Parnassus on Wheels

I thought of my “anthology” of loaves of bread and vowed to bake a million more if Roger wanted me to. It was after supper time when we got to Greenbriar. Roger had suggested that we take a shorter road that would have brought us through to Redfield sooner, but I begged him to go by way of Shelby and Greenbriar, just as we had come before. I did not tell him why I wanted this. And when finally we came to a halt in front of Kirby’s store at the crossroads it was raining heavily and we were ready for a rest.

“Well, sweetheart,” said Roger, “shall we go and see what sort of rooms the hotel has?”

“I can think of something better than that,” said I. “Let’s go up to Mr. Kane and have him marry us. Then we can get back to Sabine Farm afterward, and give Andrew a surprise.”

“By the bones of Hymen!” said Roger. “You’re right!”

It must have been ten o’clock when we turned in at the red gate of Sabine Farm. The rain had stopped, but the wheels sloshed through mud and water at every turn. The light was burning in the sitting room, and through the window I could see Andrew bent over his work table. We climbed out, stiff and sore from the long ride. I saw Roger’s face set in a comical blend of sternness and humour.

“Well, here goes to surprise the Sage!” he whispered.

We picked our way between puddles and rapped on the door. Andrew appeared, carrying the lamp in one hand. When he saw us he grunted.

“Let me introduce my wife,” said Roger.

“Well, I’ll be damned,” said Andrew.

But Andrew isn’t quite so black as I’ve painted him. When he’s once convinced of the error of his ways, he is almost pathetically eager to make up. I remember only one remark in the subsequent conversation, because I was so appalled by the state of everything at Sabine Farm that I immediately set about putting the house to rights. The two men, however, as soon as Parnassus was housed in the barn and the animals under cover, sat down by the stove to talk things over.

“I tell you what,” said Andrew⁠—“do whatever you like with your wife; she’s too much for me. But I’d like to buy that Parnassus.”

“Not on your life!” said the Professor.

Colophon

Parnassus on Wheels
was published in 1917 by
Christopher Morley.

This ebook was produced for
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The cover page is adapted from
A Cowherd at Valhermeil, Auvers-sur-Oise,
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