“I've been terrified of men for the better part of ten years,” she confessed hoarsely, making his heart clench with sympathy. “Yet here I am, surrounded by strange men, and I feel more at home here than anywhere else I've ever been. I don't understand why, but I do know it's because of you.
“Without speaking to me about it, you noticed my favorite color is blue, that I only use facial products from Eminence, that I like Hask Orchid flavored shampoo, and Suavecito pomade.
“You noticed Elka likes big chunks of sweet potatoes and apples in her food, and that she needs an elevated stand to eat out of.
"You painted your goddamn basement white and put away your whips and chains so I wouldn't be afraid.
“I think about needing something, and I find it in my room the next time I go up. In our session, Dr. White pointed out that instead of grabbing onto Elka during our sessions to steady me and stay grounded, I was rubbing at this damn GPS tracking watch you gave me.
“I don't know you, but you make me feel safe, and it's probably because I came out of the most intense mental breakdown I've had in a long damn time, flying high on adrenaline, panic, and the certainty I was about to disappear into another black site or die, and I imprinted on you like a baby duck or something.”
Baby ducks were fragile and helpless.
Two adjectives he’d never in a million years associate with Dillon. No. She was a goddamn tigress, but apparently, she'd missed the memo.
Nasa listened to her rant out all the ways he'd treated her with kindness and consideration with extreme irritation.
He heard it in her voice how those small, thoughtful things touched her, and heard her fears that whatever she felt for him was the result of the traumatic experience Ghost created to ensure their meeting.
He understood how Dillon might think she was some damsel in distress he was invested in saving, but she'd saved herself before he'd even gotten to her.
Her survival instincts were honed to razor sharpness, and if Tobias hadn't been the one to walk up to her in that moment, Nasa was certain Dillon would have been fine.
“I don't know what to say that won't come across as me arguing with you that you're wrong and I'm right, but I'm not going to stop anticipating your needs or finding ways to make you more comfortable.
“If I can make life a little easier for you right now, I will, because I can and I want to. I definitely don't think you're a helpless baby duck, and the connection we have has nothing to do with what happened in Dallas.
“I get you're confused right now, and I'll be honest when I say I'm a little confused myself at how important you feel, but it doesn't feel wrong.
"You're not ready, so I'm going to give you whatever space you need to sort out what's bullshit and what's real. I won't push you to get intimate with me, but I'm not going to disappear. Okay?”
“Okay,” she murmured softly.
“Did your session with Collette help you? Or confuse you more?” he asked, needing to get a baseline on whether or not to expect this kind of emotional turmoil from Dillon after every session, or if today was just a particularly trying day.
Dillon gave another light sniffle, rubbing her cheek against his chest like a kitten seeking comfort and reassurance.
“Both. It was just a lot of information all at once, but I'll have time to process it all by my next appointment on Tuesday.”
“Did you cry in her office?” he murmured, keeping his mouth pressed against her skin to ensure each word was a kiss.
Dillon swallowed audibly, giving a subtle tip of her head to give him better access to her neck. “No. I didn't want to. I still don't. I... I'm afraid if I start, I won't stop.”
Nasa scowled because she couldn't see, truly understanding why she wasn't prepared to lose that much control, but all bottled up like she was, she needed some kind of release.
Despite knowing an orgasm always set him right, Nasa couldn't suggest sex, but he had a second favorite way to let off steam.
“How about burning through some bullets? Shredding a paper target always makes me feel better.”
After a brief pause, Dillon nodded. “I could do that.”
*****
When Nasa asked if she wanted to burn some bullets, Dillon hadn't anticipated what it would turn into.
After reluctantly letting her go, Nasa told her he had to set up the range and she should probably eat something.
So, while he went off and did his thing, Dillon made herself a smoothie.
She was in the process of cleaning up her mess when Ever and Athena came trooping in, both with huge tactical bags slung over their shoulders and eager smiles on their faces.
“Nasa invited us over to shred some targets!” Athena declared with great enthusiasm.
Ever gave a gleeful cackle and waved at Dillon to join them. “Nasa said you only had a few handguns with you, so me and Athena brought all our favorite toys.
"Ripley is finishing up at work and will join us in a little while. You're going to die when you see her kit. Spoiler alert: it's all pink.”
Irritated by the pair intruding on what Dillon had thought to be her decompression time, she reluctantly followed Ever into the dining room.
As soon as Ever unrolled her bag of goodies out on the table, Dillon forgot to be angry. Between the two redheads, there was enough weaponry to rob three banks.
Handguns, rifles, and knives. Oh, my!
“I'm pretty partial to my HK handguns, but Athena is a Glock girl,” Ever shared, pointing out the different options in their personal handgun preferences.
“And I just got this baby in a few days ago. I haven't tried it yet, but it's supposed to be specifically engineered to suit women.”
Dillon nodded, reaching out to reverently stroke her hand along the disassembled pieces.
“The Lady
