“Of course I am.” He let her hand go. “He talks so easily. He is charismatic and intelligent. And he is adept at this world; he may even be capable of saving it. Looking at him is like looking at an exhibition of my inadequacies. And I wish I were handling it more graciously than I am.”
Clare crept closer and wrapped her arms around him. She rested her head against his shoulder, trying to spread some comfort to him through touch. “You have so many strengths of your own. If I had to pick someone to cross the country with, I’d choose you every time.”
“You are kind.”
“I’m honest.”
Dorran chuckled and kissed the top of her head. He rested there for a moment, and Clare listened to his heartbeat, steady and reliable.
“What do you want to do?” Dorran asked. “About this USB drive and the research institute.”
It wasn’t an easy question. Clare pressed her eyes shut. “I know where Evandale is. But I’ve never visited it. It would be a long drive.”
“Longer than what we’ve already crossed?”
“Yeah.”
Dorran’s finger grazed Clare’s cheek, brushing stray hair behind her ear. “How do you feel about his other suggestion, that we pass the drive to another traveller?”
“I mean… we could probably find someone eventually, but…”
He nodded, but Clare had the sense he wished he didn’t agree. “It feels negligent.”
“It doesn’t seem right to carry the answer to the world’s problems in our pocket and not do everything we could to get it to Evandale. We could pass it to another survivor, but it might take days to find someone, and they probably wouldn’t want the responsibility any more than we do.”
“He still believes other people may come to the tower. But his signal has been broadcasting for weeks, and we are the first to find him. How long would he wait for another traveller?”
The door beeped. Clare jolted and looked over her shoulder. Peter had returned, beaming as he carried two thick bathrobes. “Good news. The social media company two floors below us was also in the habit of spending nights in the tower. And apparently, they were accustomed to luxury. I even found an unopened pack of toothbrushes.”
“Oh, now that’s some good news.” Clare took the bundle of items from him.
“You remember where the bathrooms are, right? Just across the hall.” Peter was already backing towards the desk with his laptop. “Otherwise, make yourselves comfortable here. I’m going to try to get ahead on my work. Meeting the pair of you has restored some enthusiasm, so I hope you won’t think I’m too rude if I take advantage of it.”
“Of course not. Do you need quiet while you work?”
“No, not at all.” He laughed. “I’m used to being in a room full of people. It might actually help me Zen into it if I have some background noise. Help yourself to dinner, such as it is. I’ll be right here if you need anything.”
He sank into the desk seat and pulled the laptop an inch closer. Clare watched curiously. A change passed over Peter as he began to work. He opened a chart filled with numbers and fractions, and within seconds, the animated smile faded into tight-lipped focus. His eyes developed a glaze as he tapped at numbers. Clare had the impression that he’d tuned them out. It was fascinating, if a little unsettling.
She crossed to the window and nudged the blinds back. The sky was hidden by clouds, but Clare guessed it had to be night. The storm hadn’t lost any of its ferocity. When she pressed close to the glass and angled her chin down, she could make out the edge of the horde assaulting the building. Very little of them were visible between the dark sky and heavy clouds. But occasionally, she saw distant glints as they tilted their heads back at the perfect angle to catch some of the window’s light on their eyes.
Chapter Forty-Nine
She let the blinds fall back into place. Dorran stood by the chairs, watching her. She tried to shake off her uneasiness as she crossed to him. “I could do with a shower. How about you?”
“Mm. Very much.”
Clare led the way, weaving between the desks to reach the hallway and the bathrooms. They took turns using the shower. Helexis’s amenities were vastly more spacious than the riverboat’s, but the water heater had been turned off as part of Peter’s efforts to conserve fuel. Clare stayed in the freezing water just long enough to rinse the shampoo out of her hair, then she rushed through the towel-drying to get the dressing gown around herself. She was still shivering when she stepped into the main part of the bathroom, where Dorran had finished brushing his teeth. He swept her into a chair, pushed the bath mat under her feet, and grabbed a fresh towel to dry her hair for her.
“I miss Winterbourne’s fireplaces.” Clare, teeth chattering, clutched the dressing gown’s lapels as Dorran squeezed moisture out of her hair.
He chuckled. “It had some attractive features.”
“Do you miss it?”
She watched his expression in the mirror. He took a breath but didn’t speak immediately, instead keeping his eyes focussed on her hair as he combed it. “Sometimes. A little.”
“You grew up there. It’s normal to be homesick. Especially when the outside world is so much different to what you’re used to.”
“Do you miss your home?”
Clare still thought of her cottage occasionally, though it encroached on her thoughts less and less frequently with each passing day. She lifted her shoulders in a shrug then let them drop. “I miss what it represents. My old life, where I could sit in the garden when it was sunny and wave to the elderly couple across the street when they went out for walks and buy a new book each Friday then try to find somewhere to fit it on my bookshelf. But I wouldn’t want to go back there.”
“No?”
“I
