Barzelhof culture also included – unofficially, of course – hazing, particularly for those boys who were seen as not fitting in. The faculty did not participate in this abuse, but they did not discourage it either. Many of them had taken part in such torments themselves when they had been in school, either at Barzelhof or at some other institution. They believed in it, thought it toughened the boys up, made men of them.
Eberhardt von Hohenstein and Erich Lobe were a year ahead of Willi. They liked Willi well enough and set about teaching him the Barzelhof ropes – which teachers let you get away with stuff and which didn’t, how to sneak out of the dormitory if you were given detention, that sort of thing. Eberhardt’s father was a diplomat stationed in the United States, and before that he had been stationed in Singapore and South Africa. Eberhardt could tell wonderful stories about places Willi could only dream of.
Willi was skinny and awkward, but he was a fast runner and an excellent soccer player, so Eberhardt and Erich asked him to join their soccer team. Willi was pleased and flattered. And he made a good addition to the team, passing the ball skillfully, dribbling downfield at full speed, and scoring against other teams with relative ease.
Andrea Welke was one of the boys who didn’t fit in. He was small and had a dark complexion, and because a serious case of rheumatic fever had left his heart weakened, he was excused from all physical activity, a fact that did not sit well with the rest of the boys or, for that matter, with some of the teachers. One of the teachers, a particularly bitter and unpleasant former cavalry officer, liked to pick on Welke, and some of the other boys followed suit. He would get jostled marching between classes, or someone would unscrew the salt shaker so Andrea would dump a shaker full of salt on his meal. Eberhardt and Erich decided to have a little fun with Welke and they invited Willi to join them.
‘Andrea,’ said Erich, ‘have you seen the comet?’
‘What comet?’ said Andrea.
‘Schiller’s comet. You can see it tonight. It’s amazing. Right, Eberhardt?’
‘Spectacular,’ said Eberhardt. ‘Really.’ He winked at Willi.
‘We’ll wait until lights out and then sneak out,’ said Erich.
‘I don’t know,’ said Andrea. He didn’t like the idea. They might get caught and then they’d be in trouble. At the same time, he didn’t want to miss out on the chance to be friends with Erich and Eberhardt whom everyone admired. He looked at Willi for reassurance.
‘It’ll be fun, Andrea,’ said Willi. ‘Come on.’
After lights out the four boys crept downstairs and out of the castle. It was a very dark night. They made their way single file through the woods.
After a short while, Andrea became fearful and said, ‘I want to go back.’
‘It’s just a little further,’ said Erich. ‘Just up there at the edge of the woods we’ll see the comet.’
‘No, I’m going back,’ said Andrea.
‘Why?’ said Eberhardt. ‘Are you scared?’
‘There’s no comet,’ said Andrea. ‘Is there?’
‘Yes, there is,’ said Erich.
‘I’m going back,’ said Andrea. He turned around.
‘No, you’re not,’ said Eberhardt. ‘Keep going.’ He pushed Andrea, who fell. ‘Get up,’ said Eberhardt. Andrea didn’t move. ‘Get up, you little cunt.’ He kicked Andrea.
Willi had known the comet was a ruse to get Andrea out of the building, but he hadn’t thought about what Eberhardt and Erich might want to do with him. ‘Come on, guys,’ said Willi. ‘Let’s go back.’
Eberhardt and Erich turned on Willi. ‘What, Geismeier, are you a cunt too?’
‘Get up, Welke,’ said Eberhardt. But Andrea stayed on the ground. He was breathing heavily and making odd moaning sounds.
Now Eberhardt and Erich started getting nervous. ‘What the hell’s wrong with you, Welke?’ said Eberhardt. ‘Get the hell up.’
‘He’s faking,’ said Erich.
‘No, he isn’t,’ said Willi.
‘Shut up, Geismeier.’
‘Leave him alone,’ said Willi.
‘Shut up, you goddamn weasel,’ said Erich. He put his fist in Willi’s face. The two boys stared at one another. Finally Erich realized Willi wasn’t going to back down. ‘Let’s go, Eberhardt,’ he said. ‘These two girls want to be alone.’
‘Yeah, right,’ said Eberhardt with a laugh. He spat in Willi’s direction as they left.
Willi helped Andrea stand and then supported him as they made their way back to the building. The duty officer was waiting for them inside the front door.
The next morning Willi was summoned to the commandant’s office. Erich and Eberhardt had reported seeing Geismeier and Welke sneak out of the building. They didn’t know where they had gone, but they were sure they were up to no good.
Willi stood at attention. The commandant was angry. ‘You’re in serious trouble, Geismeier. This is a serious infraction of the Barzelhof code of honor.’
Willi told about the Schiller comet and about luring Welke out to the woods. The commandant wanted to know whose idea it was. Willi said it had been the three of them: Erich, Eberhardt, and him.
‘I don’t believe you, Geismeier,’ said the commandant. ‘Von Hohenstein and Lobe both saw you go and they reported it. I want the truth, Geismeier, and I want it now.’
‘They were with us, sir.’
‘I said no lies, Geismeier.’
‘I’m not lying, sir,’ said Willi.
‘One more chance, Geismeier. Tell me what you and Welke were up to. We don’t tolerate lies at Barzelhof, Geismeier.’
‘I’m telling you the truth, sir.’
The commandant had faced situations like this before – boys experimenting with one another, their first tentative sexual explorations, and this had to be nipped in the bud. ‘There’s no room for deviancy at Barzelhof, Geismeier. We’re all men here, not fairies. We won’t stand for deviancy of any sort.’ The commandant had read a book about human psychology once, and deviancy was the one concept that had stayed with him. He had expanded the concept to mean any behavior he regarded as unmanly.
‘Do you know what deviancy is, Geismeier? I might have suspected Welke of deviant
