day pushes its neck through

an opening in a metal garden gate

I identify with how it breaks apart

stands separate

As if refusing confines of a cell

I struggle to understand what this all means

Why I cling to flowers

When the newsfeed reports COVID-19 death after death

and fear

They say the pandemic most affects Black people migrant workers and poor Brown people globally, the aged and those with underlying conditions

And your friends are still dying from AIDS even when you thought hoped and prayed the worst was over

They say the next two weeks will be the pandemic’s greatest peak in America

People are yelling and fighting

in grocery stores

on the street

there is so much fear

And the life you knew good or bad may never return

But finally talking to my father today I

understood my connection to flowers more

Over the years, anticipating his demise he’s given me messages

Said, You’ve never given me any problems

You went off and did things on your own

You did everything all by yourself

You decided to go to New York and never looked back

You’ve made it on your own.

Today we are talking about the pandemic

I try to find masks and hand sanitizer to send to my family

Touched and impressed by my efforts, my father said

You still look out for us

You’re a beautiful girl

I’m glad you’re my daughter

I am here for you

And then I understand what it all means

If we can survive

have equipment means money

support conditions

There are also other possibilities

We can heal.

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