‘Thank you, Mr Slater. But I am a wedding planner, not a private eye. Feel free to do whatever snooping you fancy. I have a big wedding on Raven Island next weekend and a dozen other events in various stages of preparedness. I am much too busy to be poking my nose in anywhere else. I expect the police will figure this out for themselves and prove my innocence soon enough without me having to lift a finger.’
‘Final word?’ He offered me a chance to change my mind.
I pointed to my front door again. ‘Please leave, Mr Slater.’
He smiled and nodded. ‘No problem, Felicity. Whatever you say. I’m going to call this mission accomplished anyway.’
Confused, I asked, ‘Mission what? What are you saying now?’
He was backing away from me, heading for the door, and spread his arms as a show of innocence. ‘Well, the chaps offered me a little wager and I can honestly claim to have won.’ He waited for my confusion to deepen. ‘I bet them I would get to see you naked and have breakfast at your house.’
The coffee mug smashed into the door half a second after his big, stupid grin vanished behind it.
Bribing the Cat
I allowed myself a second to fume, glaring at the door and half hoping Vince would open it again for one final parting comment because I already had another missile ready in my right hand.
When I heard his car start and the crunch of gravel as he pulled away, I placed the apple I held ready back in my fruit bowl and crossed the kitchen to the coffee machine. I was operating on far less sleep than was usual and felt the caffeine was not only justified but necessary.
I made toast, deciding against the bacon largely because Vince had touched it.
Buster followed me. ‘Do you not want the bacon? Because if you are not planning to eat it … actually, even if you are planning to eat it, I think I would benefit enormously from the extra calories and protein.’
I shot him a look. ‘Have you been watching the fitness channel again?’
Amber stopped licking her paw for a moment to say, ‘He caught a special on muscle building and now thinks he can turn himself into a rottweiler if he eats the right food.’
‘I didn’t say rottweiler,’ snapped Buster. ‘But, yes, essentially it is time to up my game. If I want to be a superhero night stalker dog, I need to put on muscle.’
I looked down at the floor from where Buster looked back up. There were two lines of drool hanging from either side of his mouth. One almost reached to the floor. He gave me a hopeful expression and an idea popped into my head.
I blinked a couple of times and let it go around inside my skull, but it was an idea with merit.
‘Amber,’ I started, swivelling to face her. She didn’t bother to look my way; I was nowhere near as interesting as her paw. ‘Would you be willing to do something for me if there was a piece of fresh fish in it for you?’
I was quite willing to admit that as a wedding planner, I had no business attempting to investigate the death of John Ramsey and whatever other crimes were associated with it. Poking my nose where it wasn’t wanted hadn’t done me much good so far. However, Buster and Amber, and in particular my unique relationship with them, might give me an advantage no one else would have.
Could I solve the crime with the help of my pets? It would put the chief inspector’s nose truly out of joint and maybe even wipe that shark-infested grin from Vince’s face.
I would be lying if I said the concept wasn’t tempting. It was tempting enough that I was already thinking about how I could employ my cat and dog.
When I looked back to see if Amber had even heard me, I found she was staring at me. Giving me her attention was a rarity unless she wanted something and that didn’t happen very often.
‘Don’t tease me, woman,’ she meowled in warning. ‘It’s not beyond me to seek revenge if promised gifts do not materialise.’
She’d never spoken like this before. More usually, it was all I could do to get here to even pay me attention. Had I just discovered the secret trick that would make her do as I ask?
‘What sort of fish would you like it to be?’ I asked.
The paw she’d been licking still hovered in the air an inch from her face. She placed it back on the counter, fixing me with a serious expression. ‘Mackerel. Lightly poached in milk with a bay leaf, the stock or liquor reserved for drinking separately.’
Oh, yeah, I had her attention now.
‘What if I promised to give you the mackerel exactly as you have just described it. Would you be willing to do something for me?’
Amber narrowed her eyes. ‘I’m a cat. I already do plenty for you.’
Scratching his left ear with a back foot, Buster laughed. ‘Oh, yeah? Like what?’
‘I enrich your life just by being here. Unlike the dog, I instil calm and a sense of wellbeing. I brighten any room I choose to enter … must I go on? Does your ignorance not embarrass you?’
Amber was just being a cat, but she was going to have to dance to my tune if she wanted the poached fish.
‘Let me put it another way. What would you do, beyond that which you already do, for the offer of a piece of poached mackerel?’
‘Poached in milk,’ Amber reminded me.
Buster said, ‘I’ll do anything you ask. I’ll do it right now, I’ll do it twice, and you only have to give me a
