“Well, I didn’t have no fancy comb at the camp. But you wouldn’t know about living in a lice-, flea-, and rat-invested camp.”
Capp put his Stetson back on his head. “Look Josie, I got a meeting. Anything else you want to tell me?”
“Yeah. One more thing.”
“What is it?”
“I don’t love you no more. I don’t feel for you,” Josie said through her tears.
Capp nodded his head, tipped his hat and walked out the door. Walking down the cabin’s steps, a feeling of relief began to settle in, then unexpectedly a twinge of guilt found its way into his consciousness.
A few weeks later Josie rested in her new bed in the servants’ wing of the ranch house. She was propped up on her pillows as Maizie read from The Velveteen Rabbit, a children’s book. Josie, sporting a new red-print head rag, listened with her heart. Maizie’s reading was like a soothing hug, a thoughtful prayer. Josie was feeling so much better now—healed, clean, and getting stronger.
“Maizie, please read the part about what happens when you are loved,” said Josie. Maizie turned to the lines that Josie found so comforting. She read the words again. Josie listened.
“‘When a child loves you for a long, long time, not just to play with, but really loves you, then you become real.’”
“Maizie?” Josie interrupted.
“Yes, Josie?”
“Do you think someone could ever love me for a long, long time?”
“I do.”
“Do you think a man could love me?”
“Yes, of course.”
“I don’t have no one who loves me, never did.”
“Me and Sugar and Ol’ Jon, we all care for you. That’s a form of love.”
“Yes, but what about a man? I’m soiled and scarred. I had it all wrong, how to get along.”
“Your scars don’t show.”
“I can’t have no children either.”
“Not everyone can have children, but that won’t keep someone from loving you.”
“Maizie, did it happen for you? Do you feel loved?”
“Now, that’s a good question. My mama did love me, but do you know about guardian angels?” asked Maizie. “I’m not talking about angels in the sky. I’m talking about angels that walk on earth, real people.”
“No, can’t say I do.”
“I have lots of guardian angels. They help me. They make good things happen.”
“I never had none.”
“You got to look for them, Josie. When something good happens, look around. It’s the guardian angel doing it.” Josie was quiet for a while and then her eyes opened wide.
“Leon? He was the one who found me.”
“Yep, he’s one. Now you keep Leon in your heart. It helps to fill those empty spaces.”
“Sugar, Ol’ Jon, you? Are you all guardian angels?”
“Yes, that’s what my mama taught me, but you have to believe it. Helped me through rough times, thinking I had guardian angels. Made me feel loved somehow. Taught me to be grateful.”
Josie relaxed and looked up to the ceiling and closed her eyes. Maizie, softly smiling, resumed her reading.
Chapter 84
Man Talk
Capp looked at the sun and figured it was nearing time to climb up the hill to the ranch house. He couldn’t imagine why James wanted to speak with him privately. Worried that maybe his work on the track didn’t please his employer, Capp’s steps felt heavier than usual. He figured he was doing a good job overall, but he didn’t know if his jockey and horse training was good enough. The thought made him nervous.
When Capp arrived at the ranch house, he was shown to the small table on the porch looking down on the backside. Leon invited Capp to sit. “Would you like a glass of beer, mon ami? Philippe and I made a batch of stout. C’est bon!”
“Could use a beer. Thanks.” Capp pulled out his chair and appeared deep in thought as he took his seat. Adjusting his collar and brushing a piece of lint off his chest, he waited.
When James approached the small table, Capp immediately stood and shook his hand.
“Capp, thank you for coming. You are probably wondering why I called you up here.”
“Yeah, I… ah… I thought maybe you were…” Capp wiped his sweaty palm on his pants and sat back down.
“I want to talk to you about Maizie, but that isn’t where I’ll start,” interrupted James. Capp felt his stomach tighten.
“Capp, I sent you to Louisville to get an education. I hoped you’d glean every bit of knowledge you could.” Capp remained silent and now more nervous than ever. James continued: “It seems you did just that.” Capp felt his mood and body lighten. “Your dad showed me your journal. I was impressed with your notes. And the work you’re doing with the riders and the thoroughbreds looks good to Wil, so…”
Capp’s shoulders relaxed completely and he interrupted James. “Thanks, I’m feelin’ confident. Appreciate you trustin’ me.”
“There is one thing. I heard rumors when we were in Louisville.”
“Rumors?”
“Yes, that you were involved with Tilly Coombs before you left for Arkansas, but that it ended badly.”
“I broke off with her. Made it real clear.”
“I see.” Leon arrived with two cold stouts and two plates of salad. James picked up his fork.
“Anything else for now, monsieur?” asked Leon.
“No, thank you, Leon,” replied James and took a quick bite of salad and a sip of beer. “So, if Tilly Coombs is out of the picture, where are you with Maizie?”
“Where? With Maizie?”
“Yes, are you serious about her?”
“Oh,” Capp scratched his head. “I’m not sure.”
“I think a lot of men your age get confused about love.”
“Yeah, so I ain’t so sure where I am with Maizie. How do you know you are in love?”
James remained silent and continued eating as Capp gathered his thoughts and said, “You know, I see how you treat Mrs. Glidewell. How you respect her. I never had feelings like that for anybody. Girls were just fun, I thought. Tilly got like she owned me. And I didn’t want her in the same way. I was probably mean, but I didn’t know how to handle it. I just did what Bob Hench
