Meanwhile, an aware being is swimming through his existential mid-life crisis like a giant salamander, slowly, stumbling in the darkness of the abyss. But, he decides to keep going, not by necessity or for the love of life, but to challenge nature itself through his own existence, as previously, somehow, he did stumble on the truth that could make him kill himself. Still, he is hanging in there to prove that he will keep going against nature itself as it is the only way for him to truly exist as a pure consciousness, not as just a miserable being begging for life and reproduction. It is his only opportunity to challenge nature by creating an exception. And, in my opinion, only the exception can lead to true existence.
That giant salamander is a free-thinking organism that disengaged himself from the path of the slavery of the natural order, with all its superstition, cowardice, and all the expectations for his future. He did this to be truly a being present in the moment, happy to be, nothing more or less.
“I guess the Little Guy woke up, and he is throwing up on you his existential depression,” she said quietly.
“My giant salamander, walking slowly and blindly…” I replied.
“The Second Citizen is not aware of the source of the code, therefore there is only one person left – Wonfuse. Konu, we are stumbling in the dark just like your giant salamander. I’m not sure we can make it on time. It’s so well hidden, almost divine, I may say.”
“Nothing is divine except you, Oina. I wanted to tell you that whatever will happen at the meeting, I forgive you.”
“Konu, do me a favor... Stop your paranoiac thoughts, nothing will happen...”
We slept until the next morning. When I woke up, she was not there, of course. I fixed a small, cheap, black coffee from the coffee machine in the bedroom. I left the breakfast buffet served in the living room untouched, an old habit from my days in the Black Unit. There, I learned to avoid extravagant tastes that can mislead or soften my judgment in the battlefield. I went to the balcony to see how beautiful District 11 is, and it looks even better every time I visit. She is putting her heart and soul into it. Me dragging her into this crisis where she will lose everything, and I keep fooling myself that this will protect her. Deep inside me, I wish she will betray me, get me killed. That will resolve all my problems at once.
Yolp, the Second Citizen, just woke up. He called me in my room informing me that he had scheduled a breakfast with me.
“Are they treating you well here?” I asked him at the breakfast buffet in the private royal saloon, watching him drinking alcohol instead of coffee, stressed like he didn’t sleep last night.
“Konu, I hope I didn’t wake you up.” Then he added nervously and quietly, “I think someone is following me here. It was a bad idea. Why didn’t we bring some security, god damn it!”
I wasn’t in the best mood when I looked at him straight in the eyes and said, “Your paranoia will get us killed. Please sit and enjoy your meal. You are safe here.”
“Don’t talk to me like that. Who do you think you are?” I ignored him, but then he lost his temper and started lashing out at me, “Don’t ignore me! I’m talking to you! You know what, Konu? You are a nothing! We hired you into this position because we needed someone dumb and unknown so we could control the army. And let’s be clear, no one gives a damn about your AI score. Hundreds, if not thousands, of civilians out there could beat it.
“You are a nobody, just an old, grumpy, boring person. A total failure like you even couldn’t have a stupid family, living alone like a monster without a single friend. You think you are smart somehow by elaborating this plan? Well, guess what? They probably know everything about your naïve plan, trying to make them think that I am against the machine that I designed for years. They will be here for sure to do nothing but to laugh at you. What a joke! I have no idea how Wonfuse dragged me into this fiasco…”
I left in the middle of his madness…
At night, I started the decontamination just after a small talk with Yolp, asking me to forget what he said as he was a little bit drunk. I told him to not worry and to focus on the meeting as this is extremely important, and he agreed finally. A civilian car driven by an AI, autonomously took us to the Rocky Mountains, a two-hour drive that we did silently.
We only arrived at our destination after we had walked for another hour. A faint firelight came flickering out from a cave. Inside was Banume and Oris drinking hot tea from a teapot. They stood up, and it struck me how short they are, specifically Oris, as he looked like a skinny boy. Everyone waited for a moment, looked at each other with scrutiny, then Banume, with a small gesture, proposed us to sit, and we did.
Yolp, looking nervous, suddenly started his monologue. “Thank you for coming to this meeting in these dangerous times. As you probably already know, we are changing our mind and probably sides too. The machine… ” then Oris stopped him gently as Banume started to chuckle.
Oris spoke to Yolp in a completely broken accent, “Thank you for coming by yourself to us. What a brave person… You
