Uncivil War
Allison, Ill., Feb. 3.
Brother Charley. Well Charley this is a funny World where a man has neighbors on 1 side of you that you couldent fine no better peopl no wheres and on the other side peopl that they aint nothing to mean and small for them to do and allways trying to make you missable.
A man name Martin and his wife is the peopl that we got liveing the next door on the left and I and Martins been going down town on the same train to gather and thats the way how we got aquanted so the other night I and him happen to get on the same train comeing home and set in the same seat and I ast him why dident him and his Mrs. come over some night and play cards and he says he dident need nothing to put him to sleep and I guess he ment I would probily fill him up with beer but beffore we got home he promused to bring the Mrs. and come over and last night was the night they come. Well Charley you ought to see this here Mrs. Martin. She aint nothing but a girl you might say and prety as a pitcher and dresses as good is a course girl and you could set down and read the evening paper with out no electrick light if she was in the rm. with her dimonds.
She took quiet a shine to Grace right a way and ast her did she sew her own close or where did she get them and Grace says no in deed she hadent had no time to sew her own close sence 3 yrs. a go when little Ed was born and Mrs. Martin says she thot may be the close was made beffore that and the reason she thot Grace must of made them was on acct. of she never seen nothing like them in the stores wile she was shopping. So of corse Grace was tickeled to deth like all the wommen when you swell them up a bout there close and her and Mrs. Martin got a long fine but Mrs. Martin dont play cinch so we set down and played rummy and Martin insist it we should play for $.01 a pt. to make it intrusting so we played a wile and I loose $1.60 and Grace loose $.80 but it was worth the money the fun we had.
So after we was threw plain cards and we was seting a round drinking a bottle of beer and all of a sudden they was a crash on the back porch and I and Martin run out there and a cat had knocked the garbidge pale over and I called Grace to see whos cat it was and she says it was Hamiltons cat the peopl that lives the next door to us on the other side then the Martins lives on. And Grace says the same cat had been doing it right a long because all most evry a.m. she found the pale laying on the porch so I says why dont they feed the cat at home and she wouldn’t half to go prolling a round the neighbors hood to get some thing to eat and then Martin says may be the Hamiltons was sore at us and starved there cat on the purpose so as she would come over and undisterb us evry night and he ast me if Id gave Hamilton any reason to get sore at me that would make him pull off a trick like that.
So I says well may be Hamilton was sore at me but he dident have no more reason to be sore at me then me to be sore at him because it was a horse a peace so Martin ast me to tell him a bout it so I told him that we had gave a party 1 night and hadent ast the Hamiltons on acct. of them not calling on Grace after she had payed them a call when we 1st movved out here so Hamilton and his wife got sore on acct. of us not asking them to our party and 1 of the boys that come to the party got to many drinks under his belt and done the foxy trot out on the side walk and Hamilton sent for the night watch man and had me arested for disterbing the piece and so a little wile latter to get back at him I fixed it up with the sherrifs ofice to send 1 of the deputys out to Hamiltons house 1 p.m. when Mrs. Hamilton was giveing a party and plain action bridge whist for money and the deputy told Mrs. Hamilton she was arested for runing a gambleing house and of corse nothing come out of it accept that they was a peace in the papers a bout it and I onily done it to get even.
So Martin says probily Hamilton suspect it me of bean the 1 that sent the deputy out there and was trying to make things missable for me by starveing there cat so she would yowel a round our house all night and Martin says if he was me he would lern Hamilton a lesson and I says how and he says for me to think up some trick to play on him so as he would quitt monking with me. So Im going to try and think up some thing and I would shoot his cat onily it aint the cats falt that there starveing her to
