“All this means, madam,” interrupted Mangogul, “that you put yourself at the head of the censors.”
“And if your opinion be received,” continued Selim, “the empire is threatened with the decay of good taste; barbarism will revive, and we are in danger of relapsing into the ignorance of the ages of Mamurrha and Orondado.”
“My lord, pray have no such apprehensions. I hate peevish humors, and will not add to their number. Besides, I have the glory of his highness too much at heart, to think of ever attempting to tarnish the splendor of his reign. But if credit were given to us, is it not true, Mr. Ricaric, that literature would shine with greater lustre?”
“How,” said Mangogul, “have you not a memorial on this subject to present to my Seneschal?”
“No, sir,” answered Ricaric; “but after having thanked your highness in behalf of the Literati, for the new inspector, which you have given them; I would most humbly remonstrate to your Seneschal, that the choice of learned men appointed to revise manuscripts is an affair of great nicety: that this trust is committed to persons, who seem to me very much inferior to their employ; and from thence results a crowd of evil effects, such as curtailing good works, cramping the best geniuses, who not being at liberty to write in their own way, either write not at all, or send their productions with considerable sums to foreigners; giving a bad opinion of those topics which are prohibited to be discussed, and a thousand other inconveniencies, which it would be too tedious to mention to your highness. I would advise him to retrench the pensions of certain literary leaches, who are always craving unmercifully; I mean glossators, antiquaries, commentators, and others of this stamp, who would be very useful, if they did their business well; but who are got into the wretched custom of passing over obscure places, and of dwelling upon passages that admit of no difficulty. I would have him be very attentive to suppress almost all posthumous works; and not to suffer the memory of a great author to be tarnished by the covetousness of a bookseller, who collects and publishes, a long time after a man’s death, such works as he had condemned to oblivion in his lifetime.”
“And I,” continued the favorite, “would point out to him a small number of men of distinguished merit, such as Mr. Ricaric, on whom he may bestow your benefactions. Is it not somewhat surprising, that the poor man has no provision made for him, while the precious chiromancer of the Manimonbanda receives a thousand sequins a year from your treasury.”
“Well, madam,” answered Mangogul, “I assign Mr. Ricaric the like sum on my coffers, in consideration of the wonderful things you tell me of him.”
“Mr. Ricaric,” said the favorite, “I also must do something for you: in your favor I sacrifice the small resentment of my self-love; and in consideration of the recompence which Mangogul has granted to your merit, I forget the injury he has done me.”
“Pray, madam, may I ask you what that injury is?” replied Mangogul.
“You may, Sir, and I will tell you. You yourself make us embark in a conversation on the Belles-Lettres: you begin by a piece of modern eloquence, which is not extraordinary; and when, to oblige you, we prepare to pursue the disagreeable argument which you have started, you are seized with uneasiness and yawning, you teize yourself in your seat, you change your posture a hundred times, without finding one easy one: tired infine of keeping your countenance, though a sad one, you come to a sudden resolution, you get up and disappear: and then, whither do you go? Perhaps to give ear to a Toy!”
“I own the fact, madam, but I see nothing in it that should give offence. If a man happens to be disgusted at fine things, and amuse himself with hearing bad, so much the worse for him. This unjust preference takes nothing from the merit of what he has quitted: he only declares himself a bad judge. To this I could add, madam, that while you were labouring hard at Selim’s conversion, I was working with no better success to procure you a castle. Infine, if I must be culpable, since you have pronounc’d me so, I can assure you that you have had your revenge at the very time.”
“Pray, how that?” said the favorite. “Thus it is,” answered the Sultan. “In order to refresh myself from the fatigue of the academical sitting which I had undergone, I went to examine some Toys.”
“Well, prince—”
“Well, I never heard such insipid creatures as the two which I light upon.”
“This gives me the highest joy,” replied the favorite.—They both fell to talking an unintelligible language. I have perfectly well retained everything they said; but let me die, if I understand a word of it.
XXXVI
Eighteenth and Nineteenth Trials of the Ring
The Flatted Spheroïd, and Girgiro the Entangled: Catch Who Can
“That is singular,” continued the favorite. “Till this moment, I always imagined, that the chief fault found with Toys, was their speaking too plainly.”
“Oh! madam,” replied Mangogul, “these two are not of that tribe; understand them who can.
“You know that little crumpling of woman, whose head is sunk into her shoulders, whose arms are hardly to be seen, and whose legs are so short, and her belly so lank, that one might mistake her for a hedgehog, for a clumsy ill-develop’d embryo, who bears the nickname of the flatted Spheroïd; who has filled her head with a notion that Brama called her to the study of geometry, because he has given her the figure of a bowl; and who consequently might have chosen the profession of artillery: for considering her make, she must have issued out of nature’s bosom, as a bullet out of the mouth of
