I stuck my finger into my mouth and felt along the inside of my aching cheek. I hissed as the tip of my finger ran over a tiny, torn piece of flesh. When Owen punched me, the contact caused a tooth to slightly cut my cheek. It stung but it didn’t hurt anywhere close to how much my jaw pained me. I removed my finger then turned on the tap, bent down and filled my mouth up with water. I swished it around then spat it out.
I wiped my hands down on a hand towel, folded it neatly back in place and made sure all of the blood was gone from the sink before I turned the tap off. If I left a mess, the Days would tear my arse up. Those two were so full of anger and misery I always did what I could to avoid being a target but there were days, like today, that I couldn’t avoid their wrath. I didn’t get them. I mean, I knew why they fostered kids, for the money. I just didn’t get why they even bothered because it was as obvious as the day was long that they hated it. They hated me and they always had. I had known since I came to the Day household that I was never going to be part of their family. I had to refer to Owen and Freda by their names and never Mum and Dad. The first time I tried this, when I was five, I got my arse walloped until I could barely walk from the pain.
I made sure to never make that mistake ever again.
I was the first placement Owen and Freda ever had and I was the only foster kid to come into their household who was never adopted by a family. I was a long-term placement, not short-term like the kids who passed through. I had visits with families who seemed like they were too good to be true, happy and loving but not willing to take in a boy who couldn’t express joy like that. I always figured part of me was broken and wasn’t good enough to be with a real family, so I accepted the only one I would ever know would be with the Days.
I left the Day household on Trinity Street without a sound and made my way towards Cumberland Road, where May Acton, my best friend, lived. My other mate, Hayes Hurley, lived on Stradbroke Road and we always met up with one another at Cumberland Road to wait at the school bus stop. I made it to the stop five minutes earlier than usual. I adjusted my uniform so it didn’t look creased or out of place. I was listening to my headphones, like always. Music was my solace, my haven, my idea of what heaven was like because when I listened to it, I felt the lyrics, the riffs, the kick and snares of the drums. I felt them all.
I loved music.
I sighed and switched off my MP3 player, wrapped my headphones around it and put it into my bag so I could think. I quickly devised a story in my head about how I was getting a pan from the top cupboard in the kitchen and it fell and hit me in the face. It sucked not telling my friends the truth, but I knew if I did they would tell their parents who would call the police who would contact my caseworker. I hated the Days, I didn’t want to be within a hundred metres of them, but leaving their house meant leaving Southwold to be placed with another family and I didn’t want that. The thought of moving away from the only place I’ve ever known on top of leaving my only friends made me feel sick.
I just had to stick it out for four years, three-hundred and sixty-four days more.
“Then I’ll be eighteen and free,” I mumbled to myself.
“Risk! Orrite, boy?”
I snorted as May jogged up the road and bumped his fist against mine when he reached my side. May was the happiest lad I had ever known, he always had a smile on his chubby face. He paused next to me and tried to catch his breath. He was breathing pretty heavily. May was overweight by a few stone and he wasn’t all that fit so the littlest of exertions left him breathless. I waited, as I always did, for him to be comfortable before we started talking.
“Mate,” he said, shaking his head and placing his hands on his wide hips. “I need to shift a few stone. My mum joined Slimming World last week and some of the dishes she made are super healthy and tasty as fuck. She said I can follow along with her plan too. I don’t even care if you or Hayes rip me a new one.”
This made me happy and not because I wanted to take the piss out of him.
“Good for you, mate. Soon you’ll be able to come running with me.”
“Ha!” May barked. “You run in the morning and at night like a fitness junkie, no thanks.”
I wasn’t a fitness junkie, not by a long stretch. I couldn’t afford to lose any weight, but I still went running twice a day just so I could get out of the Days’ house. They didn’t starve me, but they only fed me three meals a day because that was all the human body needed, Owen said. Most of the time, I didn’t even jog when I went out. I just wandered around until it was close to my curfew so I could go back to the house I lived in and go straight to sleep.
“We can walk too,” I pointed out to May. “That’s still good exercise.”
“Yeah, I suppose you’re ri— boy! What
