“Except for a demanding career, I’ve heard.”
“It took a lot of time, that’s for sure.”
“And now? How will you manage that and a baby?” Louise asked.
Gabi didn’t want to discuss the adoption possibility or her job status with a woman she barely knew, so she merely shrugged. “I guess I’ll figure it out,” she said.
“Want the single piece of advice someone once gave me that keeps me sane?” Louise asked.
“Sure.”
“Don’t expect perfection. It’s unlikely anyone will die if you don’t get to the dusting one week. While a balanced, healthy meal is certainly desirable, if you have pizza one night, enjoy it. If your kid skins a knee while you’re not around, don’t blame yourself. It could just as easily have happened while you were standing right beside him. And if they leave the house wearing mismatched, inside-out clothes they chose themselves, just close your eyes and be glad they remembered to put on shoes.”
Gabi smiled. “That sounds incredibly sensible. How long did it take you to buy into it? You must have been pretty driven to get through law school.”
Louise chuckled. “You have no idea. I believe the message finally took root after Peter came along. He was my second. With Bryce, I kept thinking I should be able to manage it all. With Peter, I took a deep breath and started to accept that I couldn’t. I still have my freak-out moments when I think I’m messing everything up. Ask Wade. But I’m getting better.”
Gabi hesitated, considering if Louise might be the perfect person, after all, to answer the question she hadn’t been able to shake. “Do you think it would be insane for me to try to have this baby on my own? Look at all the backup you have, and you still freak out.”
Louise looked startled by the question. “But you are having it on your own, or am I wrong about that? Is the dad in the picture?”
“No, he’s not.” She drew in a deep breath, then revealed, “But I’ve been thinking the best thing for the baby might be adoption.”
Louise’s eyes widened. “Oh, wow! I had no idea.” A frown settled on her face. “Does Wade know about that?”
For a minute, Gabi was thrown by the concern she saw in Louise’s eyes. “He knows.”
“What does he think?”
“It’s not something we really talked about. It’s pretty much my decision to make.”
“Gabi, I may be the wrong person to be asking about this,” Louise said candidly. “I have absolutely nothing against adoption. I think it’s a wonderful choice under many circumstances. I don’t know enough about yours to know if that’s the case.”
There was something left unspoken. Gabi could sense it. She could feel it in a sudden coolness in Louise’s attitude, but she didn’t understand it.
And unfortunately, as the afternoon went on, nothing happened to change the chill in the atmosphere. As soon as she could politely do so, Gabi suggested to Wade that they should leave. She noticed that there was no argument from Louise.
Gabi sighed as she slid into Wade’s car, leaned her head back and closed her eyes.
Wade slipped into the driver’s seat, but rather than starting the car, he turned to her. “Mind telling me what happened between you and my sister? It was painfully obvious that something did. What on earth did she say to you? If she offended you, I’m sorry. She tends to get pretty protective where I’m concerned.”
Gabi didn’t try to pretend that she hadn’t been aware of the tension. “It wasn’t anything she said. It was me. I said something about adoption and it kind of freaked her out.”
Wade heaved a sigh. “I can imagine,” he said. “I’m sorry.”
“What did I miss? Why would she react that way? And she asked if you knew I was thinking about it.”
“Lou’s very protective of me, especially since I lost Kayla and the baby. She’s obviously aware that I have feelings for you.” He met her gaze. “Can you see where this is going?”
It suddenly dawned on Gabi what he was saying. “She sees me giving up this baby as you potentially losing another child.”
“Something like that.”
“But, Wade, we’re not involved,” she protested.
“That doesn’t seem to stop me from having feelings for you,” he said ruefully. “She can see that. All her sisterly, protective instincts kicked in.”
“I told you this was too complicated,” Gabi said, feeling awful. “I’m so sorry. The adoption thing is on the table. I feel as if I have to consider it. Not to think about it would be irresponsible under my circumstances.”
“Circumstances change,” he said, his gaze direct. “I’m not saying yours have. It’s way too soon to say that, but they do change, Gabi. Keep an open mind.”
She shook her head. “Wade, you’re great. I don’t want to be careless with you.”
“Hey, I’m a grown man. I can handle a few complications.”
“But maybe—”
“No maybes,” he said adamantly. “We’re friends. I’m not walking away from that.”
Gabi couldn’t help wondering, though, if she ought to do what he so obviously couldn’t or wouldn’t do and walk away herself, especially if a decision she was likely to make about her child was destined to hurt him.
* * *
Wade thought the dinner at his sister’s had gone well enough, at least until the adoption issue had come up. Despite that, Gabi had been great with the kids and had entertained them all with stories of spending her summers here working for Cora Jane. On the way home he’d suggested they stop for a cup of decaf at a small coffee shop, but she’d pleaded exhaustion. There’d been unmistakable relief in her eyes when he hadn’t argued.
Back at her grandmother’s he’d debated a kiss goodbye, one a bit steamier than those he’d bestowed up to now, but even though he’d longed to kiss the perpetual frown off her beautiful face, he’d figured she wasn’t even close to ready for that. And it would definitely muddy those waters she was already fretting
