We stayed like that for a few moments as my body adjusted to him. Tears leaked from my eyes and he kissed them away. “I’m ok.” I sniffed. He pulled back, and slowly moved forward. It hurt less this time, and when he did it again, even less. I didn’t get the same feeling that I did in the tub. I couldn’t feel my body building up to anything. Mostly it was a dull pain now, and I wondered if something was wrong with me.
Caleb began to move faster, and without my protests it was as if he was striving to reach something. His hips moved faster, and then he paused, teeth gritted, muscles tensed. His head dropped between his shoulders as his breathing slowed. “It’ll be better next time. I promise.” He panted as he slowly climbed off of me.
I laid there on the bed as he went to the bathroom to dispose of the condom. I stared at the ceiling thinking about what had just happened. Was I supposed to be happy right now? Was I supposed to want to do it again? All I knew was that I was tired and confused. I’d heard that the more you do it, the better it feels, but I wasn’t so sure at the moment. I was sore, and the idea of doing it again made the pain worse.
When Caleb reappeared, he was carrying something. “This will help,” he promised as he pressed a cool washcloth between my legs. I jumped at first. It stung, but he was right. After a few minutes I started feeling some relief. I laid there as he tenderly cleaned me up, and then after tossing the cloth in the bathroom, he pulled back the covers on the bed.
We snuggled together, and the last thing I remember was him telling me goodnight and kissing me. In the early part of sleep, when you feel like you’re in a dream, I heard the whispered words, “I love you.” Funny thing is, I don’t know if I was dreaming or not.
Chapter 22Riley
Morning came sooner than I was wanting, and when the sunlight peeked through the curtains hitting my face, I attempted to turn away. Caleb was curled around me, and one arm was practically pinning me in place. “Uhhh.” I groaned as I began inching myself toward the edge of the bed. I needed to use the bathroom, and the pain from last night was a dull ache. Caleb grumbled sleepily as he shifted on the bed. His arm fell to his side allowing me an escape.
I tip toed to the bathroom, not wanting to wake him. I wasn’t so sure I was ready for more of last night, and I wasn’t sure of how to explain that either. After relieving myself, I shuffled over to my bag to search for a tee. The whole ‘being naked’ in front of guy was new for me, and I felt over exposed this morning. When it’s dark, or you’re too tired to notice, it’s different.
“Morning looks good on you.” Caleb’s sleepy voice murmured from where he was still lying on the bed. I jumped as my hand hit soft cotton, and I fumbled to cover myself.
“I look terrible.” I yawned as I stood, tugged the shirt over me, and waited awkwardly for what was next. I hadn’t washed my face last night, so I knew I had smeared makeup and my hair was a mess.
“Come here.” Caleb tossed the covers back and moved to the center of the bed. The idea of going back to sleep sounded heavenly, but what I really wanted to do was go home. I knew the faster we got moving, the faster that would happen.
I made my way over to him, and sat perched on the edge. “I was thinking we could leave today.” My voice cracked. I don’t know why I was worried, but something told me that Caleb might want to stay.
“I was thinking the same thing. I’m sure your parents are missing you too. School starts in a few weeks.” He sat up, pecked my cheek, and grinned.
“I don’t want to think about any of that.” I groaned. The idea of facing my parents in a few days made me sick to my stomach. They were going to be so mad at me, and I don’t want to think about how much I’ve hurt my dad over all of this.
Caleb’s smile dropped as seriousness washed over his face. “How are you feeling today?”
“I’m fine.” I lied.
“Riley.” He shook his head before staring at me right in the eyes. “Do you regret what we did?”
“What? No.” I started to stand up, but he grabbed my wrist to stop me. “I’m feeling a lot of things this morning, but regret isn’t one of them.” His grip softened and I pulled my hand free and cupped his cheek. “Last night was something I’ll always remember. I’m not sorry we had sex, and I’m glad it was with you, but right now I just want to get out of here.”
“I think I can help you with that.” He smiled. Give me a little time to shower and pack up. Order some breakfast if you want.” He pointed to the menu sitting on the nightstand.
“Sounds like a plan.” I smiled as he stood and walked toward the bathroom in all his naked glory. Is it bad that the first thing I thought was ‘how many times has he done this before?’
