V
In Which We Pay the Aunt an Informal Visit
I was there to the minute. For a while after Drummond had gone, I told myself that I would have nothing more to do with the business, but it was a feeble struggle. The excitement of the thing had got hold of me, and poor old Stevens—my clerk—had never seemed so intolerably prosy and long-winded.
“Splendid,” said Drummond as I walked in. “That completes us. Stockton, this is Ted Jerningham, a lad of repulsive morals but distinctly quick on the uptake.”
He brought our numbers up to six, and when I look back now and think of the odds against which, in all ignorance, we were pitting ourselves I could almost laugh. And yet I know one thing. Even had Drummond realised what those odds were, it would not have made an iota of difference to him. With him it was always a question of the more the merrier.
“We will now run over the plan of operations,” he went on, when I had removed two dogs from a chair and sat down. “I’ve told these birds what I told you this afternoon, Stockton, so it only remains to discuss tonight. In the first place we’ve had a stroke of luck which is a good omen. The street running parallel to Ashworth Gardens is called Jersey Street. And the back of Number 13 Jersey Street looks on to the back of 12 Ashworth Gardens. Moreover, the female who owns Number 13 Jersey Street lets rooms, and I have taken those rooms. In fact, I’ve taken the whole bally house for a week—rent paid in advance—for a party of divinity students who have come up to this maelstrom of vice to see the Mint and Madame Tussaud’s and generally be inconceivably naughty.
“Separating the backs of the houses are two brown patches of mud with a low wall in the middle which a child of four could climb with ease. And since there is no moon tonight, there oughtn’t to be much difficulty in getting over that wall unseen—should the necessity arise.
“And since the spectacle of four of you dashing down the stairs and out of the old girl’s back door might rouse unworthy suspicions in her breast, I have stipulated that we must have the use of a ground floor sitting-room at the back of the house. She doesn’t usually let it, but I assured her that the wild distractions of Jersey Street would seriously interfere with our meditations.”
“Four?” interrupted Jerningham. “Why four?”
“I’m coming to that,” said Drummond. “I want someone with me in Number 12. And since the sport will probably be there, I think it’s only fair to let Stockton have it, as this is really his show.”
A chorus of assent greeted his remark, and for the life of me I couldn’t help laughing. I had formed a mental picture of Drummond’s pal of the afternoon with the whin bushes sprouting from his face, and I could see him being my portion for the evening. But the whole tone of the meeting was one of the most serious gravity: it might have been a discussion before a shoot when the principal guest was being given the best position. So I suppressed the laugh and accepted with becoming gratitude.
“Right,” said Drummond. “Then that’s settled. Now to the next point.”
He picked up from his desk a cowl-shaped black mask, and regarded it reminiscently.
“Lucky I kept a few of these: do you remember ’em, you fellows? Stockton wouldn’t, of course.”
He turned to me.
“Years ago we had an amusing little show rounding up Communists and other unwashed people of that type. We called ourselves the Black Gang, and it was a great sport while it lasted.”
“Good Heavens!” I said, staring at him. “I dimly remember reading something about it in the papers. I thought the whole thing was a hoax.”
They all laughed.
“That’s when we chloroformed your pal MacIver and left him to cool on his own doorstep. Happy days, laddie: happy days. However, taking everything into account, the going at the moment might be worse. And it struck me that these things might come in handy tonight. If we wear our old black gauntlets, and these masks well tucked in round the collar, it will afford us some protection if they start any monkey tricks with that filthy juice of theirs. At any rate there is no harm in having them with us in case of accidents: they don’t take up much room and we can easily slip them into our pockets. So it all boils down to this. Stockton and I will deposit you four in Jersey Street, where you will take up a firm position in the back sitting-room. Bearing in mind that you are destined for the Church, and the penchant of landladies for keyholes, you will refrain from your usual conversation. Under no circumstances is Toby to tell any of his stories, nor is Ruff’s Guide to be placed in a prominent position on the table when she brings you in your warm milk at ten. Rather should there be an attitude of devotion: possibly a notebook or two in which you are entering up your impressions of the Wallace Collection—”
A struggling mass of men at length grew quiescent in a corner, with Drummond underneath.
“It takes five of us to do it,” panted Darrell to me. “And last time the chandelier in the room below fell on Denny’s head.”
“That being quite clear,” pursued Drummond from his place on the floor, “we will pass on. Should you hear shouts as of men in pain from the house opposite; or
