Henry IV, Part II

thyself and the money too. Thou didst swear to me upon a parcel-gilt goblet, sitting in my Dolphin-chamber, at the round table, by a sea-coal fire, upon Wednesday in Wheeson week, when the prince broke thy head for liking his father to a singing-man of Windsor, thou didst swear to me then, as I was washing thy wound, to marry me and make me my lady thy wife. Canst thou deny it? Did not goodwife Keech, the butcher’s wife, come in then and call me gossip Quickly? coming in to borrow a mess of vinegar; telling us she had a good dish of prawns; whereby thou didst desire to eat some; whereby I told thee they were ill for a green wound? And didst thou not, when she was gone down stairs, desire me to be no more so familiarity with such poor people; saying that ere long they should call me madam? And didst thou not kiss me and bid me fetch thee thirty shillings? I put thee now to thy book-oath: deny it, if thou canst. Falstaff My lord, this is a poor mad soul; and she says up and down the town that the eldest son is like you: she hath been in good case, and the truth is, poverty hath distracted her. But for these foolish officers, I beseech you I may have redress against them. Chief-Justice Sir John, Sir John, I am well acquainted with your manner of wrenching the true cause the false way. It is not a confident brow, nor the throng of words that come with such more than impudent sauciness from you, can thrust me from a level consideration: you have, as it appears to me, practised upon the easy-yielding spirit of this woman, and made her serve your uses both in purse and in person. Hostess Yea, in truth, my lord. Chief-Justice Pray thee, peace. Pay her the debt you owe her, and unpay the villany you have done her: the one you may do with sterling money, and the other with current repentance. Falstaff My lord, I will not undergo this sneap without reply. You call honourable boldness impudent sauciness: if a man will make courtesy and say nothing, he is virtuous: no, my lord, my humble duty remembered, I will not be your suitor. I say to you, I do desire deliverance from these officers, being upon hasty employment in the king’s affairs. Chief-Justice You speak as having power to do wrong: but answer in the effect of your reputation, and satisfy this poor woman. Falstaff Come hither, hostess. Enter Gower. Chief-Justice Now, Master Gower, what news? Gower

The king, my lord, and Harry Prince of Wales
Are near at hand: the rest the paper tells.

Falstaff As I am a gentleman. Hostess Faith, you said so before. Falstaff As I am a gentleman. Come, no more words of it. Hostess By this heavenly ground I tread on, I must be fain to pawn both my plate and the tapestry of my dining-chambers. Falstaff Glasses, glasses, is the only drinking: and for thy walls, a pretty slight drollery, or the story of the Prodigal, or the German hunting in water-work, is worth a thousand of these bed-hangings and these fly-bitten tapestries. Let it be ten pound, if thou canst. Come, an ’twere not for thy humours, there’s not a better wench in England. Go, wash thy face, and draw the action. Come, thou must not be in this humour with me; dost not know me? come, come, I know thou wast set on to this. Hostess Pray thee, Sir John, let it be but twenty nobles: i’ faith, I am loath to pawn my plate, so God save me, la! Falstaff Let it alone; I’ll make other shift: you’ll be a fool still. Hostess Well, you shall have it, though I pawn my gown. I hope you’ll come to supper. You’ll pay me all together? Falstaff Will I live? To Bardolph. Go, with her, with her; hook on, hook on. Hostess Will you have Doll Tearsheet meet you at supper? Falstaff No more words; let’s have her. Exeunt Hostess, Bardolph, Officers and Boy. Chief-Justice I have heard better news. Falstaff What’s the news, my lord? Chief-Justice Where lay the king last night? Gower At Basingstoke, my lord. Falstaff I hope, my lord, all’s well: what is the news, my lord? Chief-Justice Come all his forces back? Gower

No; fifteen hundred foot, five hundred horse,
Are march’d up to my lord of Lancaster,
Against Northumberland and the Archbishop.

Falstaff Comes the king back from Wales, my noble lord? Chief-Justice

You shall have letters of me presently:
Come, go along with me, good Master Gower.

Falstaff My lord! Chief-Justice What’s the matter? Falstaff Master Gower, shall I entreat you with me to dinner? Gower I must wait upon my good lord here; I thank you, good Sir John. Chief-Justice Sir John, you loiter here too long, being you are to take soldiers up in counties as you go. Falstaff Will you sup with me, Master Gower? Chief-Justice What foolish master taught you these manners, Sir John? Falstaff Master Gower, if they become me not, he was a fool that taught them me. This is the right fencing grace, my lord; tap for tap, and so part fair. Chief-Justice Now the Lord lighten thee! thou art a great fool. Exeunt.

Scene II

London. Another street.

	Enter Prince Henry and Poins.
Prince	Before God, I am exceeding weary.
Poins	Is’t come to that? I had thought weariness durst not have attached one of so high blood.
Prince	Faith, it does me; though it discolours the complexion of my greatness to acknowledge it. Doth it not show vilely in me to desire small beer?
Poins	Why, a prince should not be so loosely studied as to remember so weak a composition.
Prince	Belike then my appetite was not princely got; for, by my troth, I do now remember the poor creature, small beer. But, indeed, these humble considerations make me out of love with my greatness. What a disgrace is it to me to remember thy name! or to know thy face to-morrow! or to take