“A young seraph, named Cuchulain, chancing to pass that way shortly afterwards, saw the threepenny piece peeping brightly from the rocks, and he picked it up.
“He looked at it in astonishment. He turned it over and over, this way and that way. Examined it at the stretch of his arm, and peered minutely at it from two inches distance.
“ ‘I have never in my life seen anything so beautifully wrought,’ said he, and, having stowed it in his pouch along with some other trinkets, he strolled homewards again through the massy gates.
“It was not long until Brien discovered his loss, and suddenly, through the black region, his voice went mounting and brawling.
“ ‘I have been robbed,’ he yelled. ‘I have been robbed in heaven!’
“Having begun to yell he did not stop. Sometimes he was simply angry and made a noise. Sometimes he became sarcastic and would send his query swirling upwards.
“ ‘Who stole the threepenny bit?’ he roared. He addressed the surrounding black space:
“ ‘Who stole the last threepenny bit of a poor man?’
“Again and again his voice pealed upwards. The pains of his habitation lost all their sting for him. His mind had nourishment, and the heat within him vanquished the fumes without. He had a grievance, a righteous cause, he was buoyed and strengthened, nothing could silence him. They tried ingenious devices, all kinds of complicated things, but he paid no heed, and the tormentors were in despair.
“ ‘I hate these sinners from the kingdom of Kerry,’ said the Chief Tormentor, and he sat moodily down on his own circular saw; and that worried him also, for he was clad only in a loincloth.
“ ‘I hate the entire Clann of the Gael,’ said he; ‘why cannot they send them somewhere else?’ and then he started practising again on Brien.
“It was no use. Brien’s query still blared upwards like the sound of the great trump itself. It wakened and rung the rocky caverns, screamed through fissure and funnel, and was battered and slung from pinnacle to crag and up again. Worse! his companions in doom became interested and took up the cry, until at last the uproar became so appalling that the Master himself could not stand it.
“ ‘I have not had a wink of sleep for three nights,’ said that harassed one, and he sent a special embassy to the powers.
“Rhadamanthus was astonished when they arrived. His elbow was leaning on his vast knee, and his heavy head rested on a hand that was acres long, acres wide.
“ ‘What is all this about?’ said he.
“ ‘The Master cannot go to sleep,’ said the spokesman of the embassy, and he grinned as he said it, for it sounded queer even to himself.
“ ‘It is not necessary that he should sleep,’ said Rhadamanthus. ‘I have never slept since time began, and I will never sleep until time is over. But the complaint is curious. What has troubled your master?’
“ ‘Hell is turned upside down and inside out,’ said the fiend. ‘The tormentors are weeping like little children. The principalities are squatting on their hunkers doing nothing. The orders are running here and there fighting each other. The styles are leaning against walls shrugging their shoulders, and the damned are shouting and laughing and have become callous to torment.’
“ ‘It is not my business,’ said the judge.
“ ‘The sinners demand justice,’ said the spokesman.
“ ‘They’ve got it,’ said Rhadamanthus, ‘let them stew in it.’
“ ‘They refuse to stew,’ replied the spokesman, wringing his hands.
“Rhadamanthus sat up.
“ ‘It is an axiom in law,’ said he, ‘that however complicated an event may be, there can never be more than one person at the extreme bottom of it. Who is the person?’
“ ‘It is one Brien of the O’Brien nation, late of the kingdom of Kerry. A bad one! He got the maximum punishment a week ago.’
“For the first time in his life Rhadamanthus was disturbed. He scratched his head, and it was the first time he had ever done that either.
“ ‘You say he got the maximum,’ said Rhadamanthus, ‘then it’s a fix! I have damned him forever, and better or worse than that cannot be done. It is none of my business,’ said he angrily, and he had the deputation removed by force.
“But that did not ease the trouble. The contagion spread until ten million billions of voices were chanting in unison, and uncountable multitudes were listening between their pangs.
“ ‘Who stole the threepenny bit? Who stole the threepenny bit?’
“That was still their cry. Heaven rang with it as well as hell. Space was filled with that rhythmic tumult. Chaos and empty Nox had a new discord added to their elemental throes. Another memorial was drafted below, showing that unless the missing coin was restored to its owner hell would have to close its doors. There was a veiled menace in the memorial also, for Clause 6 hinted that if hell was allowed to go by the board heaven might find itself in some jeopardy thereafter.
“The document was despatched and considered. In consequence a proclamation was sent through all the wards of Paradise, calling on whatever person, archangel, seraph, cherub, or acolyte, had found a threepenny piece since midday of the tenth August then instant, that the same person, archangel, seraph, cherub, or acolyte, should deliver the said threepenny piece to Rhadamanthus at his Court, and should receive in return a free pardon and a receipt.
“The coin was not delivered.
“The young seraph, Cuchulain, walked about like a person who was strange to himself. He was not tormented: he was angry. He frowned, he cogitated and fumed. He drew one golden curl through his fingers until it was lank and drooping; save the end only, that was still a ripple of gold. He put the end in his mouth and strode moodily chewing it. And every day his feet turned in the same direction—down the long entrance boulevard, through the mighty gates,
