“You will pardon me, madam,” said she, “for not having before paid my respects to so amiable a neighbor; but we English people always keep up that reserve which is the characteristic of our nation wherever we go. I have taken the liberty to bring you a few cucumbers, for I had observed you had none in your garden.”
Charlotte, though naturally polite and well-bred, was so confused she could hardly speak. Her kind visitor endeavored to relieve her by not noticing her embarrassment. “I am come, madam,” continued she, “to request you will spend the day with me. I shall be alone; and as we are both strangers in this country, we may hereafter be extremely happy in each other’s friendship.”
“Your friendship, madam,” said Charlotte, blushing, “is an honor to all who are favored with it. Little as I have seen of this part of the world, I am no stranger to Mrs. Beauchamp’s goodness of heart and known humanity; but my friendship—” She paused, glanced her eye upon her own visible situation, and in spite of her endeavors to suppress them, burst into tears.
Mrs. Beauchamp guessed the source from whence those tears flowed. “You seem unhappy, madam,” said she: “shall I be thought worthy of your confidence? Will you entrust me with the cause of your sorrow, and rest on my assurances to exert my utmost power to serve you.” Charlotte returned a look of gratitude, but could not speak, and Mrs. Beauchamp continued—“My heart was interested in your behalf the first moment I saw you; and I only lament I had not made earlier overtures towards an acquaintance; but I flatter myself you will henceforth consider me as your friend.”
“Oh, madam!” cried Charlotte, “I have forfeited the good opinion of all my friends; I have forsaken them, and undone myself.”
“Come, come, my dear,” said Mrs. Beauchamp, “you must not indulge these gloomy thoughts: you are not, I hope, so miserable as you imagine yourself: endeavor to be composed, and let me be favored with your company at dinner, when, if you can bring yourself to think me your friend and repose a confidence in me, I am ready to convince you it shall not be abused.” She then arose and bade her good morning.
At the dining hour, Charlotte repaired to Mrs. Beauchamp’s, and during dinner assumed as composed an aspect as possible; but when the cloth was removed, she summoned all her resolution, and determined to make Mrs. Beauchamp acquainted with every circumstance preceding her unfortunate elopement, and the earnest desire she had to quit a way of life so repugnant to her feelings.
With the benignant aspect of an angel of mercy, did Mrs. Beauchamp listen to the artless tale: she was shocked to the soul to find how large a share La Rue had in the seduction of this amiable girl, and a tear fell when she reflected so vile a woman was now the wife of her father. When Charlotte had finished, she gave her a little time to collect her scattered spirits, and then asked her if she had never written to her friends.
“Oh, yes, madam,” said she, “frequently: but I have broke their hearts; they are all either dead, or have cast me off forever, for I have never received a single line from them.”
“I rather suspect,” said Mrs. Beauchamp, “they have never had your letters: but suppose you were to hear from them, and they were willing to receive you, would you then leave this cruel Montraville, and return to them?”
“Would I?” said Charlotte, clasping her hands; “would not the poor sailor tossed on a tempestuous ocean, threatened every moment with death, gladly return to the shore he had left to trust to its deceitful calmness? Oh, my dear madam, I would return, though to do it I were obliged to walk barefoot over a burning desert, and beg a scanty pittance of each traveler to support my existence. I would endure it all cheerfully, could I but once more see my dear, blessed mother, hear her pronounce my pardon, and bless me before I died; but alas! I shall never see her more; she has blotted the ungrateful Charlotte from her remembrance, and I shall sink to the grave loaded with hers and my father’s curse.”
Mrs. Beauchamp endeavored to soothe her. “You shall write to them again,” said she, “and I will see that the letter is sent by the first packet that sails for England; in the meantime, keep up your spirits, and hope everything by daring to deserve it.”
She then turned the conversation, and Charlotte, having taken a cup of tea, wished her benevolent friend a good evening.
XXII
Sorrows of the Heart
When Charlotte got home she endeavored to collect her thoughts, and took up a pen, in order to address those dear parents, whom, in spite of her errors, she still loved with the utmost tenderness, but vain was every effort to write with the least coherence.
Her tears fell so fast, they almost blinded her; and as she proceeded to describe her unhappy situation, she became so agitated that she was obliged to give over the attempt, and retire to bed, where, overcome with the fatigue her mind had undergone, she fell into a slumber which greatly refreshed her, and she arose in the morning with spirits more adequate to the painful task she had to perform, and after several attempts, at length concluded the following letter to her mother:
“New York.
“To Mrs. Temple:
“Will my once kind, my ever-beloved mother, deign to receive a letter from her guilty, but repentant child? or has she, justly incensed at my ingratitude, driven the unhappy Charlotte from her remembrance? Alas! thou much injured mother, shouldst thou even disown me, I dare not complain, because I know I have deserved it: but yet, believe me, guilty as I am, and cruelly as I have disappointed the hopes of the fondest parents that
