“That would have been the smart thing,” Nyssa mocked.
“We need to go find you a dress for banquet tomorrow,” Draven told Balandria.
“You’re not putting Balandria in a dress,” Aydra argued. “She’ll cut your throat.”
Balandria raised her glass to Aydra. “I knew I liked her,” she said to Draven.
Draven’s eyes narrowed down at Aydra. “What do you suggest instead?” he asked.
“I have something that would suit her better,” she replied. “You’ll just need to take it to my seamstress, Maye, to have it taken in, make it her own.” Her eyes flickered to Nyssa. “Can you take them? Make sure Maye doesn’t have any attitude for helping Venari?”
Nyssa nodded. “I can do that.”
“What will you do today?” Dorian asked Aydra as he started to stand.
Aydra paused a moment, eyes flickering to her plate. “Ah… I have been summoned to help Rhaif with choosing decorations for the celebration.”
Dorian’s brows raised at her across the table, apparent worry stretching over his features. “Is Lex going with you?” he asked.
“She is,” Aydra affirmed. “Speaking of which, I should really find her.”
CHAPTER FORTY-NINE
“I THINK YOU’RE being ridiculous,” Aydra argued with Rhaif hours later as they walked through the flower shops. “It’s a celebration. Not a wedding.”
“A wedding would stress me less,” Rhaif mumbled as he picked up another flower. “What about these?” he asked, holding up a long stem with a small black flower on the end.
She did a double-take at the flower he was twirling in his hand. “Where has that been all my life?” she muttered as she took it from his fingers.
“Figures,” he said under his breath.
She pressed the black flower to her nose and inhaled the scent of it, allowing it to fill her insides. “Figures what?” she dared ask, eyes flickering to Lex who was standing near.
“That you would be attracted to a noir flower.”
“Matches my core,” she muttered. She paused a moment and looked him over as he picked another flower from the next cart. “I honestly don’t think these people will care about whether the decorations of the Great Hall are blue, black, or pink. The only thing the Blackhands will care for is the food.”
“Which is why I’ve Dorian handling that,” Rhaif replied.
Aydra felt a smile rise on her lips, and she almost laughed. “Yes, he is the expert.”
The first smile she’d seen on Rhaif’s face in months met her own, and for a moment, she was reminded of the brother she’d once known.
The flash of a memory of them walking down that same street at the age of seventeen filled her mind. She could hear his laugh, feel his arm wrapped into hers. He’d bought her flowers and placed them in her hair that day.
But the memory of how that afternoon had ended made her heart constrict.
“I promise, it’s the last time,” he had sworn.
“You said that last month,” she had whispered.
“Drae, please.” His hand wrapped around her cheek, thumb stroking her lips. “You know I love you.” His lips kissed her hands, and her heart fell for the promise he whispered.
Aydra nearly vomited in the street as the angst of the memory making her stomach knot. The flash of his ashen face from two days before entered her mind, and she forced herself to straighten.
Rhaif turned away from her then and pushed his hands behind his back, and Aydra was glad she had not allowed such a memory to rest in her features.
“What about these?” he asked with an upwards nod towards a bouquet of burgundy flowers.
Aydra sighed as she paid for the stem in her hand, and then she turned to see the flowers he was looking at. “Whatever you want, Rhaif,” she said, feeling sadness fill her core. “I’m sure it will be beautiful whatever you choose.”
The ache stayed in her stomach throughout the day. Each time he would try and get her to speak with him normally, she found herself unable, and when night came, she did not join he and her siblings at supper.
She bid Lex goodnight, urging her to look after Nyssa the rest of the night instead of herself, and she then retired to the silence of her bedroom. She had not seen Draven or Balandria since the morning, not even a glimpse of them in the hall.
Being around Rhaif for so long that day and having to act as though they were as they’d always been in front of people had been overwhelming on her core. She’d kept her facade, pushed her pain to the back of her mind, forced herself to smile in front of he and their people.
So when the water of her bath wrapped around her that night, her heart broke, and she wept into the warmth of it.
Her core emptied to a numbing she’d never wanted to feel again, and soon she fell asleep in the water.
The dreams that filled her were of her own past.
The first being the day after Dorian and Nyssa were marked, together—two months before Rhaif had been given his own marking and fire.
“She doesn’t mean it,” Aydra managed as they stood atop the cliff they liked to go to.
Rhaif’s brows narrowed. “Doesn’t she?”
The bow sagged in her extended arms, and she stared sideways at him. “Rhaif—”
“Drae, she marked our youngers before me,” he cut her off. “Both of them. Together.”
She could see the frustration in his face, his tense arms as he tugged at his hair, pacing back and forth at the edge of the cliff.
