If I Had a Father

o’ yours, I wouldn’t cry then. He’s at the bottom of it! I don’t see myself what’s the use of fallin’ in love. One man’s as much of a fool as another to me. But you must go to bed. You ain’t fit. You’ll be easier when you’ve got your frock off. There! Why, child, you’re all of a tremble!⁠—And no wonder, wi’ nothing on her blessed body but her frock and her shimmy! Mattie Don’t take off my frock, Sue. I must get on with my work. Susan Lie down a bit, anyhow. I’ll lie at your back, and you’ll soon be as warm’s a toast. Mattie lies down. O Lord! she’s dead! Her heart’s stopped beatin’. Runs out of the room. A moment of silence. A tap at the door. Constance peeps in, then enters, with a basket. Constance Miss Pearson!⁠—She’s asleep. Goes near. Good heavens! Lays her hand on her. No. Takes a bottle from her basket, finds a cup, and pours into it. Take this, Miss Pearson; it will do you good. There now! You’ll find something else in the basket. Mattie I don’t want anything. I had so nearly got away! Why did you bring me back? Constance Life is good! Mattie It is not good. How dare you do it? Why keep a miserable creature alive? Life ain’t to us what it is to you. The grave is the only place we have any right to. Constance If I could make your life worth something to you⁠— Mattie You make my life worth to me! You don’t know what you’re saying, miss. Sitting up. Constance I think I do. Mattie I will not owe my life to you. I could love you, though⁠—your hands are so white, and your look so brave. That’s what comes of being born a lady. We never have a chance. Constance Miss Pearson⁠—Mattie, I would call you, if you wouldn’t be offended⁠— Mattie Me offended, miss!⁠—I’ve not got life enough for it. I only want my father and my mother, and a long sleep.⁠—If I had been born rich⁠— Constance You might have been miserable all the same. Listen, Mattie. I will tell you my story⁠—I was once as badly off as you⁠—worse in some ways⁠—ran about the streets without shoes to my feet, and hardly a frock to cover me. Mattie La, miss! you don’t say so! It’s not possible! Look at you! Constance Indeed, I tell you the truth. I know what hunger is too⁠—well enough. My father was a silkweaver in Spitalfields. When he died, I didn’t know where to go. But a gentleman⁠— Mattie Oh! a gentleman!⁠—Fiercely. Why couldn’t you be content with one, then? Constance I don’t understand you. Mattie I dare say not! There! take your basket. I’ll die afore a morsel passes my lips. There! Go away, miss. Constance Aside. Poor girl! she is delirious. I must ask William to fetch a doctor. Exit. Mattie I wish my hands were as white as hers. Enter Susan, followed by Col. Gervaise. Constance behind. Susan Mattie! dear Mattie! this gentleman⁠—don’t be vexed⁠—I couldn’t help him bein’ a gentleman; I was cryin’ that bad, and I didn’t see no one come up to me, and when he spoke to me, it made me jump, and I couldn’t help answerin’ of him⁠—he spoke so civil and soft like, and me nigh mad! I thought you was dead, Mattie. He says he’ll see us righted, Mattie. Col. Gervaise I’ll do what I can, if you will tell me what’s amiss. Susan Oh, everything’s amiss⁠—everything!⁠—Who was that went out, Mattie⁠—this minute⁠—as we come in? Mattie Miss Lacordère. Susan Her imperence! Well! I should die of shame if I was her. Mattie She’s an angel, Susan. There’s her basket. I told her to take it away, but she would leave it. Susan Peeping into the basket. Oh, my! Ain’t this nice? You must have a bit, Mattie. Mattie Not one mouthful. You wouldn’t have me, Susan! Susan I ain’t so peticlar eating a great mouthful. You really must, Mattie. Goes on eating. Col. Gervaise Don’t tease her. We’ll get something for her presently. And don’t you eat too much⁠—all at once. Susan I think she’d like a chop, sir.⁠—There’s that boy, Bill, again!⁠—Always when he ain’t wanted! Enter Bill. Bill Aside to Susan. What’s the row? What’s that ’ere gent up to? I’ve been an’ had enough o’ gents. They’re a bad lot. I been too much for one on ’em, though. I ha’ run him down.⁠—And, Mattie, I’ve found the old gen’leman. Mattie My father, Bill? Bill That’s it percisely! Right as a trivet⁠—he is! Mattie Susan! take hold of me. My heart’s going again. Bill Lord! what’s up wi’ Mattie? She do look dreadful. Susan You been an’ upset her, you clumsy boy! Here⁠—run and fetch a sausage or two, and a⁠— Col. Gervaise No, no! That will never do. Susan Them’s for Bill and me, sir. I was a goin’ on, sir.⁠—And, Bill, a chop⁠—a nice chop. But Lord! how are we to cook it, with never a fryin’-pan, or a bit o’ fire to set it on! Col. Gervaise You’d never think of doing a chop for an invalid in the frying-pan? Susan Certainly not, sir⁠—we ’ain’t got one. Everything’s up the spout an’ over the top. Run, Bill. A bit of cold chicken, and two pints o’ bottled stout. There’s the money the gen’leman give me.⁠—’T ’ain’t no Miss Lackodare’s, Mattie. Bill I’ll trouble no gen’leman to perwide for my family⁠—obleeged all the same, sir. Mattie never wos a dub at dewourin’, but I’ll get her some’at toothsome. I favours grub myself. Col. Gervaise I’ll go with you, Bill. I want to talk to you. Bill Well, I ’ain’t no objection⁠—so be you wants to talk friendly, sir. Col. Gervaise Good night. I’ll come and see you tomorrow. Susan God bless you, sir. You’ve saved both on our lives. I was a goin’ to drown myself, Mattie⁠—I really was this time. Wasn’t I, sir? Col. Gervaise Well, you looked like it⁠—that is all I can say. You shall do it next time⁠—so