“No.”
“Well, scrap. The truth is, I’m nervous about this mission. I don’t like going into a situation with so many unknowns.”
“It’s not my favorite either.” She leaned against the wall. “But we work with what we’ve got. This is our best shot.”
“I know. But I haven’t seen as much of this kind of op as the rest of you. Until recently, I’d spent the last decade teaching teenagers at the academy. It’s not exactly high-stakes stuff.”
She glanced at Raptor, but he didn’t seem concerned. Ross was simply having some nerves, then. Fortunately, he’d gone to the right person to talk him through it. That let Fallon off the hook, though as the team leader she still had an obligation to be sure that they could count on Ross.
“You’ll be staying on board the Nefarious, anyway. Someone needs to, and you’re the next-best pilot. If we’re lucky, you’ll only be minding the store while we’re gone.” And if they weren’t, he might have to engage in some tricky maneuvers to keep the ship safe. But she didn’t think saying so would do much to calm his nerves.
“It’s too bad we couldn’t bring that engineer friend of yours. The one you want to recruit. Would have been comforting to know that if we take damage, someone could repair it.” Ross had relaxed some, so she judged that he was only thinking out loud.
“Kellis. Yeah, I’d have liked to have her along for this one too. But she’s too green for something this intense. Just our quick pop into the Tokyo base had her white-faced and edgy. She needs training before she can be useful in high-stress situations.”
“Hopefully in the future,” Raptor added.
“I hope so.” She suspected that Raptor and Ross needed to do more talking, so she pulled away from the wall. “Well, I’m going to go check in on our dear admiral.”
“Better you than me.” Raptor didn’t smile. “One of the perks of being our fearless leader.”
“It’s not a bad job, all in all. I think I’ll keep it.”
Fallon gave Colb the proper bow, not that he deserved it. She’d be glad when she could drop the charade. Showing respect to a man who might cause the PAC’s destruction made her grind her teeth. Never mind what she’d gone through when she’d lost her memory. But she was good at her job and let none of this show.
“I hope you’re well, Admiral.” She didn’t ask to enter his room and he didn’t invite her.
“As well as can be expected. I have to admit, the stress of all this has taken its toll, and I’m spending a good deal of time resting, so I can be ready for what’s ahead.”
“That’s good. We’ll need you.”
“You’ll be able to count on me.” He smiled at her. “I never missed a single one of your competitions, did I?”
She remembered him sitting with her parents, quietly cheering her on at the various combat tournaments she’d competed in as a youth. His face communicated only fondness and pride.
“Never.” She smiled warmly. “Uncle Masumi was always there.”
He chuckled, looking nostalgic. “I haven’t heard you call me that in many years. Funny what this uniform does to us.” He smoothed his hands down the front of his admiral’s uniform.
“Yes. It is.” At least that statement she wholeheartedly meant. She stepped back. “I’ll leave you to rest.”
“Thank you for checking in on me. I hope you know I’ve always been as proud of you as if you were my own daughter.”
She bowed. “Thank you. I can’t tell you what that means to me.”
As she returned to her own quarters, she burned with anger. She didn’t soothe it away. Anger wasn’t always a bad thing. She wanted it. She’d use it for what was to come.
She tried to lie down and sleep, but her body wasn’t having it. Sighing, she sat up and began studying the schematics of Jamestown she had on her voicecom display. Not that the schematics were likely to help, because Krazinski would have altered things. And not that she didn’t already have every detail committed to memory. But she had nothing else to do with her time. She could think of only the job ahead, and she couldn’t afford to work out until exhaustion. She needed her body to be strong and ready.
So she waited out the final hours alone. Ironic, maybe, for someone with two love interests, and one of them sleeping next door. But she would always be herself before she was someone’s lover. She was a soldier. A warrior. A person who got shit done.
She rolled out of her bunk before it was time to relieve Hawk on the bridge. After putting on a clean jumpsuit, she took the long way through the ship.
Long tradition held that a captain toured her ship before a major battle. Fallon was far from a traditional captain, but she felt like the Nefarious belonged to her. She’d crawled through every conduit and memorized every system. She always felt the bridge was hers, and only on loan to anyone else.
She was proud of her ship and her team. Of her service record. Of her attempt to save the PAC. If this was the mission she didn’t come back from, she had no regrets, so long as they saved the PAC.
When she arrived on the bridge, Hawk squinted at her. “Prelin’s ass, you look like you’re ready to chew straight through the hull of Jamestown.”
She grinned. “I am.”
He scowled at her, but she knew it was fake. “You’ve always been the scariest asshole I’ve ever known.”
“And you’ve always been the biggest one I’ve ever known.”
They glared at each other, then broke into laughter.
“Ready?” he asked.
“So ready.” She slid into the pilot’s chair, feeling instantly more powerful.
“Mind if I keep you company?” He gestured toward the chair beside her.
“Not at all. You don’t want to sleep?”
“Who can sleep?” He leaned against the seat and she saw the mania in his
