His eyebrows came together in a frown. "It's been two months, Skye," he said quietly. "I haven't brought up the subject because I didn't want to push you but...are you really never going to forgive Jasper?"
Putting the magazine away, I shifted and gave my husband a tender look. "I forgave Jasper the same night you found out the truth about Jacob," I told him gently. "Whatever he did, I don't blame him for it anymore. He was at a weak point in his life and sometimes, even the strongest of men lose their way. Jasper and I are okay."
There was a puzzled expression in my husband's eyes. "But-"
"Listen to me," I interrupted softly, rubbing his thighs reassuringly. "I know you love us both so much and wish we could all just be together like before." I gave him a rueful smile. "But you have to try and see things from my point of view. For whatever reasons he did it, the fact is that Jasper betrayed me. He broke my trust, Cole and for me, knowing how vulnerable I am, I don't believe I can ever trust him again not to hurt me."
Cole sucked on his bottom lip, watching me gravely.
"Besides, it's not like we don't love each other. I mean, we're a family. I know he cares about me but let's face it, the guy loves you way more than he could ever love me." I pursed my lips. "I really don't think he can share himself equally with me like you are able to because of all the things that went wrong between us. Me leaving and destroying him in the process, his cheating, me lying about Jacob."
I looked away and let out a breath. "It weakened more of that bond that was already too weak to begin with. Which had formed only because of the novelty of our relationship and then later, my pregnancy."
"I'm so sorry, Skye," Cole said in a low voice.
I shrugged. "Don't be. It's for the best. I don't want to force a relationship with a guy I can never trust or who will always resent me a little for denying him his parental rights." Taking my husband's hands, I smiled at him with all my heart. "Your love for me is enough, Cole. It's what makes me happy. I know that I can always count on you. Because you gave up Jasper out of respect for my feelings. You stood by me because he was wrong no matter how much it hurt you. That is the kind of man I can trust my heart with."
Cole finally started to relax, the tension in his features fading a little. "As long as you're happy, honey. If I'm ever failing you in any way, you let me know okay. But I'm going to give it my best shot. Always."
My heart just melted at those words and the sincerity of his tone. My husband. My sweet baby. Finding a man like him was a miracle these days. There was so much love in that pure heart of his.
I cleared my throat because I was getting too emotional and shooed him away. He grinned, kissed my lips softly and then returned to his task. I couldn't tell him about what really happened the night Jasper found out that he was Jacob's father. That was between me and Jasper.
At the end of that night, I had had a revelation. That I should've confronted Jasper Wells the same day he had returned from London over two years ago instead of being too weak to face him. As a result, I had dragged that pain, anger and resentment with me the whole time he had been gone.
I hadn't allowed myself that closure and so his memories had haunted me, the shadow of it affecting my marriage with Cole along with my secret which I had also been wrong to drag out. I'd only ended up hurting myself and my husband.
The night at the gallery, after Jasper and I had hashed everything out and hurled all the rage and accusations brewing in our hearts at each other for the final time, I had realised that I actually wasn't in love with him. And maybe he had realised it too because even after the sex, there was nothing between us that felt even remotely close to what we had shared when we had first fallen in love.
It was all over. It had been over for so long and just because we had never had a chance to break up properly, we'd simply believed that we couldn't move on.
I laid my chin on my forearms where they rested on the counter, watching Cole as he went about his cooking. Two years wasted holding on to all that angst. Just because letting go of a relationship I had had so much faith in once hadn't been that easy.
****
Chapter Thirty-Seven
Jasper
I came back after a week to find my son playing out in the tiny front yard with one of my cameras. He was trying to take pictures even though the damned thing wasn't even working. My chest swelled with pride as I watched him, aching to crush him to myself but I held back just a tiny fraction of a moment longer to gaze at him without him becoming aware of my presence.
When he finally noticed me standing there, he grinned in that pure, delighted manner that kids do and sprinted over to me.
"Jasper," he said happily as I scooped him up in my arms and gave him a hug.
"Hey, buddy. How've you been?" I asked gruffly, feeling a little emotional because it was the first time since moving in with them that I had been away from him this long.
"I want candy," he told me in a serious
