When I meet them by the stage, Dolly kisses both of my cheeks and then grabs at my hands. “We have to go celebrate. You in?” She beams with joy, her eyelashes wet with tears.
“Yes. Absolutely. I’m in.”
Three hours and two martinis later, I’m regurgitating stories about my sordid past that were better left on the inside.
“He basically used me for sex and I was too stupid and naïve to realize it.”
“You are not stupid.” Bee smacks me on the arm, using the hand holding her martini, which sloshes over the rim and onto me. “This Mark person is the dumbass in your situation.”
“Mark sounds like a Chad,” Dolly agrees. She changed into the original red dress before we left the theater.
I frown into my glass. “Who’s Chad?”
Bee waves a hand. “You know. Wears excessive amounts of cheap body spray, thinks only of himself, gives off a big ‘I look cool in fedoras’ energy.”
I nod. “That’s scarily accurate.” I eyeball the fish swimming lazily around in the tank suspended above the weathered dark wood bar.
We’re at Moby Dick’s, a nautical-themed gay bar. We’re sitting all in a row, me, Bee, Fifi, and Dolly.
“Mark isn’t the problem. I’m the problem. I don’t know what to do with my life and I keep trying to fit myself in places I don’t belong.”
And I miss Alex. When I allow myself to think about him.
Fifi rolls her eyes. “You’re like what, twelve? You’re a baby. You have all the time in the world.”
I snort into my glass. “Yep. All the time in the world.”
“Why is that funny?” Dolly asks.
“If I told you, you wouldn’t believe me.”
“Try us,” Fifi encourages.
“Fine.” What pops out of my mouth next can only be blamed on the martinis. And maybe the fact that I’m lonely. Even though I’ve been hanging out with Dolly and Bee and Fifi for a while now, living this Monday over and over is a solitary adventure. So I tell the truth, if only to feel less isolated for a brief moment. “I’m living the same day over and over again.”
Bee pops a cherry in her mouth from her martini and chews slowly before pointing the stem at me. “Baby, that’s my whole life.”
“No, I mean literally. I’m reliving this same day over and over. Every day I wake up to that song, the sprinkle me one.” I turn to Dolly. “Why do you do that anyway?”
Dolly purses bright red lips at me. “You just told us you’re living the same day over and over and this is what you’re concerned with? My musical choices?”
“I know it sounds delusional, but didn’t you think it was weird I happened to have a half-man, half-woman costume lying around?”
Dolly shrugs. “This is San Francisco.”
“True. But the fact that I had one that fits you?”
“That is implausible. However, this city has more drag queens per capita than any other part of the world. So not impossible.” She shrugs.
I frown. “So you don’t believe me?”
“I believe you, baby.” Queen Bee puts a hand over mine on the bar. “Even if we didn’t, what does it matter? It’s your truth and you shouldn’t be afraid to share it.”
“Thanks, Bee.” I sigh. “So? Dolly, why the sprinkle me song?”
She shrugs. “When I’m upset the only thing that snaps me out of it is old school gangster rap.”
“That’s gangster rap?”
Dolly clucks with disappointment and taps the bar in front of me with a cherry fingernail. “There will be no bad-mouthing E-40. He’s the founding member of the Click.”
I shrug and sip on my drink. Maybe I should slow down a little. My brain is getting fuzzy. “I have no idea what you’re talking about.”
Fifi rolls her eyes. “What you need to do with all this free time is work on your Bay Area musical education.”
Bee chimes in. “Baby, what you don’t know could fill this bar.”
I smile. “I know you’re all going to forget this since tomorrow will be today, again, but I really love you ladies.”
Dolly lifts her brows. “Honey, how much have you had to drink?”
“Not enough.” I take another sip.
Fifi laughs. “So tell us what happens on this Monday every day. Is it as boring as it sounds?”
I tap a finger on the edge of the martini glass. “I always wake up late. On days I show up at work, I get fired. Then I get dumped by Mark. Or, I used to. But now I avoid him.”
“Wait a minute,” Queen Bee interrupts. “Why not confront him? You should read his ass. You could tear him a new one every day, and you’re letting that opportunity go?”
Reading, Fifi patiently explains at my confused look, is what the queens call insulting, roasting, or throwing shame at someone. Then she lifts her glass. “The library is open.”
“Yeah, no.” I shake my head. “That’s not really my style.”
“You make your style. Listen to Queen Bee, baby, here’s what you do. You get dressed up. Looking all tight will build confidence, and then you slam his ass. Just keep it short and sweet. Tell him he’s so full of shit the toilet is jealous.”
Dolly smacks the table with a palm. “Ask him, how many licks until I get to the interesting part of this conversation?”
Fifi reaches over and taps my arm. “But no actual licking. Don’t forget to keep that tongue in your mouth.”
“Maybe I’ll try it tomorrow.” I blow out a breath. “If I go to work. I haven’t been going in lately.” I smile at Dolly. “I’m glad the costume I made helped. I’ll make sure you have it every day, even if I go into work, and even though you’re going to forget all of this. Which is why I’ll need it back when we get home so I can put it in the magic closet and you can use it again tomorrow.”
They are staring at me, eyes wide, mouths open.
Dolly is the first to pull it
