She shook her head. ‘I was surprised though. It sounded as if you went out of your way to find trouble.’
‘I did, I suppose.’
‘Why?’
‘Something to do with the way things were with Cyn and me. Now I want to stay in one piece, all systems go. Mind you, a few hand jobs wouldn’t be so bad.’
‘Did you do it that way with Cyn?”
It was the first time she’d ever asked me about my sexual past. I hadn’t asked much about her and Michael either, but, from what I’d heard of him, it sounded as if he’d hardly have the time. ‘No,’ I said.
‘What about with Ailsa?’
I’d told her a bit about Ailsa. I could hardly avoid it; there were things she’d given me lying around the house. ‘No’, I said. ‘Not with Ailsa either. Look, where’s this heading? What’s wrong?’
‘Oh, I don’t know. I just feel shitty. You getting all banged up like this. And the flats…’
This seemed like safer ground. ‘How’s that going?’
She didn’t answer for a while. She stared out at the expensive view and I had to scratch her palm to bring her round. ‘Hey,’ I said.
‘Sorry. Well, I found one I like.’
‘Good. Where is it?’
‘Bondi.’
‘Bondi!’
‘Tamarama, actually.’
‘Jesus, Helen, that’s miles away.’
‘I really like it. It has this big balcony and a view of the water.’
I felt depressed; I’d envisaged her across the street or over the back fence, not half an hour away. ‘What sort of a place? Units or what?’
‘It’s a big block. Eighty flats. It looks like one of those places along the coast in Spain, but not as flash. You know?’
‘No.’
‘I knew you’d be against it.’
‘All those joints have concrete cancer, did you know?’
‘What?’
‘They were built with crummy concrete back in the sixties. That’d be about the vintage wouldn’t it?’
‘Yes.’ Our hands had moved apart now and her face was setting into hard lines. Impatience was here with hostility just over the hill, but I couldn’t stop myself.
I said, ‘I’ve heard about these places. They’re all going to fall down in ten years unless…’
‘Unless what?’
‘Unless everyone in them kicks in lots of dough and has the job fixed.’
She’d turned her head away and was examining the view again. ‘It was cheap,’ she said softly. ‘I thought it was cheap.’
I felt crummy of course. My eye was aching and my throat was dry. I was hungry and thirsty; the sexual feeling had gone, leaving us washed up on separate beaches.
‘I’m sorry, love. I could be wrong.’
She stood up. ‘Yep, you might be. I’ll check it out on Monday. Well, I’d better be off. Dr Stivens’ll be here soon.’
‘Mister Stivens.’
‘You’re the expert.’ She bent and kissed my cheek: the touch thrilled me and I wanted to unsay everything. Shit, why couldn’t I move to Bondi? What was sacred about Glebe? ‘Helen, I could…”
‘Bye, Cliff. I’ll come and get you at ten tomorrow.’
‘We’ll go and look at your flat.’
She smiled from the door. ‘Have a nice suture adjustment. Bye.’
Stivens arrived with light and mirrors and surgical gloves. He took off the patch, put drops in my eye and fiddled for a few minutes. I didn’t feel a thing.
‘Good,’ he said. ‘Not everyone can take that.’
‘I couldn’t say I enjoyed it. What’s the outlook? Sorry, I can’t seem to stop saying things about looking.’
‘It’s a common response. The prognosis is very good. Look after yourself…’
‘You’re doing it too.’
He smiled. ‘Take care. Use these drops I ‘m going to give you as often as you like. When you need them. Keep it covered at night and try not to lie on it. I’d like to see you in a week.’
‘No lasting damage then?’
‘You were lucky.’ He packed his bag. ‘You said some strange things under the anaesthetic, Mr Hardy.’
‘Like what?’
‘You talked about Bermagui. Lovely spot, I’ve got a small place there I get down to now and then. Have you got a place on the coast?’
I shook my head which hurt a lot. I winced.
‘You’ll have to watch that. No violent movements for a couple of weeks.’
‘Sex?’
‘Gently does it.’
‘Sometimes,’ I said. ‘Well, thank you. All I have to do now is pay for it all.’
He busied himself with his bag; they never like to discuss the sordid side. ‘You have medical insurance surely, in your profession?’
‘No.’
‘Most unwise. Well, I suppose you sustained the injury in the line of duty. Your employer could be liable.’
‘Maybe. Thank you, Mr Stivens.’
‘Call my rooms on Monday for an appointment.’
‘See you in Macquarie Street.’
‘Good evening, Mr Hardy.’
That, of course, left me with thoughts of Carmel and Leo Wise and the case I’d had with all the threads. Suddenly, most of the threads had been pulled and they’d led nowhere. It was hard to accept that the Agnew- Bourke trail was a red herring but there it was. I tried to think about what remained of the case but the effort made my eye throb.
Stivens had left some pain-killers and I took them with water. I wanted something stronger but there was no prospect of that. Helen had brought some books-Elmore Leonard’s La Brava and something by Clive James. I started on the Leonard and got interested but it was hard work reading with one eye. It watered, I swore and put the book down. I rang for the nurse and she told me that I’d missed the evening meal which had been served while Stivens was at work. I swore again.
‘Don’t speak like that to me. It’s not my fault.’
‘I hear you’ve got a strong union now?’
‘Yes.’
‘Good. I bet you’re guaranteed your evening meal.’
‘I can bring you a cup of tea and a snack at nine.’
‘Coffee,’ I said. ‘Please.’
I was asleep long before it came.
15
Helen drove me home in her Holden Gemini which was better sprung than the Falcon but harder to get in
