While Andy blew her nose and dabbed at her eyes, Ashley’s sapphire gaze drifted over her shoulder to him. “I believe in guardian angels, Mrs. McClane,” she told his mom while she looked at him. “They’re as real as devils, only they show up when you need them the most. Be kind, Andy. Let Alex be kind, too. You get to give him a gift just by accepting his offer. Give him a hug next time you see him. Bet he’ll like that more than anything else.”
Tripp bowed his head, a smitten, but foolish, foolish man. If he were alone, he’d pull those panties out of his pocket and bury his nose in them. He licked his bottom lip, shocked at how hard his heart was thumping in his chest, like it wanted out of its cage, right damned now.
He shoved his chair back. “Mom, I, umm…” Have got to get the fuck out of here. “M-m-nom,” he choked. “Stay here. Talk to Doctor Smith. I’ll be right back. Just need a minute with… Ashley?” Tripp stretched out his hand, daring her to refuse him this time. “Please?” he begged, needing whatever the hell she had that made her tougher than anyone he’d ever met.
For God’s sake, every time she’d been knocked down, she’d gotten back up, and that was something to be damned proud of. She was that dog-tired boxer in the ring, the one nobody ever bet on. The one everyone, even her own parents, expected would lose. She was the long shot. The underdog. She’d been backed into corners all of her life. Bloodied and sweating and about to drop. About to give up. But here she was, still going strong. Stronger…
He’d known that same hopeless feeling, the panicky what-ifs that went with fighting the world. It was one hell of a desperate alone-time, when a person’s mettle was truly tested. When it had just been him against the odds. Those times were when he’d truly known what he was made of. When he’d had to pull every last ounce of resilience up from the deepest part of his gut to keep fighting, just to keep trying. To stand.
Yet Ashley had done that all her life, and she’d done it alone. She wasn’t a loser, by hell! She’d relentlessly fought on and fought back. She thought she was a coward? Guess again, little girl. This woman was a lot braver than some grown-assed men he’d served with.
Her tender analysis of Alex’s magnanimous gift had knocked Tripp right out of the ballpark. Sloppy tears perched on the rims of his eyelids, ready to drip down his damned face. This was another one of those alone, what-if times. Alex’s stepping up like he had was like someone taking a beating for Tripp. Someone purposefully stepping into the line of fire. Sure gave that old sniper saying, ‘From a place you’ll never see, will come a sound you’ll never hear,’ a different meaning. Because Tripp had never seen this coming.
“Please, take my hand,” he asked again. So I can stop embarrassing myself.
Silently, Ashley lifted to her feet and reached for him. Tripp grabbed onto her fingers like a drowning man grabbing onto a lifeline and pulled her into the hall. Like a man gone crazy, he pinned her against the wall the second the door closed behind them. “You,” he groaned into her surprised mouth. “I want you. Only you.”
He kissed her hard, grinding his lips into hers, breaching her mouth with his tongue, spearing her the way her words had just speared his heart. He’d always thought he knew so much, but he didn’t, not really. Sure as hell not about what mattered most.
Thrumming with worry, Tripp ran both hands over Ashley’s shoulders and down her arms, then back up again, needing to absorb this woman. If only he could. He cupped her delicate jaw between his big, rough hands. Hands that had dealt out death and justice wherever he’d served. Yet not once had he accomplished what she just had. Not once had he seen through all the crap in life, to the heart of it, the real reason for living and fighting. It wasn’t about serving justice or revenge. It surely wasn’t about making people pay for their mistakes. Life was about giving back. It was about service and pure, simple love. Which, apparently, his badassed boss understood a helluva lot better than he did.
“Ashley,” Tripp breathed into her mouth. “I’m sorry. You’re right. God, you’re so much braver than me.”
“I am?” she mumbled around his lips.
“I am such an idiot.” Tripp couldn’t hold back the passion storming his soul. But he didn’t want her to see him crying, either. So he hid it by kissing her.
“You are,” she whispered sweetly into his mouth. But then she bowed her head and told the floor, “I don’t know what to say anymore.”
But he did. “I love you, Ashley. I know it’s crazy, it doesn’t make any sense, and it’s too soon, but—”
“You’re emotional right now. You’re overwhelmed. You don’t know what you’re saying.”
Damn it, she’d just tossed his words back at him. Tripp knew he was losing ground. “Yes, I do. I knew it last Friday. B-b-but it was happening so fast. Too soon. I mean…”
Shit, damn, and son of a bitch! He couldn’t believe how badly he was screwing this up. But the thought of losing her, along with the weight of Alex’s enormous gift, and what Trish’s critical condition was doing to his poor mother... God! Ashley was right. Everything
