and that his dead body smelt of precious spiceries? Here could I cite the case of Julius Caesar and Pompeius, of whom the one, besides the victories which he won in the civil wars, did fifty times engage in pitched battles, and defeated and slew 1,520,000 men: while the other, besides the taking of 940 ships from the pirates, did from the Alps to the uttermost parts of Spain capture and subdue 376 cities and towns. Lucius Siccius, the Roman people’s tribune, was engaged in 120 pitched battles, and did eight times conquer them that challenged him: he could show forty-five scars on his body, and those all in front and none behind: with nine generals-in-chief did he enter Rome in their triumphs, which they did clearly earn by their courage. Yea, and Manlius Capitolinus’s honour in war were no less had he not at the end of his life himself abased his fame: for he too could show thirty-three scars, without counting that he once did alone save the capitol with all its treasures from the French. What of Hercules the Strong and Theseus and the rest, whose undying praise it is well-nigh impossible both to describe and to tell of? Should not these be honoured in their descendants? But I will pass over war and weapons and turn to the arts, which, though they seem to make less noise in the world, yet do achieve great fame for the masters of them. What skill do we find in Zeuxis, which by his ingenious brain and skilful hand did deceive the very birds of the air; and likewise in Apelles, who did paint a Venus so natural, so fine, so exquisite, and in all features so nice and so delicate that all bachelors did fall in love with her! Doth not Plutarch tell us how Archimedes did draw with one hand and by a single rope through the midst of the marketplace at Syracuse a great ship laden with merchants’ ware as if he had but led a packhorse by the bridle? which thing not twenty oxen, to say nothing of two hundred calves like thee, could have effected. And should not this honest craftsman be endowed with a title of honour fitted to his art? This Archimedes made a mirror wherewith he could set on fire an enemy’s warship in mid-sea. And who would not praise him which first did invent letters? Yea, who would not exalt him far above all artists who devised the noble and, for all the world, useful art of printing? If Ceres was accounted a goddess because she is said to have invented agriculture and the grinding of corn, why were it not fair that others should have their praise with titles of honour allowed them? Yet in truth it mattereth little whether thou, thou stupid calf, canst take such things into thy unreasoning bullock’s brain or not. For ’tis with thee as with the dog which lay in the manger and would not let the ox eat of the hay, yet could not enjoy the same himself: thou art capable of no honour, and for that very cause thou grudgest such to those that do deserve it.”
With all this I found myself sorely bestead, yet made answer: “These mighty deeds were indeed highly to be praised were they not accomplished with the destruction and damage of other men. But what manner of praise is this which is stained with the bloodshed of so many innocents; and what manner of nobility that which is achieved and won by the ruin of so many thousand other folk! And as concerns the arts, what be they save merely vanities and follies! Yea, they be as vain, idle, and unprofitable as the title of honour which might come to any man from these craftsmen; for they do but serve the greed, or the lust, or the luxury, or the corruption of others, like to those vile guns which lately I beheld on their half-wagons. Yea, and well could we spare both printing and writing, according to the sentence and opinion of that holy man who held that the whole wide world was book enough for him, wherein to study the wonders of his Creator and thereupon to recognise the almighty power of God.”
XI
Of the Toilsome and Dangerous Office of a Governor
Then my lord would also have his jest with me, and said: “I do well perceive that because thou trustest not thyself to be of gentle birth, therefore thou despisest the honourable titles of gentility.” “Sir,” answered I, “if I could at this very hour enter upon your place of honour, yet would I not take it.”
My lord laughed and said: “That I believe, for for the ox his oaten straw is well enough: but an thou hadst a high spirit such as hearts of gentles should have, then wouldst thou with zeal aspire to high honours and dignities. I for my part count it no small thing that fortune raises me above my fellows.”
Then did I sigh, and “O toilsome felicity!” said I. “Sir, I assure you, ye are the most miserable man in Hanau.”
“How so; how so, calf?” said my lord. “Give me thy reasons, for such I find not in myself.”
So I answered, “If you know not and feel not that you are Governor in Hanau, and with how many cares and uneasiness in that account burdened, then either the devouring thirst of honour blinds you or else are you of iron and quite insensible; ye have, ’tis true, the right to command, and whosoever comes within your ken the same must obey you. But do they serve ye for naught? Are ye not all men’s servant? Must ye not specially take care for each and all? See, ye are girded round with foes, and the safeguarding of this stronghold depends on you alone. Ever must ye be devising how to do some damage to your opposites: and
