He got to his feet. “Mira, please, let me explain.”
“What is there to explain? How can you justify lying to me?” She pressed her lips together. “You told me you were a changed man. Changed men do not swap out their wife’s birth control pills, not when she asked you to allow some time to make this work. We haven’t been together long enough, and you go and do something like this.”
She took a step back.
“Mira, damn it, I love you. Okay, I wanted … I wanted to keep you with me. A baby means you’re mine. You will always be mine.”
“For goodness sake, Drake. This isn’t the dark ages. I can leave whenever the hell I want and nothing can stop me. Love me. Trust me. Allow me to see the real you. That’s how you keep me. Not this. I’m already bound to you because the thought of going anywhere else terrifies me. I want to be with you, Drake. As it is, I’m not leaving.” She put a hand on her stomach. “But I’ve moved into the spare bedroom, and I’m not going on the hunt for houses with you. I don’t even know if I want to stay married to you. You’ve hurt me, and I don’t know what to feel about that.”
She turned on her heel and walked to the spare bedroom, closing the door silently behind her before collapsing into a heap on the ground.
****
Drake had fucked up big. There was no doubt about it.
In trying to keep his woman, he’d successfully pushed her away, and now as he sat in his office, he hated himself. Hadn’t he always hated himself? The city looked so fucking happy with the sun shining. The people walking about, going about their lives. It all nauseated him. It had been a month since Mira discovered the pills. A month of him sinking lower and lower into a pit of depression.
Gripping the back of his head, he pressed his forehead to the glass. The irony of his situation was he’d planned to tell Mira that night what he’d done. The guilt had been eating up at him, tearing him apart. She had so many worries when it came to motherhood and her insecurities ate away at him. He’d caused this.
His selfish desires and old insecurities drew him to do this, and now, where was he, sleeping alone.
Mira wouldn’t even eat with him. His food was always prepared, and it was so delicious. He never saw her, though. To see his wife, he had to wait until late at night to sneak into her bedroom to watch her sleep.
Every single night, he was tempted to slip behind her, hold her close, and pretend nothing was going wrong.
Everything was going wrong. Nothing had gone right.
They’d gone to the doctor’s and he had plunged the knife in confirming the pills she’d picked up were not working from the very first day. He’d knocked her up that first night they had sex after their pause to make sure they took effect.
All it had done was deepen the pain.
He missed her so much. He loved his wife and no amount of flowers, chocolate, or jewelry was going to make this right.
Time. He wasn’t a patient man.
His work was affected by the constant distance between them. If his enemies ever found out, they would be laughing at him now. A woman making him fall.
The moment five came, he closed down his computer, turned his light off, and left his office. Even though he spent his time at home alone, he was determined to never be late for dinner. He arrived home at five thirty. His food was on the table. No sign of Mira. If he was quiet enough, he heard her, though. Sometimes her bedroom door was left open.
He put his briefcase down and went to the lonely table.
A pasta dish waited for him and a single envelope.
Normally, just the food waited for him, but fear tightened in the back of his throat as he picked up the envelope, not knowing what she could have left for him.
He turned it over, dreading what he might find.
Inside was a picture.
Drake turned it over and saw it was from the ultrasound. At the time, there had been a technical fault, but the doctor had promised an image would be provided of their child. His baby didn’t want to show them if it was a boy or girl.
“It came today,” Mira said. She stood in a jacket as he got to his feet.
“Where are you going?” he asked.
“I need to head to the pharmacy. It’s not a big deal. I talked to the doctor about the sickness. I’m losing a little too much weight because of the morning sickness. He gave me the details of something to take that will help. I’m just going to go and get it.”
“Let me come with you.”
She held her hand up. “No. It’s fine. Eat your dinner while it’s warm. I cooked it. I hope you like it.”
“Mira, I love everything you do. You know this. I love you.”
Tears filled her eyes. “I know, which is why this is so hard, Drake. I … I’ve got to go and get some air and then I think we need to talk about … the future.”
“I’m not letting you go.”
“Let me go and get this. I really need the air. We’ll talk when I get back.”
“I love you, Mira. Please, I love you.”
“I’ll be back in ten minutes. We’ll talk. Please.”
He wanted to argue with her. To demand he go with her, but instead, he nodded. “Our baby looks beautiful.”
She nodded and
