“They love me,” he said, offering it up as proof of his worthiness.
“It’s the one thing that makes me question their judgment,” she teased, stepping at last into his arms and resting her head against his chest. “I’m sorry for lapsing into impossible Moira mode.”
He gave a startled gasp that had her chuckling. “You didn’t think you were the first to call me that, did you? Mum dubbed me with the name before I was ten, along with a few other disparaging phrases. I’ve done my best to live up to all of them.”
“It’s been a while since I’ve seen that side of you,” he said.
“It comes out mostly when I’m scared and unsure of myself,” she admitted.
“Are you feeling that way right now?” he asked.
She shook her head. “No, I’m suddenly feeling safe.”
Luke held her close, feeling her slowly relax, feeling the steadiness of her heart as it beat next to his. She was a complicated woman, more than likely destined to drive him a little crazy, but he wouldn’t have wanted it any other way. That was both the challenge and the joy of her.
“Mind telling me why we were arguing over the dishes back there?” he asked when he thought it was safe to bring up the topic.
She glanced up at him. “Do you honestly think I have an answer for that, at least one that makes sense?”
“I was hoping,” he admitted. “If I’m not to stir up your ire over such things again, it would be best if I understand. Was it over walking out on the cleanup?”
“No.”
“Was it over my presumption that you’d want to leave with me?”
He could feel her smile against his chest.
“That was annoying, but no,” she said.
“Then I’m at a loss.”
She sighed. “So am I, to be perfectly honest. I think I’ve been juggling a lot of emotions since I got here. This afternoon, being in your bed, made me start to want things that aren’t necessarily in the cards. I had a perfectly lovely conversation with your grandmother when I got back here and thought I’d figured things out, but tonight the panic crept over me again. I can’t seem to stop it from coming on when I least expect it. I should be over the moon every minute to be here with you, for however long it is. I should be living entirely in the moment, but there’s this tiny part of me that keeps looking ahead to what might happen once I’m home. I hadn’t expected that. I’m not sure I’m happy about it.”
He held her away from him so he could look into her eyes. “Are you worrying again about a future for us, Moira? Who says it’s not in the cards?”
“You’re just launching something new and exciting here. I have an opportunity to accomplish something back in Ireland. How is that going to work?”
“I have no idea,” Luke admitted candidly. “But it will if we want it to. We just have to be honest with each other and try out all the alternatives until one fits our circumstances.”
She looked surprised by his assessment. “Then you subscribe to the theory of compromise that your grandmother believes in?”
“I do. I’ve seen the disastrous results that can happen when it isn’t tried and how well things can work out when it is.”
“Tell me,” she urged.
He settled into one of the chairs with her on his lap. “You know that my uncle Mick and Megan were divorced for many years. I was only a baby when they split up, but I’ve gathered it was because he was always gone for work and she felt as if she’d been left alone to raise five children. His priorities were all out of whack, but for some reason she hesitated to make that plain to him. Instead, she kept silent, hoping he’d figure things out on his own, until finally she lost patience.”
“Jess mentioned something along those lines to me,” Moira confessed.
“Well, before they reconciled a little over a year ago, they finally figured out how to get what they each wanted,” Luke continued. “He cut back on his schedule. She learned to speak up about the things that she needed from him. That’s just one example.”
“Tell me another,” she urged, clearly anxious for reassurance that there was hope.
“Trace and Abby. She was terrified that he’d be like her first husband and insist that she quit work if they had a baby.”
“Don’t they have twins already?” Moira asked.
“They’re Abby’s from her first marriage. She divorced her husband because he wanted her to give up her Wall Street career to care for the girls. She was afraid that Trace would insist on the same thing.” He smiled. “Now she’s pregnant with a baby due any second, because she finally had faith that Trace meant what he said about wanting her to have a career and a home, too. He works at home and picks up all the slack with raising the kids. It works for them.”
“But she’s no longer on Wall Street,” Moira said.
“No, she’s with the same firm, running the Baltimore brokerage office. That’s her side of the compromise.”
Moira nodded, as if finally seeing it. “And Bree’s content with her theater here, because Jake’s here. She has her dream, just not in New York or Chicago.”
“Exactly. I don’t know what’s in store for us, Moira. I only know I want the time to find out. And if we decide we want to be together forever, we’ll figure out a way to make it
