She frowned at that. “So, what are you suggesting? Should I spend years with a shrink trying to get to the bottom of it? Spill my guts to every person I meet until it no longer has the power to hurt me?”
“I don’t know the answer to that,” he said candidly. “I just know that keeping it bottled up doesn’t really seem to be working all that well for you, not if it’s cutting you off from having the full life you deserve.”
“Meaning a relationship with you?” she said, an edge back in her voice.
“Meaning a relationship with anyone. How can you honestly have a real friendship with someone, much less anything deeper, if you’re holding some huge part of yourself back?”
Even as he said the words, he realized they applied to him, as well. Shaken, he stepped out from behind the counter.
“I’m glad you’re feeling better now,” he told her. “There were a few sales earlier, but it’s been pretty quiet. If you have any questions, you know how to find me.”
She gave him a puzzled look as he headed for the door. “Aidan, are we okay?”
He turned back. “You mean do we understand each other?”
She nodded.
“Probably even more than you realize,” he said quietly. “Take care, Liz.”
This time he was the one who walked away with a whole slew of conflicting emotions plaguing him, leaving Liz to stare after him with confusion written all over her face.
12
Aidan had very mixed feelings about the end of school. Even though he’d scheduled a few team meetings over the summer and arranged for the players to follow training and nutrition guidelines, he couldn’t help feeling as if way too much was being left until summer’s end. He suspected every high school coach, faced with the challenge of getting his kids ready for the new season, felt the same way.
It helped a little that Porter Hobbs was finally on board with the change Aidan had recommended for Taylor. He’d stood on the sidelines at three straight practices and seen the way his son and Hector connected to make the kind of plays that could win a regional championship if the rest of the team played at their level. Of course, at this point that was a very big if.
On the last day of practice, Hobbs had actually congratulated Aidan for spotting Taylor’s potential. Aidan knew it helped that Taylor was genuinely excited about the change and had become friends with both Hector and Henry. Aidan wasn’t sure how Hobbs felt about the friendship, but the trio were proving to be real team leaders.
Aidan was in his office on Tuesday afternoon making his final notes for the year when the door opened and the three boys stuck their heads in.
“Coach, do you have a minute?” Taylor asked.
“Of course,” he said, leaning back and noting that they seemed to be surprisingly hesitant. “What’s on your mind?”
“The team’s been talking,” Henry said, glancing at the others for affirmation. Hector and Taylor nodded.
“We’d like to keep practicing this summer,” Henry continued. “I know it’s your vacation, but we know we have a lot of work to do. Team meetings won’t be nearly enough. Would you mind setting up a real training schedule and working with us?”
“Just a couple of days a week,” Taylor suggested, then grinned. “It is summer vacation, after all, and we want to do fun stuff, too.”
Hector followed up, his expression worried. “Only if it’s no trouble,” he added.
Prepared for some sort of bad news, Aidan was stunned by the request and the initiative they’d shown. He regarded the three of them with astonishment. “Whose idea was this?”
“Mine,” Taylor said, looking embarrassed. “I should have thought of it last year.”
“You’d just made the varsity team,” Aidan reminded him. “You’d probably barely found your way to the locker room.”
Taylor laughed. “Are you kidding me? My dad’s been taking me through the locker room and the stadium since it was built. I think it was a hint.”
“More than likely,” Aidan agreed, imagining all the ways Hobbs had gone about putting added pressure on his son. “Is the entire team on board with this?”
Henry nodded, his whole demeanor suggesting their eagerness for him to agree. “We want to win next season and we’re starting to believe we can.”
“Good,” Aidan told him. “Because I believe it. Let me speak to Rob about the policy. I don’t know if official team practices are allowed or any of the other implications about holding a school activity during summer break. I’ll do my best to figure out something that won’t break any rules.”
The boys immediately exchanged excited high fives.
“No matter what I find out,” he told them, “I’m very impressed by your enthusiasm. That’s the kind of commitment it takes to be winners. I want you to tell your teammates that. I’ll be in touch in a day or two, as soon as I see what can be worked out.”
“Thanks, Coach,” Taylor said, leading the others from Aidan’s office.
He leaned back in his chair, a smile spreading across his face. If enthusiasm and commitment were the only keys, this team was going places. Best of all, he’d seen glimpses of the raw talent it would take to get them there.
* * *
Liz thought a lot about what Aidan had said about the inability to truly move forward if the past maintained a stranglehold on her emotions. She found herself wanting to talk to him more about that, and about why he seemed to know so much about it. Was it because of whatever she’d sensed he was holding back about some prior relationship with the O’Briens? He claimed not to have one, but more than once his body language and odd reticence when the name was mentioned suggested otherwise. Still, it was hard for her to imagine bad blood that no one on the O’Brien side seemed aware of.
On Wednesday morning, Archie was freshly bathed, his toys assembled in a big basket.
