"I'm sorry," I choked out and wiped at my cheeks, no doubt smearing more paint.
"Oh my God," he dragged out in a lazy, long-suffering manner when he realised I was crying again.
I decided to cut him some slack because my insensitive comment probably deserved that kind of response and slowly got to my feet. "I need to go take a shower," I muttered and blindly searched for my towel. "Sorry."
I tried to rush past him but felt his fingers grip my wrist and halt me. A strong, firm grip that made me blink back the tears and look at his face searchingly.
"Come here," he growled, tugging on my hand.
I swallowed at his determined tone and hesitated for a few seconds.
"Skye. Come here," he ordered again, locking his gaze with mine. Then a hint of a smile ghosted around his mouth. "Come sit on Daddy's lap."
I sucked in a shocked breath and shook my head at him. "Stop it, Wells."
His smile started to grow as my breathing quickened. "Come on, little girl. I'm sorry I upset you. Let me give you some cuddles and make it all better," he pressed softly.
Despite my emotional state, I found my core tightening at his words, the hot look in his eyes and his persistence. Jasper. Fuck, Jasper. I missed you.
He tugged on my hand again and as though in a trance, I drifted to him and found myself sitting sideways on his lap. He smiled at me fully this time, clearly very pleased at my submission and brushed my hair out of my face with gentle fingers.
"Tell me where it hurts, baby," he continued to croon but in my ear this time. I shivered. "Let Daddy take care of it."
I surprised myself by giggling and punched him lightly on the arm. "Shut up. You sound creepy."
His response was to start placing feathery kisses along the exposed skin of my neck, his breath hot and arms tight around me.
Moaning, I squirmed in his lap urging him to react, to want me, feel something, rip me apart. "Jasper, please," I gasped, turning to straddle him.
He stopped me by drawing back and shaking his head, a pained look on his face.
"I can't," he explained. "I don't know why. The therapy isn't helping with it."
I regarded him in frustration and helplessness. "Cole said you don't even try. Just let us take care of it. We can be inventive. We can-"
His expression shuttered again. "So now the two of you are discussing my erectile dysfunction behind my back."
"It's not like that-"
"Do you laugh about it too?" he demanded, his fingers digging into my flesh. "About how a sexed-up stud like me can no longer perform in the bedroom. How I can't fucking please him anymore. No wonder he spends all his nights with you, Skye. Pretty soon he's going to come to his senses and realise I'm not worth all the effort," he finished bitterly.
I scrambled off his lap and felt burning anger coursing through me. Yes. I was aware stroke victims suffered from mood swings. I understood that. But for him to constantly doubt Cole's love for him...I couldn't bear it any longer.
"He hasn't fucked me, okay," I sobbed. "You keep thinking the worst of him, Jasper. You're such an idiot sometimes. He can't bring himself to have sex with me and get that satisfaction while you're lying there in bed unable to feel that sort of pleasure at all. He denies himself, denies me because he has hope. So much hope for you that one day, everything will go back to the way it was."
Sobs wrecked through my body as I relayed Cole's pain while Jasper appeared shocked at the revelation.
"The reason he sleeps with me is because he is heartbroken that you don't even let him try and help you with your dick issues. Forget that, you barely even allow him to hold you while sleeping. You brush him off every time and it hurts him so much. I'm the only one who is able to make him snap out of his misery! You know what Cole is like. He needs affection. You've been with him longer. I shouldn't be the one explaining this to you."
Picking up my towel, I stalked out of the room before I said anything else in anger and ended up regretting it.
~~~
Chapter 38
Cole
Kryptonite by 3 Doors Down invaded my eardrums when I got home from work that afternoon. I paused in the act of shedding my coat. Music. That choice of music. Jasper loved that song.
I followed the sound coming from the open doorway of the office and halted when I spotted my boyfriend seated at the desk clicking away on his laptop with an absorbed expression on his face.
As the music surrounded me, I stood there for a moment and simply looked at him, not wanting to interrupt whatever he was doing even though I was curious as hell. He only used his laptop when he worked and I didn't believe for a moment things had taken such a fortunate turn when just this morning, he had barely made the effort to grunt a goodbye when I kissed him before leaving.
His gaze flicked up after what seemed like a long time and he finally noticed my presence. I smiled at him in greeting and lifted my hand in a slight wave because talking would be impossible over the volume of the music. Jasper gave me a look which I would have called almost predatory if I did not know better and lifted his own hand in a mock salute. That made me grin outright at him. After all this time, he still made me feel like I was in love for the first time.
