It clicked for me. I gritted my teeth, hating that Dantaleon was right. “So what you’re saying is that we should string her along.”
“I said no such thing. I am merely suggesting that out here, alone in the wilderness of the filthy terrestrial world, we are without defenses, or a home. The witch woman can prove helpful, very helpful indeed, and she might be even more willing to offer assistance if, as an example, she is led to believe that there is arcane knowledge to glean from her new demon friends.”
Again, he was right. I narrowed my eyes at him. “But we aren’t actually giving her anything in the end, are we?”
“Perish the thought. No. Never. Allow her to fill in the blanks and believe that she will be rewarded for her efforts. We make no promises and allow her to come to her own conclusions. Again, it is a simple, classic matter of seduction – something that you, as the heir of Lust, should know plenty about. But alas.”
The thought of Dantaleon seducing anyone – anything – made my stomach gurgle in the worst possible way. “Please, stop. I can feel the beans coming back up. Fine. We’ll play along. But maybe run things by me first next time you plan something like this.”
I could just feel him rolling his eyes at me. We turned back towards the abandoned building – what I would have to come to acknowledge as home, I suppose. The witch leaned against the doorframe with her arms folded. Pierce, on the other hand, was eating his way through a second can of beans. Wait.
“Are those my beans?”
He furrowed his eyebrows, giving me puppy dog eyes. “I’m so hungry,” he said. “And anyway, I’m bigger than you. I need the nutrients.”
I shook my head, sighing. The witch did the same.
“See, I told him he would crap his brains out, but he wouldn’t listen. And speaking of crap, your boy needs a bath. Now.”
“Who, me?” Pierce puffed his chest out and broadened his shoulders. “That’s just how a man smells. Get used to it, sister.”
She snapped her fingers, a flicker of purple flashing in her palm, where a bar of soap appeared. “River. Now.” She threw the soap at Pierce’s head. He yelped as he caught it, then stared at her aghast. “You don’t smell like a man, ‘bro.’ You smell like a dumpster.”
With some soap and half a can of beans in hand, Pierce headed to the river, muttering under his breath the whole while. Dantaleon and I waited at the threshold, the witch standing between us like the stone guardian of her own fortress. She nodded at Dantaleon, one eyebrow cocked.
“So, book guy. If you’re the prince’s servant, then these two must be your toadies.”
I began sputtering. Me, one of Dantaleon’s minions? The witch’s glance flitted between us, like she was searching for the truth. I bit my tongue. We needed to stick to the plan.
“Indeed,” Dantaleon said, adopting a dignified – well, in my opinion, even more pretentious tone. “Our prince has sent us out into the world to see the lay of the land, but we have encountered some complications with regards to our, ah, accommodations. She has plans, you see – ”
“She?” The witch’s eyes went wide with excitement. “A she-prince? Awesome.”
I could tell from her starry gaze that she was already running through infinite realities and possibilities in her head, including one where she, herself, ascended to the status of a prince of hell. Dantaleon had read her like an open book.
“Correct. She. Asmodeus’s powers and plans are more subtle and insidious than others, but she is not one to be trifled with. She is a harsh mistress, but she rewards her servants well, be they demon, or otherwise.”
The witch’s eyebrow was hitched so high up her forehead that I was worried her face would split at the seams. “Otherwise, you say?” She sucked on her teeth, looking around the field surrounding her home, then whistled. “I guess it couldn’t hurt to let you boys stay here a couple of nights.”
My right fist shook as I clenched it. Damn it, but I hated when Dantaleon was right.
We each found somewhere to turn down for the evening, in all not the worst way to spend my first night as an exile from Lust’s prime hell. Pierce picked the couch, after washing up in the river as commanded, of course. He could easily gut our witchy new friend in a matter of seconds, but the girl radiated authority, as well as an ever-present aura of intimidation.
She slept somewhere upstairs, presumably somewhere that resembled human bedchambers as much as the ground floor resembled a living room. I found a pile of blankets to settle into, thick enough to insulate me from both the cold and the hardness of the floor beneath. Mr. Wrinkles slept on my chest. Dantaleon picked the bookcase.
Come morning, I woke up grumpily to the tune of Pierce’s snoring. I found my body riddled with kinks and aches for the first time in a long time. I pulled myself up, sitting on the covers, scratching my stomach, staring off into nothing. One night away from home and already I was missing the comforts of my bedchambers and the massive four-poster bed that dwelled in it. But this was Mother’s punishment. She would see me crawling back to her on my hands and knees. I refused to give her the satisfaction.
The witch appeared on the ground floor not long after I awoke, no doubt summoned herself by the grating buzzsaw of Pierce sleeping with his mouth open and his hand
