Instead of returning to the house, she lay on her back on the damp lawn and stared at the cloudless Southern California sky. So many fewer stars were visible here than in Wyoming. Were Dwayne and Amber looking at the stars tonight? She raised her hand in a silly, futile wave. Tears leaked from the corners of her eyes.
Get up, Marla.
She carried the shovel back to the garage, removed her muddy jeans and shoes, and dropped them on the floor in front of her car. After a long, hot shower, she pulled Dwayne’s shirt over her head and went to bed. The phone rang as she reached for the switch on her lamp.
“Hello, Char,” she answered.
“Hi, hon, how are you?”
She fell back against her pillow and sighed. “I’m all right. I was about to turn out the light. Please tell me Amber was unhurt.”
“Yes. Kids can be so resilient. She’s fine, but very sad that you weren’t here, and Skip was…”
“Killed. It’s okay to say it. Don’t worry about me. I know you and Donovan are scheduled to leave on your honeymoon in the morning. Go, have fun.”
“We want you to fly over there, sis. You can help me move in. I’ll have to buy tons of stuff for the house. We can have fun shopping in Honolulu and lounging on the beach.”
“That sounds wonderful, Char. Please give Amber a hug for me and thank Kathleen and Cookie and the rest of the ranch people for their hospitality.”
“I’ll see you when we get back to Spring Grove. We’ll be staying a couple of days at Mom and Dad’s before we fly to the islands. Good night, sis. I love you.”
“Love you too.” She turned the phone off and turned out the light. She dreamed she was in Dwayne’s strong arms, felt his hands and lips on her face and body, Skip snoring between them.
Chapter Thirty-Four
Dwayne called Marla several times during the last two weeks he and Amber remained at the ranch. She had to be screening his calls. He could never get past voicemail. He had no intention of leaving a long, incoherent apology on her phone. He needed to speak to her in person. When they returned to California, he’d find her and get down on his knees if he had to.
“She still not answering?” his mother asked.
“She doesn’t want to talk to me.”
“I don’t blame her, do you?”
“No. I’m the worst kind of jackass.” He raked a hand through his hair.
Kathleen stood behind his chair and put her arms around his neck. “Not quite, I was married to the worst kind of jackass—your father.”
“Yeah, guess who I got it from.” He leaned back against her and smiled, loving the soothing sensation of her hands on his cheeks. “Do you hate him?”
She chuckled and sat across the table. “Heavens, no, I wish I did. I’ll always have a soft spot for John Dempsey. He’s impossible to hate, but I was very angry at him for a long time.”
Dwayne leaned on his forearms and re-arranged the condiments on the table. “How come you never re-married, Mom?”
He thought of the look of longing in the sheriff’s eyes the night they arrested Francine and Luke. Kathleen was a good-looking woman, still barely into her mid-fifties.
“Oh…I’m not really sure. Living way out here, I got lost in the work of running the ranch, helping Daddy. Don’t forget, you came with me and lived here for almost five years, and your brothers stayed most summers.”
“Yeah, well, I was mad at Dad too.” He pushed himself to a standing position. His leg still tender, he winced.
“Is your leg still bothering you? Let me take a look at it.”
He shook his head and grinned. “Nah, Nurse Amber takes good care of me. It’s not red now.”
“Dwayne, your care is not Amber’s responsibility.” She raised a hand. “Don’t glare at me like that. I’m not telling you how to raise your own child. But it strikes me she’s a bit more sober than a six-year-old should be. You’re responsible for her, not the other way around.”
“I know, Mom, but it’s been just the two of us since the day she was born. It’s all she knows. She thinks of herself as the woman of the house.”
“Have you ever given any thought to how your tight, exclusive relationship with your daughter appears to others? Marla’s place in your hierarchy of values was quite obvious to her, and the rest of us, the day Amber went missing.”
“I’m still coming to grips with why I went off like that, behaved like such a jerk that day. I love her. Amber loves her. I want her to marry me.”
“You mean marry us. Amber will be smack in the middle of any relationship you have with any woman—regardless of how often she declares she wants Marla in your lives. Power struggles and vying for your affection and attention are inevitable.”
“I fully intended to avoid any thought of marriage or a serious relationship with a woman until after Amber went off to college.” He huffed and clawed at his hair again. “I wanted to sleep with Marla, not to fall in love with her.”
He paced the kitchen. Stopped and stared out the window. “I want her back, Mom. I can’t see living without her.” He raised his arms and gritted his teeth. “God! She’s so…I can’t explain…what…she means to me.”
Kathleen joined him in front of the window and put her arm around his waist. “There’s a phrase in the wedding vows about ‘forsaking all others.’ That means if you truly want to marry Marla, she must come first in your heart. I don’t think you’re ready for that reality. You certainly gave your true feelings away the day her dog got killed.”
He swallowed and took a deep breath. “I don’t know what to do. How can I choose between them?”
“That’s the thing, son. You don’t have to choose between them. You choose them. It’s
