So I had to make the best out of a bad situation. I had to learn to give more and take less. It was time for me to sacrifice something for those two. They spoiled me too much, anyway. I had to learn to grow up now. A tear rolled down my cheek. Old insecurities sprang up from never having had a family of my own. Giving up something that belonged only to me was hard for me. It had always been my weakest point.
I thought about the way Skye had cried in my arms because she felt so bad about her conflicting emotions and the whole time my eyes had stayed on Jasper who looked as though he wanted to snatch her from me and protect her from her own pain but for my sake, he stayed his arms.
Fuck.
I had never felt this kind of raw emotion in my life like I felt for the two of them.
"Damn it, Cole, I can't see you like this," Jasper's gruff voice intruded upon my thoughts. "I'm so fucking sorry about Skye. I didn't even realise when I started to-"
"Been there. Done that," I told him carelessly. "Welcome to my world, baby."
He exhaled roughly and moved to sit beside me on the bed, burying his face in his hands.
I glanced over at him. So close. So tortured. My love.
My hand crept out to caress his broad back. "Tell me it gets better. That you get used to seeing the person you love be with somebody else," I begged him softly because I did not trust myself to be able to do this without losing my shit. Was I even strong enough? Selfless enough?
Jasper let out another breath and straightened. "It only got better for me when I started to care for her too. The day before I left for London. I didn't resent her anymore or feel angry when I saw you with her. In fact, I started to want that," he finished in a whisper.
I sighed. "Okay. That helps. But I swear to God, Jasper, if you scare her away-"
"Why do you keep saying that?" he erupted suddenly.
"Because she isn't very experienced and she's...Jasper she's just so fucking honest and emotional, I don't know if she can handle your brand of sex."
He choked upon hearing my words and got to his feet. "You coddle her too much," he snapped at me. "She's not fragile, Cole. And it's not like I'm some kind of savage. You're just being a jealous prick. And there's no need to be because you're just as important to me."
I fell quiet after that, pondering upon his words. I did feel jealous. And kind of sick. Shit, is this what I caused Jasper to go through when I told him about Skye? It felt like hell.
"I need an asprin," I moaned and turned to bury my face into the pillow.
Jasper huffed. "Drama queen," he muttered but I heard him go into the bathroom to look for some anyway.
~~~
Skye
The last thing I felt like doing that night was going out to a local restaurant for dinner with the entire gang but Olivia insisted and she was being so generous, I did not want to seem like a bad friend. But God, it was the toughest thing to have to pretend to be having fun when my mind was consumed with thoughts of two men and the pressure to make a decision looming over me.
All day, I had been holed up in my room, only emerging in the afternoon to eat something when my stomach could no longer bear the emptiness. Cole and Jasper were nowhere to be seen and when I met my friend downstairs, she told me Richard had taken them out to watch a local soccer game and then they would go on his yacht later.
I was relieved. We were currently practising the no-contact method. They left me alone to think things through and I wished to avoid them because all that testosterone was not helping with my emotional overload.
I did not even want to think about the sexual overload.
Olivia tried to grill me about them both as she sipped on her tea but I hedged a lot and she sensed that I did not want to talk about it. Then she suggested we go hang out in her private spa room and for a couple of hours, everything felt so blissful. I felt carefree and girlie.
If I didn't love them so much, I would tell them both to leave me the fuck alone so I could live in peace. But there could be no peace without the men I had given my heart and soul to. And Jasper...he actually loved me. I never imagined he would fall for me. It was more than a little overwhelming.
I had a sudden vivid image of both of them naked in bed, with me in the middle and they started taking turns with me like a couple of animals in heat.
It should turn me on, right? Well, it did but it also terrified me. What if I felt like it was too much? Maybe I enjoyed being vanilla and all. And what if they decided to double team me? Holy hell. I would die.
I started to grow anxious and my heart pounded in my chest as I sat staring at my drink at the club we went to later that night. Olivia, Richard, Cole and Jasper were dancing and enjoying themselves whereas I was a nervous wreck. How did I get myself into this mess? My fingers shook as I picked up my drink and gulped it down without even bothering to taste the sweet cocktail.
I just wanted to leave. And sleep alone. Now I knew how Cole must have felt last night being caught in the
