it wants to break out from my chest.
“Where is he?” I need to know.
“In police custody now. But he was in Chicago, living in some dump, lying in wait, I would say, until the court case and Asha comes out of hiding. But he underestimates how desperate I was to keep her safe. There’s nothing I can’t find, including rats in a sewer.”
I take a deep breath and process what he’s telling me. I want to run into the shower and tell Asha, but I can’t, because she never knew he was a threat in the first place. Some things are best left alone. Once this is all over, I will tell her, but I know right now she can’t handle much more.
“Thanks, man, I don’t know how the fuck you do it, but I’m sure glad you do. I owe you big time.”
“Yeah, and when this is done, you will be paying that debt with babysitting duty so I can take a certain person for a few days of ‘R n R’. Because you are the only one I will trust to do it. And when I get her there, I won’t be surfacing for days. So be prepared.”
“You can take a fucking month if you want, whatever it takes to say thank you.”
“Like you could handle that.”
“Buddy, I’ve learned I can handle anything in my life, and let’s just call it practice for what I’m longing for.”
“Famous last words. Don’t rush it, man. Just enjoy Asha’s freedom first.” Ghost laughs at me, and I know he’s right, but it’s all I can think about, our future.
Together, a family and big sassy dog, living the dream.
We talk through the logistics of tomorrow again, like we haven’t done it a thousand times already, but the more we go over it, the less chance something will get missed.
As I end the call, I hear the shower turning off.
I take a seat on the couch and turn on the television to make it look like I haven’t been listening all along. Eventually I hear her moving around in the bedroom getting dressed.
One more day, baby, and the ending is near.
Last night was hard for both of us.
But the sun has risen, and we are waiting for the car to arrive. Ghost has arranged for extra security on top of the WITSEC guys who are supposed to be guarding her. Hawk is leading the team, so I know he will be all over this.
My phone alerts me that Hawk is on his way up to get us.
Asha has been pacing for a while now. I’m letting her be. You can’t contain that amount of nervous energy, and I’d be
