He knew of them more legends and more lives
Than be of goodë wivës in the Bible.
For, trust me well, it is an impossíble
That any clerk will speakë good of wives,
(But if1984 it be of holy saintës’ lives)
Nor of none other woman never the mo’.
Who painted the lión, tell it me, who?
By God, if women haddë written stories,
As clerkës have within their oratóries,
They would have writ of men more wickedness
Than all the mark of Adam1985 may redress.
The children of Mercury and of Venus,1986
Be in their working full contrarious.
Mercury loveth wisdom and sciénce,
And Venus loveth riot and dispence.1987
And for their diverse dispositión,
Each falls in other’s exaltatión.1988
As thus, God wot, Mercúry is desolate
In Pisces, where Venus is exaltáte,
And Venus falls where Mercury is raised.
Therefore no woman by no clerk is praised.
The clerk, when he is old, and may not do
Of Venus’ works not worth his oldë shoe,
Then sits he down, and writes in his dotage,
That women cannot keep their marriáge.
But now to purpose, why I toldë thee
That I was beaten for a book, pardie.
Upon a night Jenkin, that was our sire,1989
Read on his book, as he sat by the fire,
Of Eva first, that for her wickedness
Was all mankind brought into wretchedness,
For which that Jesus Christ himself was slain,
That bought us with his heartë-blood again.
Lo here express of women may ye find
That woman was the loss of all mankind.
Then read he me how Samson lost his hairs
Sleeping, his leman cut them with her shears,
Through whichë treason lost he both his eyen.
Then read he me, if that I shall not lien,
Of Hercules, and of his Dejanire,
That caused him to set himself on fire.
Nothing forgot he of the care and woe
That Socrates had with his wivës two;
How Xantippe cast piss upon his head.
This silly man sat still, as he were dead,
He wip’d his head, and no more durst he sayn,
But, “Ere the thunder stint1990 there cometh rain.”
Of Phasiphaë, that was queen of Crete,
For shrewedness1991 he thought the talë sweet.
Fy, speak no more, it is a grisly thing,
Of her horrible lust and her likíng.
Of Clytemnestra, for her lechery
That falsely made her husband for to die,
He read it with full good devotión.
He told me eke, for what occasión
Amphiorax at Thebes lost his life:
My husband had a legend of his wife
Eryphilé, that for an ouche1992 of gold
Had privily unto the Greekës told,
Where that her husband hid him in a place,
For which he had at Thebes sorry grace.
Of Luna told he me, and of Lucie;
They bothë made their husbands for to die,
That one for love, that other was for hate.
Luna her husband on an ev’ning late
Empoison’d had, for that she was his foe:
Lucia liquorish lov’d her husband so,
That, for he should always upon her think,
She gave him such a manner1993 lovë-drink,
That he was dead before it were the morrow:
And thus algatës1994 husbands haddë sorrow.
Then told he me how one Latumeus
Complained to his fellow Arius
That in his garden growed such a tree,
On which he said how that his wivës three
Hanged themselves for heart dispiteous.
“O leve1995 brother,” quoth this Arius,
“Give me a plant of thilkë1996 blessed tree,
And in my garden planted shall it be.”
Of later date of wivës hath he read,
That some have slain their husbands in their bed,
And let their lechour dight them all the night,
While that the corpse lay on the floor upright:
And some have driven nails into their brain,
While that they slept, and thus they have them slain:
Some have them given poison in their drink:
He spake more harm than heartë may bethink.
And therewithal he knew of more provérbs,
Than in this world there groweth grass or herbs.
“Better (quoth he) thine habitatión
Be with a lion, or a foul dragón,
Than with a woman using for to chide.
Better (quoth he) high in the roof abide,
Than with an angry woman in the house,
They be so wicked and contrarioús:
They hatë that their husbands loven aye.”
He said, “A woman cast her shame away
When she cast off her smock;” and farthermo’,
“A fair woman, but1997 she be chaste also,
Is like a gold ring in a sowë’s nose.”
Who couldë ween,1998 or who couldë suppose
The woe that in mine heart was, and the pine?1999
And when I saw that he would never fine2000
To readen on this cursed book all night,
All suddenly three leavës have I plight2001
Out of his book, right as he read, and eke
I with my fist so took him on the cheek,
That in our fire he backward fell adown.
And he up start, as doth a wood lión,
And with his fist he smote me on the head,
That on the floor I lay as I were dead.
And when he saw how still that there I lay,
He was aghast, and would have fled away,
Till at the last out of my swoon I braid,2002
“Oh, hast thou slain me, thou false thief?” I said,
“And for my land thus hast thou murder’d me?
Ere I be dead, yet will I kissë thee.”
And near he came, and kneeled fair adown,
And saidë, “Dearë sister Alisoun,
As help me God, I shall thee never smite:
That I have done it is thyself to wite,2003
Forgive it me, and that I thee beseek.”2004
And yet eftsoons2005 I hit him on the cheek,
And saidë, “Thief, thus much am I awreak.2006
Now will I die, I may no longer speak.”
But at the last, with muchë care and woe
We fell accorded2007 by ourselvës two:
He gave me all the bridle in mine hand
To have the governance of house and land,
And of his tongue, and of his hand also.
I made him burn his book anon right tho.2008
And when that I had gotten unto me
By mast’ry all the sovereignëty,
And that he said, “Mine owen truë wife,
Do as thee list,2009 the term of
