I saw the markings of unspeakable pain and loss etched on Amelia’s face. It was like gravity’s weight on her had increased tenfold in the last three minutes. “I’m feeling so anxious,” she said to Lucia. “Please forgive me.”
“You don’t know him. You really don’t.” Lucia had no need to convince Amelia of Ron’s character. But I could tell that she wanted to. The disparaging statements about Ron were painful to her.
“Please give yourself a few days,” Amelia said. “To weigh all the information you have.”
Lucia nodded reluctantly, but we all knew which way this was going.
While Amelia called a car for Lucia and walked her outside, I found my coat and boots. I felt that it would be in my best interest to leave quickly.
As I was on my way out the door, Amelia stopped me. “Stay for a minute, Delta.” She reached for my hand with cold fingers and a searching look in her eyes.
I followed her to the back of the house and sat down across from her at the dining table. She leaned toward me so she could speak quietly and still be heard, though we were alone in the house. “I offered Ron money to give up the baby.”
This was beyond what I’d expected, but I was nevertheless impressed and strangely proud. I admired her audacity.
“When did you talk to him?” I asked.
She spoke in a small, tight voice. “I went to Lucia’s house last week. Ron was there.”
Itzhak moaned lightly and repositioned himself on the hardwood floor.
“Did she hear you?”
“She was out of the room.”
“Well, let’s see.…” I didn’t want Amelia to end up in jail, nor did I want a PR scandal. At the same time, I didn’t believe it would be constructive to criticize her for actions already taken.
Her eyes filled with tears. “Ron is … everything you wouldn’t want for your daughter … opportunistic, dull, arrogant, lazy … it would be a mother’s deepest heartache to see a daughter with a man like him. And Lucia’s mother, her pain, her pain, I can’t imagine, to see it all unfolding before her eyes. The potential death of her daughter’s future.”
“But the baby, then … Your baby would be biologically related to Ron. Would that concern you?”
“You think I don’t know that?” Her words and saliva came toward me all at once.
I was surprised by the fury in her voice. It was an indication of her instability. Her madness.
“Yes,” she said. “There is risk in adoption.”
“I didn’t mean…”
“That loser is not sticking around to raise the child.” She pushed her hair behind her ears. “And Lucia’s an idiot. Because she thinks he is. He wants to get laid and he wants to tell his loser friends he has a kid, because that’s proof he got laid. Proof of his manhood.”
“But if that’s her decision…” I tried to point out the obvious, hoping she’d recognize that the path of Lucia was closed.
“You think I don’t see that I have nothing? No power and nothing. I get it, Delta. I get it.”
From my point of view, Amelia had limitless power. I thought about possible responses that wouldn’t anger her. “I think you could fix the situation, if you want to.”
“It’s too late.” She looked down and ran her thumb through the grooves in the antique farmhouse table.
“What did you say to him?” I tried to modulate my voice so it wouldn’t sound at all critical.
“That I would be happy to loan him fifty thousand.” Her eyes remained glued to the table.
“Loan?” I was relieved to hear the word loan. How could you go to jail for loaning money to someone?
“Yes, but I think he knew. That the ‘loan’ … it was conditional and euphemistic. He’s not the brightest bulb, but he probably understands that much.”
“Does Fritz know?”
Amelia rubbed a water-ring stain on the table with her finger, as if she might be able to remove it. “Well, I already talked about her tuition and other kinds of expenses.”
“You could say—”
Amelia began to cry. “Whatever I say … it’s not going to make a difference. She wants to keep the baby. She hates me.”
I walked around the table to where she was sitting and put my arms around her shoulders. “It’s OK, Amelia. It’s going to be OK. She doesn’t hate you. Let’s just wait to see what happens.”
Amelia continued to cry.
“It may be all right.”
CHAPTER TWELVE
It was clear that Lucia wanted to keep her baby. But it was hard to judge how greedy Ron was. On the off chance that Lucia and Ron came back, Lucia needed to know that Amelia had tried to bribe Ron. I felt mild guilt about my plan, but any child of Ron’s was likely to have long-term problems, with potential addiction issues, and make the Straubs miserable eventually.
I woke up on Thursday morning, drank two cups of coffee, and called Lucia. She sounded surprised to hear my voice.
“Amelia feels bad,” I said. “She said things she didn’t mean.”
“It’s OK.” Lucia spoke with finality, as if hoping to get off the phone quickly.
“She feels bad about both conversations.” I attempted a somber tone when I said the word both that would imply something untoward.
“Both?”
“The one at your house too.”
“Yes?” She sounded confused.
“You know…” I paused for four seconds. “That she had the conversation with Ron when you weren’t in the room. I mean, she knew he’d talk to you about it later. It wasn’t like she was trying to hide anything. It’s just … she doesn’t want you to think she was offering to pay Ron for the baby.”
There were a few seconds of silence.
“Excuse me?” Lucia’s voice came through the phone receiver clipped and high.
“Well … the fifty thousand…” I paused again. “It was a loan.”
“What are you talking about?” For the first time, I heard an edge in Lucia’s voice.
“She wasn’t offering to pay Ron for the baby,” I said.
I heard her breath come through the receiver. “Don’t call me again,” she said in a low,
